Monday, May 2, 2011

Big and small

The news of last night is so striking. It brings back so many feelings and memories of 9/11 and all that ensued. I particularly remember my 12 year old daughter trying to process the horror, writing her thoughts out that night, saving headlines, making origami cranes for peace and love and remebrance. She knew that day would change our lives, and so it proved.

I cannot celebrate any death, even of someone who inflicted so much evil. But I feel relief that he can no longer call for acts of violence, that he can no longer brag of what he did. I am grateful that this development was so carefully planned, that it did not take more lives than it did. And I am hopeful that we can begin winding down from nearly a decade of fear and war.

Please share your thoughts, if you are so moved. (But please also note our commenting policy -- messages that are hateful or disparaging will be removed by a moderator.)

This development does not affect our custom of welcoming whines and antiwhines of all stripes! On the AW side, sunshine and perfect weather! W: zit on nose, very unseemly. AW: first pasta salad of the season, and it's yummy! W: cut my finger cleaning a knife.

How are things up your way?


liz said...

These two posts say what I'm feeling today better than I could.

Complicated and Osama, Obama, and Us.

I just hope our troops can finally come home.

And I hope the voting goes well in Canada.

esperanza said...

I woke up this morning expecting all my local fb friends to be whining about the freaky weather. It's not even 60 degrees here! Long sleeves back out of the closet. Mini's were almost too small. (Sue and other cold-climate pixies, you may giggle to your heart's content).

AW: A trip to (relatively) nearby middle sized city, two messages to local-ish friends, and presto! lunch with one and a visit with the other and her kids. I should do this more often.

Sue said...

Thanks kathy a and Liz for your perspective on a very complicated day re: 9/11 and yesterday's events. And thanks Liz re: Canada's election day. I'm anxiously awaiting election returns here. We're in a news blackout until all the polls have closed.

Esperanza - sorry about any freaky weather - even the sort that would have us in shorts and flip-flops.

AW: Next set of headache injections on Wednesday in Toronto. All appendages crossed and uber-prayers that this set of injections works for a long, long tome.

W: Lovely dinner with friends tonight at otherwise good restaurant. What part of "I'm ALLERGIC to garlic and onions" would make you insert fireplacing shallots into my meal????? I wish I could have brought the chef home with me to suffer through this night with me. It won't be pretty.

AW: I managed to delicately remove said massive shallot from my mouth and washed the rest down with plenty of water, but I still feel crappy already. Good news is that they took that item off my bill. Sheesh.

esperanza said...

Sheesh indeed. And uber-prayers.

Sue said...

Aw crap. Another fireplacing Conservative majority government. Crappity crappity crappity....

Oh, did I mention...


Sue said...

Ok, there is a possible Mini-Anti-Whine in the election results.....

Conservative majority *spits* BUT an NDP opposition! That, plus the first Green Party Member of Parlaiment ever makes the night's results less barky, eh?

(NDP= New Democratic Party = further left than the Liberal Party and waaaaaay more aggressive as the opposition party).

liz said...

I'm sorry about the results, Sue. But glad that there is a strong opposition!

liz said...

Speaking of politics, I am OVER the drama in my local political group thing. Chair has cut off my account in the membership and discussion lists. Which is fireplacing STUPID y'all, 'cause I only used those lists to post announcements to my blogs, facebook, and Twitter. I'm a disseminator. That is what I do.

And he did this the day after I'd been out ringing doorbells with our best hope to unseat an obnoxious incumbent.

And he did it without discussing it with anyone.

And he did it (apparently) without being aware that the lists would send me a notice I'd been unsubscribed.

esperanza said...

Free to a good home: fruit flies

esperanza said...

Oh, for the love of fuzzy ducklings, Liz. (thanks for that one, by the way; I use it all the time). Someday I will stop being surprised when grownups act like they are in middle school.

liz said...

You are very welcome for the expression, and ugh! Fruit flies!

And thank you for the commiseration. I hate the middle-school-ness of it all.

kathy a. said...

esperanza -- yay for the visiting with friends! boo, fruitflies!

liz - -thanks for the links. and wtf with the unilateral de-listing of the doorbell queen? cluesticks, baby.

sue, hope the aftermath of the dining FAIL was not too bad. glad there is at least a silver lining to the election news.

what is this "news blackout" of which you speak? i'm on the west coast, and it is not uncommon in national elections for major media to be predicting results before our polls even close. grr.

