Monday, November 25, 2013

Thanksgiving/Hanukkah Whines (others welcome)

Here is where the Texas comes out in me: it has been gray, cold, and rainy for FOUR days in a row. Where is my sunshine? It has not been above 42 in FOUR days. I cannot survive under these conditions.

We canceled our plan to leave yesterday afternoon due to predicted icy weather near the grandparents' house and near Sweet's doctors' appointments this morning. Said icy weather did not materialize. Our weather people are notorious for getting all excited about potential wintry weather.

So now we are at home and have rescheduled the doctors' appointments for a less-convenient time.

Possible antiwhines in the whole mess:
* not driving in this nastiness
* less stressful Sunday (I was preaching yesterday, so we couldn't leave till after church)
* I got to attend an ordination service I wanted to go to
* we are keeping Sweet's nasty snotty cold germs to ourselves for one more day
* she is not at her best, so likely would not have been cooperative with the appointments anyway (and this is one time we really need her to be cooperative).

Leaving tomorrow morning for Thanksgiving festivities and germ swapping.

P.S. Due to aforementioned festivities and germ swapping, the awards show may be delayed/canceled. You can whine about that if you want.

Sunday, November 24, 2013

Quick Awards

The Kitchen Magic Award goes to Queen of West Procrastination, for her chickpea soup recipe:  "chickpea soup. 1 can chickpeas, about half as much carrots, 2c chicken broth (or veggie broth, or water), some onion and garlic. Cook for half an hour, puree, and add cumin, curry, maybe a squeeze of lemon, or maybe a touch of some kind of hot sauce."  Thin with more broth, if desired.  Excellent when that thing that's going around hits your house.

Miranda's Tween Son wins the Showtime! Award, for an outstanding performance!  And Miranda wins the Excellent Mama Award.  Sending hugs for the other thing, and congratulations on the workplace awesomeness.

The Ouch Ouch Ouch Award goes to Esperanza's Mini, on the occasion of sitting in fire ants.  OUCH!

Sue wins the Wretched Meeting Award, with a bonus complimentary cluesticking for those people who keep scheduling it on the only day off she gets each week (and that's if she's lucky and nothing dire happens to a congregant).

Many, many hugs to Liz , and all others affected by the awful tragedy that left her friend seriously wounded and his son dead.  The members of this group strongly favor adequate mental health services, and now.  xoxox

The Autocorrect Fail of the Week Award goes to QWP, whose device provided "Euro" when she meant "work."

Potty Challenge Awards to Esperanza, whose Sweet adores the porta-potty and uses it even more than necessary, and to Neighbor Lady, whose daughter hates them so much that she'll hold it (theoretically) forever.  The coveted Elevated Risk of Mullet Award goes to NL, for her theory of universal conservation of pee.

Liz is hereby named The Enforcer, for her vigorous defense of a beleaguered Pixie, including the epic:  "Hand me a cluestick, I'm heading up to Canada."

Esperanza wins the Boundaries Award, for working on defenses against an intrusive person intent on being the Preacher's Wife's Best Friend.  Ralph is on his way!

Middle Earth Canada (or at least that portion now known as Hobbiton) wins a hearty Welcome to the last century; who knew that party lines were still in use within memory?

See you next week, when Americans celebrate Thanksgiving and everyone celebrates Hanukkah,  meaning that the feast will definitely include latkes!

Monday, November 18, 2013

Gratitude and grumbles

My intertubes have conveniently provided a new skool complaint:  ye olde main email is out.  Again.  The gratitudinous flip-side is that just a couple decades ago, I could not have imagined the joys of instant connections with the rest of the planet, anytime I want.  I had email then, but at home it was dial-up.  The connection went kaflooey if we had an incoming call. 

Stop me before I start in on cell phones.

This week is inducing a lot of reflection.  It is 50 years since JFK was assasinated; I was six, and I did not know how it was possible for the president to die. The nation ground to a halt; the most comparable event in my kids' lives was 9/11 -- which was also so inexplicable and horrifying.  I am grateful that such things happen rarely in this part of the world; and wish that thousands of other things were not (nowadays) reported as if they were of that magnitude.  Perspective, people.

Kitchen report:  enchiladas are really messy to make!  But, mmmm.

