Sunday, August 23, 2009

Separation Anxiety Edition

Daughter finally started packing on Friday, for her year away. She's currently on a plane over the Pacific, and will reach her hotel near the university in about 20 hours. So far, it only appears that she forgot to pack earrings -- not bad, considering the frenzy of the past couple of days. For, before one can pack, one must unpack the things dragged home in June. There was laundry to be done; there were needed items to acquire. There was sleep to be missed. There was mother/daughter synchronized hormonal enhancement.

In antiwhines, there wasn't any yelling. She did get it all done! This morning she started crying as the last few items got stuffed into bags. In an act of maternal bravery, I held off until she got through airport security. Her dad and I finally staggered off, clutching one another and remembering all those things that make it hard to let her go.

What's the news up your way?


Madeleine said...

Sending hugs, kathy. I hope your wait for news hasn't been too fraught.

liz said...

Hugs and tissues.

And I love this, "There was mother/daughter synchronized hormonal enhancement."

kathy a. said...

her second plane landed a few hours ago, so she is probably asleep in the hotel by now. dorm checkin is in about 9 hours. we are still pacing around fretfully.

there was one other preparation glitch -- saturday night, when it was too late, we discovered they recommend lots of traveler's checks, and that the ATM she relies upon at home is probably worthless there. her credit card and wad of yen should be enough to take care of what she needs [just books and incidentals] until she gets a japanese bank account set up. we hope.

consoling myself with the thought that next time she embarks on a major life project, she'll be sweating the details a while in advance. also, there was no yelling.

esperanza said...

I'm sure she's slumbering peacefully, yen tucked safely away. I'm kind of surprised they recommend traveler's checks; anywhere I've been lately, traveler's checks have been a real pain in the butt. Advice from a detail queen--you may need to notify the credit card company that it will be used overseas. Otherwise, they may not approve the transaction.

Peacefulness to you too, kathy a

kathy a. said...

traveler's checks are kind of a pain, which is why she didn't want to get them. i'll just have to cross my fingers on the credit card; she got it in her name only, so she'll have to deal if there is a glitch -- but having one was highly recommended.

OK, enough mom-whining from me. way more than enough. we need some style; we need some old skool; and especially some mullets.

liz said...

The bottoms of my feet resemble, in color, the hind quarters of a baboon and they feel like someone rubbed them vigorously with coarse grit sandpaper.

Also, every time I stand up, my calves yell at me.

But it was fireplacing worth it.

esperanza said...

Liz gets some sort of prize for inducing me to click on that link. That's a mental image I didn't really need.

And ouch.

KLee said...

I have to go back to school on Wednesday. Wah! Expect some late-evening whining from me!

In addition to the fact that because of the crappy economy, we've be told we all get a 3% pay DECREASE this school year! So, not only do we still have to mold the minds of the young, we have to do it for even less than the paltry sum we were already making. Hoo-frickin'-ray.

Sarah at ratatat said...

Hugs and something soothingly alcoholic for KathyA.

I can't even imagine it - my oldest turns 8 tomorrow. And I am throwing a spa party for me. Can I really paint 7 sets of toes and fingers? And feed them? I made it an all day party to avoid the sleepover. Hmmm, I knocked taking 1-2 friends to a real spa off the list due to cost, but after my frenzy of buying activities and crafts and nail polish, I am not sure the economics are completely straight.

Please, oh Pixie power, grant me no 8 year old girl drama, decent weather to shoo them outside, and infinite patience.

On the whine side, my mom had a surgery (recovering nicely, pleased) and cannot pick the baby up for a month. And I scheduled this home birthday party a week later. So I am not only going to juggle 7 girls, but the 11 month old.

When I went into labor at 2 am tomorrow 8 year ago, I was shocked and dismayed to be 2 weeks early. And her pre-beginning of school birthdays is a whine every year.

Whine the second: birthday girl is waking up every night with stomachaches. The doctor did an x-ray today to rule out more serious issues...but no, constipation. Sigh.

Sarah at ratatat said...

Liz- are the feet from all of the doorbells you've been ringing? Go Liz! Your poor feet.

Sue said...

(((kathy a.))))

Anti-whine: I just returned from conducting my nephew's wedding in Halifax on Saturday. It was beautiful - everything went so well and it was SO wonderful to have all four of us sisters together in one place! Even Dad was there and he had a great time too. I just feel really blessed.

Whine: Hurricane Bill put a stop to any Sunday post-wedding gatherings. It was only Category 1 by the time it hit us and we were safe in the hotel. Still, the party would have been nice, as it was planned to be on the beach near Peggy's Cove (where the most damage was done actually). Oh well...


