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Monday, May 31, 2010

WW - Style Week Edition!

The work week, it makes me, it makes me so whiny whiny
The work week, it makes me, it makes me so whiny whiny
I want to watch tv and sit on my hiney hiney
My friends at Wednesday Whines.

This week: A challenge! Cudgel your brainies brainies
This week: A challenge! Cudgel your brainies brainies
Whine with style to make sunshine out of rainies
My friends at Wednesday Whines

Your whine can be tragic, but write it with style-y style-y
Your whine can be tragic, but write it with style-y style-y
Awards this week will go on for a mile-y mile-y
My friends at Wednesday Whines

So bring on your Haikus! Your palindromes and parodies!
So bring on your Haikus! Your palindromes and parodies!
Sickness! Floods! Bark! Pook and Families!
My friends at Wednesday Whines

Thursday, May 27, 2010

And the winners are....


Elevated Risk of Mullet Award goes to Sarah, for "The amount of crying in our house will probably lead me to drinking. Then who knows, we'll end up in a country song. Seems like a bad direction."

Best Anti-Whine Award to Liz, who confided, "On the plus side, the shirt I'm wearing has gotten 7 compliments at last count. So...I may feel like pook but I loook mahvelous."

Learn Something New Every DayAwards to all participants in this week's informational extravaganza about POS and rabbits.

Rolling Stone Award to Gary, for his excellent W/AW/W combo: the band broke up after a miserable gig; he won't miss the diva guitarist; but he'll miss the drummer.

Birthday Parade Award to Amy, whose birthday somehow did not fall on Memorial Day weekend this year, and WHERE IS THE PARADE?

Revenge of the Rube Goldberg Car Award to JenR, who owns the car problem that just keeps giving, this time in the form of the OMG credit card bill. Best with the other thing, too, JenR.

Wonders of Modern Medicine Award to Emily, who had to thrash through the thicket of a newfangled scheduling system only to learn that she does not really exist. And then she got squished.

Ms. Manners Award to Days, who brought two (2) items to a potluck as requested, and then got stinkeye from the host's daughter, who thought she didn't bring enough and should limit her servings accordingly. Pixies find that person to have remarkably bad manners.

Fender Bender Award to Neighbor Lady, who felt just terrible, but very very relieved that the BIG dent was pre-existing, and the owner very nice.

Heat Wave Awards to all Pixies suffering from an over-abundance. This award includes complimentary fans, popsicles, and iced beverages of choice.

Go Team Go Award to Sue, who finished a relay race! The Posse has a message for the bike guy who reported on your speed.

Cluesticks to Mr. Verizon Man, who brilliantly found the wrong address and woke Esperanza from a well-needed nap, escaping with his life only because the Baboos continued to slumber; and who also, all the way across the country, stalked Neighbor Lady through her front window when she didn't answer the door.

Saddest Anti-Whine Award to KLee, whose job was eliminated, so she has to transfer to a new job somewhere else, but at least she is still employed. Many hugs to you, Klee.

Yay for new babies! And onion rings! And riding a bike without training wheels! Boo on tummy ick, TMJ, medical complaints of all kinds, legal complications, calls on the day off, solo parent duty, and all manner of other afflictions. Thanks for playing!

Join us next week, when the fabulous Liz will host STYLE WEEK at the Whiner's Ball! Start working on those entertaining masterpieces of poetry, prose, and song!

Monday, May 24, 2010

Ready. Set. Whine!

It's probably May where you live, but here it is cold and likely to rain AGAIN. Universe, I do not live in Oregon! I do not want webbed feet!

My daughter's favorite cat has been sick -- he is a delicate boy, anyway, health-wise -- but he seems to be doing a bit better this morning. He snarfed down that gourmet cat food, holding off the jealous crowd wanting in on the action. Cross fingers, knock wood.