Sue said...

Oh Liz, how awful! How could this happen to the most dedicated campaigner just be written off the list????

Cluestcks all around.

One cluestck ought to be shaped like a fly-swatter for Esperanza.

FB is busy with hackers today. Watch your account carefully. Mostly they are crude or gross videos being sent around - don't open the thread and you should be fine.

W: dear hackers, bite me. That is all.

Days said...

Gah. The election. Gah.

Also, have misplaced my birth certificate, and I can't for the life of me remember what odd place I might have left it.

amy said...

Chin hairs.

kathy a. said...

days, condolences about the election. i have no idea where my birth certificate is, either -- my best guess is that beloved stuck it someplace with our wills. but chances are, there's a way to get a new copy online...

amy -- tweezers?

esperanza said...

seriously. fruit flies--OUT!

How do I get rid of them?

Sue said...

My birth certificate is safely stored in my jewel box, just in case I ever become an elected official and some comb-over doofus needs proof that I was born, not hatched. :)

Amy - tweezers, but sometimes you have to wrestle with those Brillo pad thick ones. Aging- just as much fun as I thought it might be.

Fruit flies - not much help here. Sorry! It's still too cold for flies here. Whine or Anti-whine? You decide.....

kathy a. said...

wash all your fruit, then put it in the fridge. [yeah, i know. ugh.] rinse dishes swiftly. it's bugs vs. you...

ye olde google also offers plans for fruit fly traps, in case you want to drown any excess fruit flys in vinegar, wine, and/or dishwashing detergent after you've put the fruit in the fridge.

amy said...

I have been tweezing my chin since college. I have a couple of doozies that are chronically ingrown, and I'm getting acne-scar-looking scars on my chin and jawline. I have an appointment with the ladybits doc on Thursday and I'm thinking about asking about that cream that inhibits growth. (Starts with a V.)

Anonymous said...

All I can say is if the nice thick hairs that sprout on my chin could somehow switch with my poor thin, fine hairs on my head, I would have the hairstyle I always dreamed of.

--Neighbor Lady

esperanza said...

Neighbor Lady for Mullet. That is hilarious.

Teh Google has not met my fruit flies. They do not like the vinegar trick. They are very fond of the Baboos' bibs, no matter how many times I wash them.

Miranda said...

Signed a lease to a nice townhouse nearby. Goodbye house falling apart around me. Hello single life.

Sue said...

Hi Miranda! Glad to have you at the Pixie ball this week! I wish you all the good things that go along with having a house that is not falling down around you.

I'll second Mullet nom for NL!

Sue said...

Hi Miranda! Glad to have you at the Pixie ball this week! I wish you all the good things that go along with having a house that is not falling down around you.

I'll second Mullet nom for NL!

esperanza said...

waitjustaminute, Miranda. Did I miss something? Single life?

Sarah at ratatat said...

Wow, Miranda. Congrats, I hope.

Esperanza - we had a terrible fruit fly problem at a rental vacation house. After we left (and complained) the rental agent swore if we put out a margarine dish of liquid dish-washing soap, they would have all drown themselves. Yuck in any case.

NL! ha!

Amy - hate chin hair. hate it. My insurance co. laughed at paying for that product with a V. Have considered electrolysis...but am too lazy.

Sue - sorry for the shallot dumbness. And for the election dumbness.

Liz - what fireplacing stupidity from the local chair on the political thing.

KathyA - sorry to hear about weird FB hacking. I am addicted to FB, but I worry they are not really the best co. to have all of that (i.e. my) data.

Sarah at ratatat said...

And a whine from me: I can't decide if I am tired from being up too late or getting up too early or just a little bit sick.

And because it is such a good one - I'll second Amy's one about evil chin hair.

liz said...


JenR said...

Bronchitis... week 3.

kathy a. said...

amy, a dermo could probably zap the problem permanently. ingrown hairs are no fun.

oh, miranda. best on the changes.

sarah and jenr -- hope you feel better!

W: my computer screen has gone all wacky -- there is like a smear to the right of every letter, and it is giving me a headache. guess i'll be heading out for some early morning monitor shopping....

AW: my favorite cousin is looking for a house in my area!!!! it would be so terrific to have them right nearby.

kathy a. said...

huh. turned the computer off for 1/2 hour, and now the screen is fine. my cyber-products are trying to make me crazy...

sue, crossing fingers that this treatment works better!