Anti-whine: Still on vacay 'til Sept 1st.

Whine: Copious emails re: work waiting on both email accounts. I refuse to open or read them. Boundaries people. Boundaries.

Sue, aka Broken Record on the Boundaries Issue Woman of the Century - or something like that. (It's late and I've been on airplanes and in airports for the past twelve hours. Tie-tie. Must sleep. Kittehs await...)

kathy a. said...

ah, sue. a great set of anti-whines plus boundaries!

hugs to liz, klee, and sarah.

pixies, i am an instant convert to skype. one does NOT need to have a camera and present oneself in jammies and/or etc. we talked to daughter twice tonight [or, morning, her time]!! got a tour of her dorm room! and heard about the fellow students she met on the trip to town! yay!

Madeleine said...

Hooray for Skype, properly used!

Sarah, we had a round of the stomach ache diagnosis routine with Snuggly Girl a few years back. No fun. In her case the prime culprit is dairy and we still keep her on a limited amount of it. Here's hoping you find a pleasant tasting way to get things moving and maybe even figure out if anything in particular is triggering it.

A. Nonnie Moose said...

Whine of irritation: A relative seems incapable of communicating with me except to criticize. This has happened so many times the past couple of years that I have a strong emotional response, instantly, to the bossiness, the lectures, the condescension. She views herself as extremely organized and competent [true, although that does not confer expertise in absolutely everything], and I don't think she even realizes how strident she sounds. Any mention of my discomfort results in a full blast about my deficient character. Vicious cycle. I need to figure out how to ignore this garbage.

Sue said...

A. Nonnie Moose - I know what you mean. I have had a relative with a similar nature and it's really rough trying to deal with it. Mostly I just shore up all my inner strength and confidence before family events and repeat this mantra in my head: "It's her stuff, not mine. It's her stuff, not mine."

It generally works long enough for me to tolerate a dinner and leave early but politely.

If it gets really bad, don't forget the the Cluestick Posse is always ready here at the Whiner's Ball!

Whine: More. Work-related. Emails. Argh. Not going there. I am still off for a full week - what part of that don't these people understand?????

liz said...

Sue, set your email up to send an automatic "away" message. You can still read and answer those you want to answer, but the others are getting a reminder that you. are. on. VACATION!

liz said...

Hey! Do any of y'all want to come to a fundraiser for Mr. Spock which will have the Governor of my state (and current chair of the Dee En Cee) in attendance?

Sue said...

Oooo Liz - Great idea!! Why didn't I think of that???? I think my brain has been on holidays too... Duh!!

~off to set up "away" message~

Thanks Liz.

Madeleine said...

Whine/anti-whine, nine year old style:

SG: I'm bored!
Me: Are you bored enough to come try on some clothes your grandma sent?
SG: Yes!

And she did.

esperanza said...

No way, no how do you answer emails on vacation. Pretend you are in a far-away tropical location (you know, without the heat and humidity) without internet access, or phone, or even tv. That's the whole point of vacation.

Big A/W: I saw the OB last Friday, and she gave me an A+. How I love to get good grades! She said I can *start* to do a little bit more, as I feel like it.
Whine: Apparently, after one sits on one's posterior for a good three weeks, one doesn't feel like doing much. The Sweet Baboo and I went to church on Sunday, and I was wiped out for the rest of the day. The couch and I are still good friends.

Whine: the following conversation with the OB:
Me: So is there a warning sign I should watch for *before* the bleeding?
Her: No, not really.

And, finally (for now, anyway): I am so tired of this weather. It's been over 100 degrees for more than 50 days this summer. Hot and no rain, hot and no rain, hot and no rain. I'm ready for something different.

Sue said...

Yay esperanza for the good check-up, but please do take it easy anyway. I know it's none of my business, but on the other hand we Pixies are kind of like your interweb self-designated mothers/sistahs/doulas and BFFs. As part of your posse, I hope you will continue your close relationship with said couch.

Whine: The hotel I was staying at didn't have the channel with my favourite Southern former prosecutor, now talk show host. I missed five episodes of her rants!!

Anti-whine: - tonight she had my favourite lawyer guest on the show. The one who always starts her comments with a rhyme - the lawyer's name is Susan Somethingorother - but I just call her Dr. Suess...

Tabloid journalism at its best. Ah, it's good to be home.


Why are you all looking at me like that?

Everyone has a guilty pleasure, right? It could be worse than nancy "Let's Unleash the Lawyers" grace.

Just sayin...

kathy a. said...

it's a sign of my profound cultural ineptitude that i have no idea what you are talking about, sue. but guilty pleasures, what the heck.

esperanza -- yay on the checkup! boo on the heat! passing the chocolate. or frozen drinks. your choice.

