Thursday, March 27, 2008

Prizes! Not-quite-sproing! Edition

In comparison to kathy a.’s lovely flowering tree, posted last week, I still have a yard piled high with snow. Those of you in SEMI know what that looks like, I think.

This week’s Style Award goes to kathy a. for her “ode to an unfavorite rite of spring:”

accountant today.
taxes due soon; hate this.
last minute each year.

I think most of us are with you on that one. Two Wednesdays left to whine, American pixies. (Canadians get to stretch the pain out even longer.) Woohoo for finding extra deductions!

MVP Award to esperanza, for surviving “the superbowl of churchy things” during a week with plenty of extra craziness, and for excellent medical advice for Jeni.

Miracles of Modern Medicine Award to Diane, for her innovative plan to temporarily relocate her fetus to her husband’s abdomen until she gets over her cold. Maybe till the nausea lets up too. In fact, now that I think about it, maybe he could handle labor and delivery!

Honorable Mention to Jeni, who needed Modern Medicine. Wishing you a quick recovery, Jeni! And once the shoulder/neck pain subsides, you’ll probably be glad they invented laparoscopic surgery, because at least your abdomen is pretty much in one piece.

Endless Uncertainty Award to Miranda, who needs “Order! and Lists! and Plans!” concerning her husband’s imminent job change, not to mention life-after-Commencement. (And mazel tov on applying for the honor you didn’t know you deserved! The pixies know you deserve it!)

If That’s What It Takes Award to Margalit, who collapsed on the floor of city hall while trying to clear up a tax problem. Please tell us it helped . . .

Frontier House Award to Elizabeth, who is facing 4 weeks of renovations that leave her kitchen-less and maybe even un-launderable. (Maybe the washer and dryer could be plugged into a different circuit? Or maybe you could magnanimously offer to be the one who goes to the Laundromat on Sunday and take the Sunday paper with you and spend some quality time with yourself while your husband handles the kids.)

Sunshine and Flowers Award to Purple Kangaroo, to give you something lovely to think about as you survive this bout of fatigue, and to say “Thanks” for all the natural medicine advice for Diane.

Sunshine and Flowers to KLee also. I hope your migraine is better enough for you to enjoy the light. Got frequent flier miles for that trip to DC?

Three's a Crapfest Award to Kate (“batshit crazies” from her 3 year old!) and Amy (pregnancy nausea, “Now with Intermittent Insomnia and Dry Mouth!” and a peeing 3 year old!).

Thanks for stopping in to share, and see you next week when kathy a. has hopefully recovered from tax trauma enough to host!

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Gah! Edition


You know I love you guys, right? It's just that I love sleep more. (Heck, I love that guy of mine, but I even love sleep more than him, 6 nights out of 7.)

I was just about to drift off to sleep last night, thinking "I wonder who is hosting WW this week" when it hit me. I am. But I didn't vault out of bed to run to the computer, and for that I apologize.

Whine away!

Thursday, March 20, 2008


Congratulations to Uccellina and her sweet baboos, Robin and Wren, who are both home from NICU! Hip, hip hooray to Margalit, for the successful launch of a new venture, and getting stuff worked out with the school people! Happy Birthday to Liz!

Hugs, saltines, and plenty of fluids to Sarah and Amy, who are suffering from morning-noon-and-night sickness and/or the flu. More hugs for Esperanza, whose cute and talented sweetie-pie is still on oxygen (but growing well, yay!), and who has incoming relatives. For the relatives, we have an exclusive coffee-stained, photocopied Guide to Local Take-Out Food.

The Let Them Eat Cake for Breakfast Award, for brilliant parenting during the household pneumonia crisis, goes to That Mommy! The vast majority of Pixies, plus Blogger, agree that cake is a perfectly acceptable food group.

The "Sacrifices We Make" Award and several helpings of breakfast cake go to Turtlebella, for a classic whine about the fabulous in utero experience. We suggest engraving the whine in full on a tasteful plaque, for prominent display during those teen years. Kudos to the Pixies who restored Turtlebella’s hope on the soft-cheese-front.