Wildlife report:  The dog got really spoiled when everybody came over for pie on Friday, and she thinks she prefers to be a free-range indoor dog full-time.  (Not happening.  There are rules.)

What's happening in your corner of the universe?

Saturday, November 16, 2013

Autumn Awesomeness

Here, pull up a cushion and join us for some sushi!  We had a lovely dinner last night to celebrate my beloved's birthday -- got the VIP room with tatami mats and everything -- and enjoyed a fun evening with the kids, son's delightful girlfriend, and the cool cousins.

In very exciting community news, Wednesday Whining adopted, by unanimous consent, the motto "Whatever Works."  Thanks to Liz for installing the tasteful banner.

Furthermore, we elected Ralph as the team mascot.  Ralph is the person someone else thinks you are, but you aren't; and among Ralph's responsibilities will be regular appearances with the Cluestick Posse

The Posse plans to visit conflict-ridden adults who can't behave like they're out of high school, the county drainage commissioners who left behind a trail of destruction, retailers who run out of the reasonably-priced item one needs, insurance companies, certain politicians, those mean kids, and other deserving persons or entities.

It turns out that several otherwise dignified Pixies share the ability to get stuff all over their otherwise clean clothing.  We are proud to award Sue the coveted Elevated Risk of Mullet Award, for "As for the spilling, sigh. I am a breathing, walking placemat. Seriously." 

On a related note, Liz wins the Crime Scene Fashions Award for the nosebleed that ruined her pink turtleneck.  Fortunately, Liz is also the in-house expert on silver linings and locating sales, so she swiftly found a replacement. 

Also rocking the fashions this week, Queen of West Procrastination wins the Happy Haircut Award; she is now sporting an actual pixie instead of an actual mullet!  How happy is the haircut?  "Anything is possible in a world where I have this haircut!"

The Unwelcome Visitor Award goes to Esperanza, who aquired chiggers in the course of duty, in unscratchable places.   JenR contributes the Homegrown Solution, clear nail polish.    

QWP wins the Addition to the Lexicon Award, for "mulletacular."  Runner up is Esperanza, with "albatrossi," the plural of a work albatross.

 Neighbor Lady wins this week's Parenting Challenge Award, for expertly helping Neighbor Boy through this bullying situation.  Brava!  And Kudos to NB!

The Spare Bunny Award goes to QWP, who finally found an object that lulls Lil E to sleep.

Esperanza wins a prize for Political Observation of the Week:  "Is it bad that Texas feels relieved that the mayor acting like an idiot is not from our state? Nothing against Canada, it's just a relief that they don't ALL belong to us :)" 

Sue wins the Not-a-Triangle Award, for negotiating a situation.

Sigh of relief and many hugs for Purple Kangaroo's young relative, who does not have a br@in tum0r or cyst!  Big Pixie Excitement for PK's ever-closer due date!

Monday, November 11, 2013

Smack in the middle of Fall

Remembering those who have served, on this Veterans' Day.

My beloved has a birthday next weekend.  I am never, ever to repeat the 40th birthday surprise party, but we'll have a nice family dinner.  It is surprisingly difficult to schedule 6 adults. 

News this week:  we are on track for one of the driest calendar years evah.  Bleah.

For reasons unknown -- or, if you prefer, my advanced procrastination techniques -- I'm suddenly stuck on holiday planning.  Will need to make a number of fun felt stockings, and am thinking about designs.  Secret stocking stuffer tip:  this website stocks individual/travel sizes of all kinds of things!   I was looking for gourmet items in tiny jars, but they have just about anything you can think of, including items for special diets.  Tons of single-serving spices and sauces (perfect for backpackers or those traveling to the land of bland food).

Fluids:  the elderly diva cat has decided to pee on the bathroom floor.  All.the.time.  Better than the carpet, but still darned weird. 

What's on your mind?

Friday, November 8, 2013

Post-Election Awards Show

First of all, I apologize up front if I miss someone's favorite whine. 110 comments, people.

Pixie of the Week (I know, we usually don't have this, but I feel it is warranted this week) goes to our very own favorite candidate, Liz! She ran an exceptionally classy campaign (with a now-famous campaign manager!), tightened the race with the incumbent, AND manages to find the bright sides in not winning the seat. And all in a week that saw the death of her grandmother. Much sympathy and many hugs, Liz. Put your feet up this weekend, sister. You deserve a break.