Sue said...

Thanks. This time around, the doc injected Botox into all the same trigger points that she identified at my last visit. It's only been a few hours and I'm having a bit of site injection pain (roughly 20 points) but that's all for now. That's a good thing.

Sleepy now, but I can't lay flat until 10:00 pm. That is what good books are for!

Sarah at ratatat said...

Sue - crossing my fingers for you. Happy reading!

KathyA - I don't think we (husmans) are not meant to understand the mysteries of hardware. Good luck.

kathy a. said...

sue, whatcha reading?

thanks, sarah. the stupid thing crashed again, but i've got a brand new monitor all installed now.

the salesperson tried to sell me a "better" monitor, by which i guess he meant "bigger," because i never heard of the brand before, and he couldn't offer anything beyond "same price" to assure me of quality.

Sue said...

I'm just finishing Kirsten Hannah's "Winter Garden" - fabulous book!

amy said...

So, my chin hairs are my small whine. My big whine is that my mom has been pushing my buttons lately.

Standard, original buttons include (but are not limited to) my hair is a mess, my room/house is a mess, I should know better.

Modern, post-release-into-adult-world buttons include (but are not limited to) "Why the hell do you recycle? I don't know what I'm allowed to throw out in your house", my kids' hair is a mess, my son is not potty trained yet, my son is "evil" (because he's two and he teases his sister), and I'm not good enough for my husband.

Yes, the man she hated for the first 10 years we were together, she has sided with for these last 10 years we've been together. The way it surfaced most recently was when I returned home from a long weekend trip (with her and friends) and was sad because my husband hadn't really given me any indication that he missed me. Her response was "Well, you do make it hard for him."

Thanks, mom. Thanks a lot.

Recovery bonus is that after I beat myself up for the next 6 hours, my husband assured me that my mother is teh Crazay and that she knows nothing, as evidenced by her three failed marriages and the fact that she would say stuff like that.

amy said...

Oh, and he also assured me that he *did* miss me, but he instead played up how well he did as solo parent because he wanted me to feel confident that he was capable of caring for the children while I was away so that I will feel like I can go away for weekends and stuff in the future.

You know, sometimes he's a dope, but most of the time he a'ight.

kathy a. said...

oh, amy -- sympathy on the button-pushing.

liz said...


Have you tried saying, in your head when she's pushing your buttons,

"Mom, if you haven't anything nice to say, STFU."

kathy a. said...

so many buttons, so little time to push them all... i promise your son will not go to kindergarten in diapers. if she's confused about recycling (it was a new-ish concept in the early 1970's!), maybe she can just leave questionable items on the counter. as for messy hair -- this was low on our list of things to worry about; and our theory when our son started sporting green glue-spiked mohawks, etc. was that hair grows out.

the "you're not good enough for your man" thing, that one is so loaded with freight about what a woman should be. all things to all people: supermom, june cleaver, professional, devoted friend/sister/daughter, but most of all, the woman behind the man. see, she's pushing my buttons, too. ;)

amy said...

She's good, isn't she? ;)

Liz, I used to say a version of that in my head, but I got away from it. I will reinstate it post haste.

kathy, I am right there with you on ALL of those things. My mom is just a Witch With a B. She is angry and miserable and likes to make other people angry and miserable. I told my husband yesterday that I need a serious break from her, based on what I whined above and a half dozen other passive-aggressive things she said and did when she was over babysitting on Sunday. He concurs.

My goal as a parent is to be better at it than she was, and so far, I am off to an A-MAZ-ING start. If I do say so myself. :) I'm not perfect, but I am just right.

Miranda said...

Thanks for the well wishes. The separation has been five years in the making. This is a very good thing since we have moved apart sometime around the time Youngest Son was born. The other reasons fall into the category of Whines Left Unsaid.

liz said...


I am no longer a member of my county's Dem Cmte.

esperanza said...

Hugs to Miranda.

And to Liz. I'm sorry the middle schoolers got their way.

Holy cow, am I tired: trip to post office resulted in Sweet Baboo dissolving into tears (though I explained it over and over, she believed we were going to her cousin's birthday party rather than going to mail the birthday present. Sigh). The speech therapy session which followed was less than stellar. Then to the car for a couple of hours to go to Big City for pulmonologist appointment. Which was good. Long and thorough, but good. Then a couple of hours back. Then made supper for us and for a church family whose mom just had surgery (not a big deal, but bad timing for today). Then get the Baboos in bed and clean up the disaster area of a kitchen, take out the trash, sweep the floor. Whew.