The Elevated Risk of Mullet Award to Diane for her exclusive report on toddler refrigerator-licking – which I’m sure we can all agree is better than some things found in the vicinity of their mouths – and probably has nothing to do with the soft cheese.

The Grammatically Hopeless Run-on Sentence Award goes to Miranda, for her excellent rant:

I don't have any shareable whines this week beyond the fact it's Easter on
Sunday and I have a ton of work and the kids are home for YET ANOTHER WEEK
starting this Friday and Older son's track practices WILL BE THE DEATH OF ME and I am thoroughly sick of driving my children all over town for their myriad
activities which all seem to be culminating in April which is also my absolute
busiest month.

Condolences to all the Pixies afflicted this week with: sleepless children crawling into the big bed; developmental milestones; spring break; students getting on one’s last nerve; cancer scares; helpers who ask too many questions; spouses who bring home pneumonia; flu, in all its versions; underwhelming volunteer opportunities; infection in a most delicate area; mono; elevated blood sugar; dead-tiredness; school showdowns; overnight parties involving non-stop gaming; mysteriously broken special objects; that annoying non-stop begging; missing dishes and utensils, and the children who will not dig them out from under the bed and go wash them already; crankiness; students who may still be drunk from Monday; allergies; baby pee, or pee of any kind in an inappropriate place, frankly; food and activity restrictions; company coming; way too much work; personal pukies from whatever cause; pain down to the toenails and leg hairs; Holy Week overdrive; days off that aren’t actually full days off; forgotten ingredients in the applesauce spice cakes; and, of course, messy houses and/or kitchens and/or bathrooms.

Thanks to everyone for playing this week! Passing fresh and baked apples, chocolate, and Peeps to all in need. Remember, next Monday is Cheap Candy Day! See you next week, when the Brigadoon will be hosted by the gracious Madeleine.

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

March Madness at the Whiner's Ball!


Busy, busy, busy these days. Worked out of town the entire weekend. The next week and a bit include: Lots more work, no more pay! Daughter coming home for spring break! And she's hoping to talk us into an overseas trip next summer -- can we say, "dream on"? Extended family coming for Easter dinner! Speed clean-and-junk-stashing, since company's coming! Wedding anniversary! The annual dash to get my badly-organized tax stuff together so the accountant can do his thing and save us from certain doom! And, a followup vet visit for my lame kitten who really hates the vet and wishes for me to know that he is fine, perfectly fine thank you, just bring some more catnip, please!

Not a bad balance of whines and anti-whines, overall. The beauty of the springtime and long hours of light are pushing my mood-o-meter into the happy zone, for the most part.

How's by you, Pixies? Bring your whines and anti-whines, big and small. Special prizes for style, humor, and old skool. Cluesticks for the deserving others. Whine early and often!
Bonus Survey: If you are wondering why I posted early while whining about being busy, you have not met my patented Procrastinatory Productivity Program; work speed is definitely enhanced by noodling about on ze intertubes while contemplating undone tasks. What are your special productivity tips?

Thursday, March 13, 2008

Awards: The Tie Dyed Edition

Today's awards are dedicated to Deadheads everywhere. While I did not, sadly, get exposed to that movement in my life, I can heartily endorse it's live and let live philosophy.

The Tie Dyed Clue Stick Award goes to Margalit: You can wear what you want and you have every right to let ensure that your children get the proper care from their clinicians and educators. This award comes with several boxes of Rit dye and three white t-shirts.

I also give the runner-up Tie Dyed Clue Stick Awards to KLee for dealing with, perhaps, deliberately clueless parents and Uccellina because breast milk is gold and hard won and how dare that nurse complain?

Our next award is Tie Dyed Streamers for Amy, Turtlebella and Sarah for when they make the "official" announcement that they are expecting sweet baboos. You will notice that there is a box of crackers under the streamers to help get you through the rest of the nausea and some yoga pants to accommodate your baby bump. Congratulations!