In anti-whines, had a good talk with daughter yesterday, and she and her friend in Japan both posted tons of photos from some field trip adventures! For some reason, their class went to plant rice; everybody got muddy and laughed a lot. In the apple-doesn't-fall-far-from-the-tree department, daughter is also pictured snuggling a kitten.

What's happening up your way?

Thursday, May 20, 2010

Prizes! Quick as the 100 m dash!

Gross-out Award to esperanza for bird pook on the mailbox. Ewwwwwww!

Sleepin' Like a Baby Anti-whine Award to the Mini-Baboo. With fingers crossed behind my back to avoid the jinx.

Moving to Australia Award to Sue, for a work day so bad she went home after lunch.

The Girl Scout Cookie Award for best single sentence in an anti-whine goes to amy, for "Girl Scout cookies are delicious in May!"

Achilles' Heel Award to Sarah, who is sore guess where?

Old Skool Award, Paperwork Division to kathy a and her daughter's FAFSA.

Old Skool Award, Culinary Division to Sue and the overpowering onions!

Slow Down, You Move Too Fast Award to JenR (with a cluestick gently applied to her new therapist).

Stylish Whine Award to amy, for her prayer to the lice gods.

Best Typo in a Wednesday Whine to Liz, for "Aunt Dpi." (Look at your keyboard, everyone. Or is it some new acronym I'm not cool enough for?)

And a bonus You Crack Me Up Award to Liz for "If you had a Grandma Ann, would you take her to play Bananagrams at your mammogram?"

Boo to endless underwear catalogs, potty training, being painfully tired and a touch depressed, canker sores (ouch!), pee in car seats, wasps, lack of adult conversation, and terrible job markets.

Hurray for good medical news, cute kids' sports, nice apartments, reduced prom-a-drama, and naps.

See you next week with my travel whines . . . kathy a. will be our lovely hostess.

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Whining on Schedule

Pixie vocabulary help request! I need a word for the spring-time version of what a pixie once named "Checktember." Every parent of a school-age child knows what I mean: the raft of requests for a check for this and a check for that. They accumulate at the opposite ends of the school year. (Does anyone want to take credit for Checktember? I can't remember who it was . . .)

For the next few weeks I plan to have mostly schedule-related whines. It's a busy time of year. But the whines might just include matching anti-whines, to whit:

AW: SnugglyGirl did really well at her school track meet yesterday! Woohoo! She qualified for the regional meet in three or four events. (N.B. her school is really small. She never qualified at her previous, larger school. But still! So proud!)

W: The regional meet is on Tuesday, when we were supposed to be Elsewhere. But she is sooooo excited, so we are probably tweaking our travel plans.

AW: Luckily the travel plans involve the car and not the airport.

W: But what if she does well in the regional meet? When is the city meet? Will we be away still? Note to self: call school board and see if anyone knows, since the internet is proving useless for this task.

It will only get better from here, as we burn through a college reunion, work trips, weekend at Camp, end of year festivities, and oh, right, need to plan a birthday party for more kids than I can afford to have at the first choice location. So, you know, it's spring.

How are your whines in this fine month of May?