Madeleine said...

Frozen chocolate drinks, please.

Sue said...

kathy a. - I confess to watching the Nancy Grace show on HLN. There you have it. Guilty as charged. It's soooooooo cheesy and lame, but for some reason I keep tuning in....

sarah at ratatat said...

Keep sitting Esperanza, and keep getting A pluses!

Sue, I am with KathyA, not sure what your guilty pleasure is, but nearly all guilty pleasures should be indulged.

Just want to report that the spa birthday party was a success! An anti-whine.

My mom, who helped, was awesome. We both were convinced that although we woke up on Tuesday, it had to be Saturday night by the time all of the kids left. On the bright side, the 6.5 hour party was only about an half hour too long.

Thanks for the idea, Madeleine. I have proposed food allergies for various ailments over the years and my doctors always shoot me down. I must not describe it right. If the stomachache persists after school starts I think an elimination diet may be in order.

liz said...

sarah, try Miralax in Gatorade. Tasty and effective.

liz said...

W: The cafeteria here sucks
AW: I had lunch there with a good friend and fellow-canvasser who works in Building Down The Hall.

kathy a. said...

W: just got my first spam on skype. wtf?

AW: my delicate cat's digestives have finally settled down since all that packing nonsense is over.

AW: albatross work thing got done and mailed. that's a load off.

W/AW: beloved bought a camera ["for you!" he said] for skyping daughter -- as if anyone needs to see conditions here at chez mom's home office, a place so glamorous that it has two litter boxes and uncountable piles o' stuff. we agreed that the camera can be turned off, but "she'll want to see the pets sometimes."

esperanza said...

AW: Books! From the FedEx guy! From Kathy A! Thank you!

W: One very whiny Sweet Baboo. Who told her it was Wednesday????

AW: Mr. E. is currently keeping me sane by playing with said whiny girl until bedtime.

Sue said...

kathy a. - if I had skype, we could compare "uncountable piles o'stuff"!! AND we could have kitteh skyping too - I wonder if they would see the other kitty and talk a bit...

....on second thought - one of mine would be too good for skype (everything except tuna is beneath her, being royalty and all) and the other would run away because he would be scared.

Spam on skype??? That's just wrong.

KLee said...

First day back to school, and so far it's been a good, if hectic start.

Got to work today to find our classroom had the furniture of TWO classrooms, consolidated into one. There is WAY more furniture stuffed into that room than should ever be stuffed into a classroom.

I'm hoping that the problems that I have had for the past two years are now a thing of the past. They seem very nice, and have welcomed me with open arms. I hope things stay this nice. I'm so, so tired of feeling unwanted and undervalued.

Am now just reduced to hoping that I do not have too heavy a pay decrease come August 31st. It's not like we made all that much to start with.

amy said...

My Back to School Whine is that we still don't know what days of the week the tot will be going to school or who her teacher will be. Now, our school year doesn't start until after Labor Day, but I'm starting to get twitchy. (It's also a two full day and one half day a week plan, which I think is dumb.)

KLee, I don't get it. I never have, I guess, but although I understand that sometimes people's pay gets cut when the budget has problems, but teachers? Srsly? How dumm is that?

liz said...

My whine is I had a brilliant idea. It was brilliant, I tell you. And I handed this brilliant idea off to the people who could make it happen, who also think it's brilliant. And they told other people who could really make the brilliant idea shine and sparkle brilliantly and they think the idea is brilliant too. And it will happen...but not for another couple of weeks.

I hate waiting.

Sue said...

Yup Liz - waiting sucketh, big time. I hear ya.

KLee - I'm glad that this year is starting out on a better footing, but the pay thing is a worry. I don't get it either. Come and work in Canada - our teachers are VERY well paid. Their union is one of the strongest in the country.

Amy - we went through all that "which days, which teacher" thing for both JK and SK for both boys. It's always unsettling until things are, well, settled.

Actually my late whine is that on Tuesday I go back to work full time for the first time since April 2008 and I'm having anxiety about it that is very reminiscent of those days just before the new school year when I was a child.

Will I have a good year? Will they like me? Will I do well?

How is it that I'm 50 and still having the same anxiety pangs that I had at the age of 5? Argh.

I know I'm good at what I do - I am still concerned about whether I can pull it off at full time hours. I guess I'll find out soon enough....

liz said...

Sue, you can pull it off by reminding yourself and others that full-time means 40 hours and not 60. Okay?

kathy a. said...

what liz said. also that old standby, "i'm so sorry, but i have other obligations."