To Sue, you win the Tie Dyed Towels award to be used in your fully functioning shower. Hopefully, today.

For DevilMacDawg, I award one VW Bus to be shared with everyone in your department. That is an incredible amount of tragedy all at one time. Take the bus and run away when you must.

Posters of South Padre Island to all the Pixies on Spring Break this week bu are at home covering family responsibilities and (trying to) get their page counts written.

Finally, our coveted Elevated Risk of Mullet Award goes to Madeleine for her whine we are *so close* to the all-time snowfall record for our city, and if we don't hit it we will have done a lot of shoveling and just missed the record books. Now I know how the Olympic silver medalists feel. That observation was pure gold, Madeleine.

Enjoy your week, Pixies. We'll be back next week with the incomparable Kathy A hosting the festivities. Hugs and my daughter's really amazing homemade brownies for everyone.

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Spring Break! WOO HOO!

Greetings, pixies! I am deeply engrossed in the festivities surrounding my spring break. So far, I've watched (more) snow fall, been around more to drive my children to myriad activities, and have sipped some beer alone as I cry at my results. A classmate, who still lives with his parents at 27, emailed me to demand I have fun over this break.

Pixies, I think being an undergraduate at the age of thirty something has officially lost all of its charm.

Anti-whine: My pending graduation has posted to my transcript.

Anti-whine the second: I am attending a summit on a topic I am passionate about and the presenters are those whose research I am indebted for in finishing my own project (although, see above).

Let this salon commence with tea, cookies, and bread and butter in the style of Alice Roosevelt Longworth, whose biography has has me completely engrossed these last few days. I think she would approve of our gathering as her favorite cushion was embroidered with the phrase: If you don't have something nice to say about someone, come sit next to me.

So let the diatribes against sore nipples, endless illnesses, recalcitrant teens, evil bosses, and uncooperative spouses/in-laws/co-workers begin!

Friday, March 7, 2008

Prizes! Baby boom edition

First of all, congratulations to Uccellina and JenR on the arrival of your babies! May they give you nothing but anti-whines for the rest of your lives. And if there should be a little bitty whine here and there along the way, you know who to whine to.

Old Skool prize goes to Turtlebella, whose Girl Scout messed up her cookie order. A tragedy of Thin Mint proportions, for sure. (If I wasn’t giving out the prizes, I’d be in the running for this one with my epic tale of chapstick lost and found. I will spare you that riveting story. It ended well.)

Style prize, no doubt, to Amy’s letters to Potty Training and Pampers. You tell ‘em, Amy!

Stairway to Heaven prize to Liz, for suggesting the staircase-to-sleep relaxation technique. I tried it myself last night. I guess it works because I can’t remember what number I got down to.

Hugs to Kathy A. and KLee for workplace angst, and Debangel and Margalit for daughters who make you crazy.

Extra hugs to Sue for insomnia during the busiest time of the year, on top of teh headaches.

And to all a good weekend!

Tuesday, March 4, 2008

March Creeps In Edition

Hooray for March. Or, um, anyway, at least it isn't February.

My whine: Sore right hand and muscles on right side.

Anti-whine: Soreness is the result of a community service project I engaged in yesterday. By which I mean, I dug the ice away from the curb near the storm drain just uphill from my house. My motivation was not entirely community-oriented, I admit. The water that was trickling in a big circle around the storm drain was pooling in the slush next to my car door and I wanted it gone. I managed to make some headway by myself, but the ultimate raging success owed much to a neighbor who joined me, first with his own spade and then later with a large ice pick. The ice pick did the trick!

Bonus anti-whine: After nearly four years in this house, I now know the name of the man 3 houses west.

Bonus whine: Tonight's forecast is snow, ice pellets, and freezing rain.

Great big bonus anti-whine: Uccellina had the twins! She's already updated her first announcement with good news about Little Girl. Welcome, pixie twins!