Thursday, May 13, 2010

Awards: Wild Life Edition

This week's ceremony is brought to you by the letter D, for Deer, Dogs, and the Darnest thing. My dogs were barking (standard English usage) their fool heads off for a long time, and investigation revealed that they were playing with an equally foolish young (but much bigger) deer at the back fence, which is wire. Playing, as in running back and forth together, lunging puppylike toward one another, bending pieces of fencing with their enthusiasm. It's nothing but glamor and excitement around here -- but don't be jealous, Pixies one and all are known for their glamorous and exciting lives. ;)
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Redzils wins the That's DOCTOR To You Award , for her gripping story of her own institution advancing an offer for a post-doctoral position and yet treating her with no respect, and no title. Runners-up include numerous Pixies holding advanced degrees, and sometimes feeling moved to use them for cluesticking purposes. Fingers and toes crossed, Redzils, about the other thing.
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Liz wins the Politically Stylin' Award for her links to a hilarious Gilbert & Sullivan piece about her particular governator. Governor. (I speak Californian as a first language.)
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Sue wins the Triumph Over the Bully Award, for neutralizing something toxic, without even having to resort to stuffing his face with cookies!
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Neighbor Lady wins the coveted Elevated Risk of Mullet Award for her adventure with a car that makes weird noises except when it is presented to the mechanic: "My car is possessed. It knows just how to irritate me."
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Go, Team, Go Award to Amy, who is doing a fundraising walkathon! Stop by and support her, if you are so moved. Runner-up is Sue, signed up for a fundraising race. I am in awe; these efforts make me feel like the desk-bound slug that I am.
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Prom Drama Award to Emily, as the clothing and transportation challenges continue. Yikes!
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Many thanks to all who chimed in about Mother's Day. Greetings to Tara, and thanks for the excellent suggestion of averting one's eyes from the saccharine commercial spectacle. Passing the pecan pie.
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We Believe Awards to Days, Esperanza, and anyone else similarly situated, as they walk the tightrope between encouragement and fear of holding their beloved daughters back.
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Crossed Fingers for Sarah, whose daughter's headaches might be TMJ.
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Hugs to PK and her friends who lost so much in so short a time. Much love to JenR, and cluesticks to the stupid therapists who won't even call back.
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Condolences to all who are suffering this week from illnesses, allergies, dental woes, social clumsiness, mystery bruises, being jerked around on a thing, feeling excluded, work stuff that inspires shreiking, being blamed unfairly, bullying, conflicts in leadership styles, sleepiness, summer vacation already, executive visits, office casual, flaky teammates, anxiety about meeting goals, and every other affliction affecting Pixies and their beloveds this week.
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Thanks for playing, and see you next week!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
ETA: who knew there would be a video reflecting this week's theme?

Monday, May 10, 2010

Whiny, with a chance of ...

It's a little early, but we're opening the doors to the Whiner's Ball on account of the weather. Feels a little whiney out there.

Many hugs to our wonderful Redzils, whose over-full week was capped by a craptastic weekend. C'mon, Universe -- you can do better than that!

I've got really mixed feelings about Mothers' Day. A squishy holiday invented by the greeting card industry is pretty much destined to cause anxiety in the real world, no? My relationship with my own mother was extremely difficult. But on the other hand, there are so many parents I know and love, so many friends who helped guide and support me when I could not rely on my own mother, so many who helped us raise our own children. So, raising a virtual toast to all the moms, dads, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, honorary family, and good friends who help us all along the way.

My young adult kids totally surprised me, though. Daughter had flowers delivered; Son came by with a big bag of pastries, and his girlfriend sent lovely chocolate. In further anti-whines, the dentist parents who have been so patient with my boy are trying to find a specialist who can fix his abcessed tooth on a Saturday.

The floor is open to all manner of whines, anti-whines, and general kvetching.

Sunday, May 9, 2010

Non-Awards

Pixies, this is going to be A Week Without Awards. Your whines were read and good thoughts were sent and laughs stifled, but I don't have the energy to do more than this post right now.

Work has been crazy, so I put off doing Awards until the weekend. Then I had to go look at memorial service venues, and that shot Saturday.

Today I celebrated Mother's Day by attending a three hour play - a love story, even - with my fomer Pseudo-Mother-In-Law. You know, the one whose son I am neither marrying nor speaking to anytime soon.

Before I left for the theater my best friend called to tell me she got engaged. I'll be a bridesmaid, and they are probably getting married on my birthday. I am happy for them, but ....wow.

I think I need to go curl up in a little ball now. See you at the Whiner's Ball next week, when the marvelous kathy a. will be our host.

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Ooopsy daisy.

I was wondering when the Whining Brigadoon would appear, since I am feeling whiny. I navigated here looking for it and . . . this is a week I am responsible for making Brigadoon appear.

Oopsy daisy.

Pixies, let 'er rip. I'll be back later to join in.

~ Redzils, the little pixie that could