Monday, February 25, 2013

On your mark, get set....

Go!  What's the news in whines and anti-whines?

Don't forget the next Wednesday Book Club title, for 3/13/13 - Sandcastle Girls, by Chris Bohjalian.  Our charming host will be Esperanza.  (Don't worry, discussion is still open for What Alice Forgot!)


Correction:  THE NEXT BOOK is Beekeeper's Apprentice, by Laurie R. King, on March 20, 2013.  The rest of the schedule has been switched around as well.

Saturday, February 23, 2013

Awards Show

So this isn't exactly THE Awards Show that's coming up, but it will do for today.

Liz gets the Spine Award for her firm and careful handling of a work issue. Liz, would you be willing to conduct training workshops for the wimpy spines that some of us seem to possess sometimes? OK, for me?

Kathy a. and her Beloved get extra hugs and comfort food for the ongoing SiLfH Saga which gets worse every time we hear an installment.

Sarah gets the Moving on Up Award for making progress on separating from soon-to-be ex and his family. He, on the other other hand, gets a visit from the Cluestick Posse, for behaving like an 18 year old having a frat party.

Kathy a also receives the Mullet Award for her description of Sarah's soon-to-be ex: "pathetic ball of leftover guacamole slime." If that's not descriptive, I don't know what is.

Hugs to Sue for the return of the fireplacing headache and work troubles. And hugs to Miranda for bad dreams.

JenR gets a massage, pizza, and warm mittens for moving in the snow.

Neighbor Lady gets the Spring Cleaning Award just for remembering it needed to be done, and then doing it. Hooray, NL!

For those keeping up with the underwear saga, we are 2 dry/3 wet at this point. It appears that was *not* my final potty training whine.

Chocolate, spines, and dry underwear for all!

Monday, February 18, 2013

First World Whines

I have plenty of weighty whines that I'm pretty sure I've whined before. So here are the silly ones.

The Domestic Goddess (God bless her) only cleans one set of windows. They are ones that I use frequently, but there are a few more that bug me. I am somehow incapable of asking her to wash the others, since some deep part of me is uncomfortable that I even have the blessing of said Domestic Goddess. Neither can I motivate myself and/or my children to wash the windows that are bugging me.

Karma is biting me in the butt. I remember vividly, as a child, going shopping with my mother. She would point out some kind of outfit or garment and ask me if I liked it. "I don't know" would be my consistent refrain, whether I liked it or not. Sweet is doing the same thing. I don't know how my mother did not bonk me on the head or make me wear burlap.

My refrigerator door does not open all the way, because it hits the wall. This means that the right-side vegetable drawer doesn't open all the way either.

These whines are scarily easy to think of, so I think I'l stop now.

Saturday, February 16, 2013

Asteroid Edition

Asteroids!  That would explain this week, if Zombie Asteroids swung by, but they had limited bandwith and a spotty connection and got kind of lost on the way.   

Kudos to Esperanza for suggesting this week's Awards Theme!

The Asteroid Explosion Award goes to Anonymous, whose son was so distraught about this thing the doctor did that he said HIS DAD HAS TO GO TO JAIL and also that DAD HAS TO APOLOGIZE FIRST!  Let's all sing the chorus:  I mean it, my feelings are hurt, you can't make me.  And Anonymous performed Mama Magic, talking through the hurt feelings + apologies tangle, as well as the limited medical exception to the private parts rule.

JenR wins the Impact Crater Award, for her series of flooring surprises in the new house:  sanding won't help this decrepit floor look any better;  whoopsie, the subfloor in the bathroom is rotten!; and all this means replacement.  Like she is made of money, so she also needs to borrow from her mom.  Gah!  (But yay, mom, for not only offering, but making it sound like the only sensible thing to do.) 

Meteoric Wisdom Award to Miranda, who observes:  "Adult" children are really something.
 Let me know if you need emergency Samoas when Lent is over!

Sue wins the  Synchronized Marital Orbit Award for this:  A "discussion" with hubby yesterday when he knew I was hurting and offered this: "You shouldn't have eaten that chocolate marshmallow heart yesterday." (Don't worry, I let him live)   We are sorry the evil headache is back; glad the next appointment is scheduled; and we kinda like your sweetie despite this one error in judgment.

Cluesticks and asteroids to the fireplacing cancer.  Hugs to Purple Kangeroo, and many good thoughts for the recovery of your loved one.

Asteroid cake-pops and/or tasty meatball "asteroids" to all!  Thanks for playing!

Join us next week, here and at the Wednesday Book Club, where Sue will host a discussion of What Alice Forgot by Liane Moriarty.  It looks like other readers include Liz, Esperanza, PK, Sarah, and me.  Friends are welcome to join us at the book club!

ETA:   Liz, I totally left out your Frozen Tears That Leave A Book Blazing A Trail Across The Sky Award, for bringing the sobs on the bus. Gonna be a good discussion of the book next week!