(Un) Employment Awards to kathy a's long-suffering daughter. We know that job is out there, somewhere, and not amongst the scammers.

Parenting Award to QWP, for the days of attempting to work while entertaining Lil E all by her lonesome. Black eyes and naps and no naps and syringes and pook-awakenings and shag carpet and eeek! Kudos to 10 year olds and to grandparents for pitching in.

Teachers Award to the fabulous and hard-working Neighbor Lady, who is putting everything she has and then some into this first year. You have our admiration, NL. And I hope my Baboos someday have a teacher as dedicated as you

Neighbor Girl gets an award just for being in middle school. Blech, the mean kids. So happy she enjoyed the service project and hanging out with the guys.

Sue gets the Elevated Risk of Mullet this week, as she defines the rules of the pixie cheering squad: "I will not wear a short skirt - pompoms yes, but not the skirt" So say we all, Sue, but thanks for making that clear!

Miranda receives the Old Skool award, for what is kind of a new skool whine, the death of her beloved phone. We hope you can replace it soon.

Healing wishes to kathy a's cousin's son, Sue's wonderful hubby, Sue's head, p_k's internal organs, p_k's young relative, hurt feelings of those on the receiving end of meanie comments,

Cluesticks (it's a looong list this week) go to job scams and those who profit from them; people who post links to other people's online identities; people who criticize other peoples' feelings of gratitude; stooopid election boards, kids who are mean to other kids, and any one else who is in need.

Ten-year-old playmates/babysitters/heaven-sent entertainers to all babies in need of them, and their parents. Chocolate for everyone else.

More whining next week!

Monday, November 4, 2013

Whiny Whining

How's it going, pixies?

Liz's Big Day is this week. Break a leg, Liz! You've got the whining pixies behind you!

In the First World Whines division, I am shopping for a new laptop. I am currently using one that used to be Mr. E's, approximately 4? 5? years old. It is enormous and heavy, the trackpad doesn't work (an unfortunate encounter with my own glass of milk) and I want something new. My budget does not allow for Apples. The other options are overwhelming, and underwhelming, all at the same time. Wah.

Share your whines and antiwhines, the highs and lows of your week. And we'll be on pins and needles to hear Liz's victory speech!

Saturday, November 2, 2013


Lovely refreshments this week, including leftover Halloween candy, gluten-free lasagne, raspberry oatmeal bars, brownies, and margaritas.  

First up, the Devious Preschooler Award goes to Mini Baboo, for a classic of the genre:  "you don't need to come in tonight. I can put myself in bed. Don't come in my room."  Totally worked like a charm.  ;)

JenR's boy wins the Talking the Talk Award, for his sudden and exciting explosion of verbal prowess!  He obviously understands it all; we predict that you will be hearing a great many opinions!

And Lil E wins the Future Pulitzer Award for her third word, "book." 

Queen of West Procrastination wins the Child Safety Dilemma Award, Frozen Tundra Edition, for the problem of getting a squirmy toddler safely into the car seat, bundled as is necessary for Frozen North conditions, when the seat specs include "no bulky clothing" and the toddler in question hates both headgear and mittens.

The Not a Fan of the Corn Maze Award goes to Esperanza, who is also bah humbug about the recent holiday overload.  But Esperanza also wins the Bovine Fact of the Week Award for her report on waterbeds for dairy cows! 

Sue wins the Sweet Sleep Award, for getting some!  And she says it's just like a vacation!!

Our own Doorbell Queen, Liz, is on the final stretch of her campaign, knocking doors and taking donations!  GO LIZ GO!   She wins the Stoopid Opponents are My Favorite Kind Award, possibly a sign that the universe is in favor of critical thinking skills.  

The Margaritaville Award goes to Miranda, who got a fun night on the town complete with "Spookaoke" after a jam-packed re-entry to the federal workforce.  

The Cluestick Posse is led by several Pixies of petite height this week, planning a visit to the media geniuses who cannot find a way to hold a press conference where a short official's face actually shows above the bank of microphones.  News Flash:  some people are not 6 feet tall. 

Much love to Eh, Nonny Maus, who is struggling with some stuff.  Best to you and the kids.  xoxoxo

Fond thoughts for Spotty the excellent gerbil, and Liz's family.

Many thanks for your kind thoughts about the loss of our Buddy.