Zoo tomorrow.

Sue said...

hugs and pixie good wishes to amy, miranda and liz.

W: two red-eye flights two days in a row. Bad. Idea. Soooooooooo tired.

AW: One vial of Botox stuck in various points in my head and neck via 22 injections (I counted to distract myself). One vial still in freezer in Toronto for next treatment, probably in 4 months)

AW: No pain since procedure. Yay!!

W: How do I get rid of this "waiting for the other-shoe-to-fall" feeling?

W: I cannot begin to describe how much I hate (yes, hate) Mother's Fireplacing Day. I hate the day. I hate preaching on the day (though I NEVER include it in the service - ever), I hate the cards, I hate everything about it.

All it does is remind me that I haven't had a mother for twenty years. Fireplacing cancer. Everyone heads out for their brunch and talks about breakfast in bed, and all I want to do is bury my head under the fireplacing covers all day.

But no. I get to go to church alone. Again.

Rant over. Sorry.

esperanza said...

I hate it too, Sue. I thought maybe that once I actually *was* a mother, after the infertility days, I would acutally like it. But no. Too much water under that bridge. And I know too many people like you, or people with other painful stories. Bah.

Glad your injections seem to be working...22 pokes? That seems like a lot.

Sue said...

thanks e - sorry if my M-day rant offended anyone. I hope not. It's just my own stuff...

The 22 pokes went pretty well - tiny needle, so it didn't hurt as much as it might sound. Also, by comparison to The Headache, it's pretty small stuff, relatively speaking.

kathy a. said...

hugs and chocolate to everyone. awards tomorrow.

sue, no problem with the m-day rant. i don't like it much myself.

liz said...

Sue, YAY for no pain.

Sue and Esperanza, I'm so sorry about your losses, and I'm not terribly fond of M day either.

The story of what happened:
So last night, during membership input, I asked why we'd been cut off from the mailing lists (MS wasn't there. He was in DC working on a billable case).

Chair said that I had said, in a public forum, that I would back a good friend who is running as an independent (has to as a gov't employee) over a dem incumbent; and that Mr Spock had spoken publicly against party unity in the redistricting process and that he and the other guy the Chair cut off had given "proprietary redistricting information" to the the other party's committee.

He said that there is an adhoc committee looking into what their response could be to Mr. Spock, but in the meantime, HE felt that he had to cut off our sources of information and ability to help opponents of Dem candidates.

So I said, "is that all?" He said, "yes, but I'm not going to debate you about this."

I said, "I'm not going to debate that." And I turned to everyone and said, "I never said in a public forum that I would support [my friend] over [Dem incumbent]. If you'd like to read what I said, you can see it at [my blog - DBQ], I HAVE said it to individuals, and it's true that I will be supporting [friend] over [incumbent]. I've been friends with [friend] for nearly 12 years. If he weren't running OF COURSE I'd be supporting [incumbent]. If she weren't running, there wouldn't be a problem."
Then I turned to the Chair and said, "I think I've been a valuable member of this organization. I resign."

And then I gathered up Fordon and our belongings (strategically left at the back of the room, Fordon had his DS and his headphones on),
and left.

Two candidates followed me out, gave me hugs, said they disagreed with Mike, went back in.

I've been getting emails all morning from people who are upset by what Mike did.

So, in general, this is good. He let the whole world know that he's got tyrannical tendencies and that he suffers from cranial-rectal impaction.

Sarah at ratatat said...

Wow Liz. Good to stand up for yourself and what's right.

Amy - oh my. Dealing with your mom sounds so hard. Glad your husband sees teh crazy and can back you up. And sweet of him to think of not saying he missed you so you'd feel secure going away again.

Sue - so happy the botox worked.

I have no reason to dislike mother's day, but it just doesn't do anything for me. I should buy my mom chocolate, but she doesn't really care either.

Whine of really?!?!? - shared just because I love you all and you were awesome with the sympathy when my brother's woes overwhelmed our household: my brother is getting married on Saturday. You remember the tears all summer? He's moved on. The small whine is that we're not invited, which is OK. And my parents are not invited either. Which is not cool.