Monday, February 11, 2013

Open Season

Let the whines and anti-whines rip!

Don't forget, next Wednesday 2/20/13 at the Wednesday Book ClubWhat Alice Forgot, by Liane Moriarty, hosted by Sue.

Friday, February 8, 2013


Seriously, today is national GS cookie day, and not a moment too soon!   Thin mints -- do we need them, or what?  Virtual boxes for everyone!

Therefore, Neighbor Lady wins the Our Hero Award, for sorting the cookies!  And also a tiara for being Super Organized About One Thing.  And that one thing is GSA, a really great organization for girls (which is not afflicted by some exclusionary policies that the similar organization for boys cannot freaking seem to figure out). 

Sue wins the Water, Water, Nowhere Award, for soldiering on through a "tea" despite no water, and no washroom, which meant a trip to the dreaded Mall, but just to use the facilities; and finally things were restored, so it's all good.  Also, Sue wins the Calm One in the Room Award, for another occasion in this busy week.  Keep calm and carry on!

Esperanza conquered, and wins the  Slayer of the Insurance Demons Award.  So glad things are moving in the right direction on that front.  Many hugs on some other items, especially losing a friend so young, and that sleep thing.  xoxo

It is hereby decreed that Sarah gets to just spend "a day where I just veg out & hang out & watch TV."  Sounds good to us!

The Cluestick Posse is dispatched to deal with those in charge of RIF's (real interesting fireplacers), because really?  Our Liz??  And many hugs to Liz. xoxo

Kudos to everybody doing something thoughtful about gun violence.  This is a public health problem; it deserves attention from many angles. 

Everybody affected by the stormzilla, please be safe and warm -- tell us how it's going (assuming you have power)!

If I've forgotten anybody, have some Thin Mints.  I swear they fix almost anything.  :)

Monday, February 4, 2013

High horses; broad rivers; windowsills

My high horse is getting something done about gun deaths and injuries.  This time, there seems to be a LOT of national interest and momentum for some very reasonable steps:  background checks for every sale; stopping sales of military-style weapons and high-capacity magazines.  Also, giving ATF a director, and the ability to do its mission; letting data be collected and crunched, so that we have a better sense of what helps and what doesn't so much.

That's right:  NRA's many efforts have included not wanting data collected.  I guess their horse is of the apocalyptic kind, but don't we need to know more about how 30,000+ people in the US are killed by guns each year, and dog alone knows how many more are injured?   So we can figure out how to not have the worst gun violence record in the developed world?  None of these proposed steps forward will make the cops come take your weapons, or infringe the rights of hunters.  They are all steps supported by police officers, and parents, and even most gun owners. 

In the broad rivers category -- sometimes important things take time to come to fruition.  Too much time!  Eyes on the prize.

Windowsills -- mine have mold.  Gah!  And if I was a better housekeeper, I'd be scrubbing the mold regularly.  But I'm not. Also, the dish fairy is MIA.

Son is home: eating the house, swapping out some stuff he left here during the move, working on his bike.  Fortunately, the crockpot has been working on a nice soup with chicken meatballs, onions, carrots, celery, mustard greens, lentils, peas, spices, broth. 

What's new with you?

Saturday, February 2, 2013

When we said "Culture," we did not mean the infectious kind...

Many apologies for the host's distraction and lateness (again) this week.  Heck of a week!  Here, have some guacamole and chips.  And, a toast to everybody!

First, congratulations and huge thanks to Liz, for beginning the Wednesday Book Club and hosting the first book, Venetia!   This is a lot of fun.

Esperanza wins the Best Architectural Feature Award for telling us about that slide from the second story balcony, at the fabulous horse place where the Baboos ride.  We are insanely jealous.  Also, yay for Boring Well-Kid Checkups!  And haircuts!

The Extreme Athlete Award goes to Sue, who added 1.4 km IN SNOW to her walking regime. 

JenR wins a contingent of Moving Fairies, and the New House Award!  We are also sprinkling Pixie Dust around the old house, to attract buyers asap.  This award comes with a voucher for a full night's sleep. 

We are sending the Divorce Fairy to Sarah, so she can get this over with already.  Also, Pixie crossed fingers on the job hunt.

Neighbor Lady wins the Be Prepared Award, and the BSA wins a visit from the Cluestick Posse.  Which in this case has increased ranks from a whole lot of former scouts explaining why BSA needs to Do The Right Thing, already.

Liz, unfortunately, brings the Bodily Fluids with MM's barfiness.  Kudos to Daddy, and yay for a quick recovery!  Hoping also that the vertigo just gets done with.

The So Long, January! Award belongs to Sue.  Good riddance!

The Posse is also dispatched, with appropriate quantities of cluesticks and legos, to:  insurance companies; stress monkies;  people who don't reply to heartfelt requests; soon-to-be exes; the universe; and other deserving parties.

Thanks for playing!