Monday, January 3, 2011

Back in That Saddle

Here at Casa Esperanza, we have returned from the grandparents' house and are back in our routine, for better or worse.

* The sleep, she is better. Oh my, did the Baboos not sleep well. Sweet wanted to party in the middle of the night, and Mini wanted midnight snacks constantly. Grandma, Mr. E and I all pulled middle-of-the-night shifts. So. The sleepers are happy at home.
* The introvert, she is better. That would be me. The evening we got home, despite crummy sleep all week and the long drive, I spent a couple of hours by myself and was *wired* from doing so. Yeah, I'm still an introvert.

* I seem to be the one that is cooking around here. Which is our custom, but it's easy to get used to my mommy's cooking.
* No one picked up the mess we left.
* This routine is draining.

So how are things back at your ranches?


Sue said...

Glad you're settled back in esperanza. I can't believe no one cleaned while you were gone! How inconsiderate! Where are those Dust Buffalo Fairies when you need them anyway????

AW: Sunday's worship was an exercise in hilarity. The music director and I were having tea in my office an hour before worship and we changed, well, pretty much everything in the service.

AW: Virtually everyone in every pew had that "Head-Tilted-What-Is-She-Going-To-Do-Next?" look. After a while I had to stop looking. A case of high-school giggles was approaching at break-neck speed. I also could not look at the music director, for the same reason.

W: Busy at the gym today (first world whine - I know) and like SO many others who haven't seen the place in a month of Sundays, I'm going to hurt big time tomorrow.

Days said...

Ah, to settle back into a sleep routine. Wonderful.

Long email, many attachments, lost to the deepest realms of Teh Interwebz, or wherever those e-mails which fail to send go. Bah.

No school til Thursday, which I didn't realize until after I had booked some appointments. Now to scramble to change those appointments, or to scramble to find childcare, that is the question.

I'll take some cleaning fairies too, while I'm at it.

Days said...

Sue - What fun!

esperanza said...

Cleaning fairies for all! And calendar fairies!

And I keep forgetting to thank Liz. I've said "oh for the love of fuzzy ducklings!" more times than I can count.

liz said...

You're very welcome!!

Anonymous said...

I am so pissed, my spouse just vetoed me posting on my blog about something so freaking innocuous that I just can't believe it.

It was like he was looking for something to fight with me about.


Sarah at ratatat said...

Fuzzy ducklings is awesome!

Esperanza - good luck with the return to routine. I feel so mean when I start enforcing our early bedtime again.

And way to start the year off with a bang, Sue.

Whine: Why does my car needs brakes now? After the ginormous car repair bill on my husband's car last month...let's just say we're not going to make a huge dent in the Christmas bills. Money sucks!

Antiwhine: I like my new job more than I expected.

kathy a. said...

yay, sleep! yay, fuzzy ducklings! yay for cleaning and calendar fairies! yay for sarah's new job!

go, sue!

days, i hate hate hate it when i lose something that's taken some time to put together. so depressing.

anonymous, got my cluestick at the ready.

W: one of those headaches. early meeting tomorrow. cat bark under the dining room table.

AW: made a baby quilt, and 1/2 of another. yay, babies! and i like doing the quilts.

AW: daughter learned the important life skill of working the circuit breaker.

amy said...

This is an apropos post title for the reason I came here right now. Heaven help me, I am blogging again.

I need this outlet. I need a place for just me -- no kids, no mom, no 800 FB friends. I hope I can maintain it, if for no other reason than for that.

margalit said...

Amy, I just started blogging again after an 18 month hiatus, and like you, it is more for me than for an audience. Not gonna post about kids, money woes, or negative thoughts.

Car got towed during "snow emergency" but cops were towing before there was an inch of snow.

Found a FREE dining room table and 6 chairs in great condition on Freecycle that is going to look awesome in my red dining room.

Sill not unpacked and have lost interest in finishing. So the living room is decorated in half unpacked cartons. Who is to say that isn't stylish, anyhow?

esperanza said...

Yay for free stuff! And for procrastination!

W: Did I say that we were back in a sleep routine? I think I forgot to tell Mini.

Sue said...

Yay free stuff! Yay fuzzy ducklings! (I've used the term twice this week, and it's only Tuesday...)

Cluestick time Anon...

kathy a wins for pet body fluids (though our cat likes to think of them as "gifts") for cat bark under the dining room table. Nice score for kitteh, not so nice for kathy.

kathy a. said...

i swear, i think my senior cat gives these gifts recreationally. she'll scarf down half a bowl of kibble, possibly with the malicious intent of depriving her inferiors; bark it up; lick her whiskers; and move on with her daily agenda of dominating the universe.

question for ms. demeanor: so, the breakfast meeting went well. but we were having a confidential conversation and chose a table way off in the corner, with 3 empty tables lined up next to us -- and this guy made me move my coat so he could sit at the very next table, less than a foot away. isn't there some kind of rule about leaving a table between if there are empty spaces nearby? [related to the airline rule about leaving the middle seat open if the flight's not crowded? or the restroom rule about stalls?]

Sue said...

W: Am having great difficulty deciding on a major change for 2011. Yes, Teh Hair. Because we all know it's all abou the hair. I'm considering soft whispy bangs. But it's such a big step. My inability to decide will likely mean that I will die without said bangs, but they do sound like a nice idea.

I have a very round face, and all of the hairstyle websites say that a round face is good with a bob (which I have) and with bangs brushed softly to the side (the cause of my indecision).

It's an enigma, my hair. No question.

kathy a. said...

sue, you have good hair. i say, do what moves you. i'm thinking of getting a professional trim myself. maybe the "whack it off with desk scissors when you feel like it" method is not my best look. but who knows? maybe it IS my best look....

oy, pixies. my cousin's daughter is still in ICU -- 2 weeks now, and 3 in the hospital. she had a tracheotomy yesterday, to get her off the respirator; she is still battling pneumonia. i'm just at a loss with this complicated situation; it is occuring to me now [and probably to my cousin] that she might not survive.

one of my sisters says, "you can't fix it," and that's true enough. but i can't stand back, either, and i don't know what to do but keep pumping love in their direction. maybe a quilt... which won't fix it, but will be something.

Sue said...

Oh kathy, so sorry to hear about your cousin's daughter. How frightening for all of you. Keep pumping the love - it may not feel like you're doing much, but you are. I've worked with people in terrible situations who have no one to love them through it, and it's such a sad thing to watch.

So, yes, go with the love. It may intangible, but it makes more difference than anyone could properly articulate.

liz said...

My son doesn't like peanut butter, tuna salad, chicken salad, or egg salad. Actually, he doesn't like mayo.

So far I've sent him to school with soup, bologna, hard-boiled eggs, left-over spaghetti.

What are your thoughts on my sending him with a bagel with lox and a schmear?

liz said...

(((Kathy A.))) I vote quilt. And dinners for the freezer. And doing laundry.

Also, maybe a Kindle, if she doesn't have one and if you can afford to get her one?

Moisturizer, since hospitals are kept very dry?

A gift certicate for a massage, while you sit with her daughter?

kathy a. said...

liz, a bagel, shmear, and lox is TOTALLY a legit lunch selection! so long as you are getting a variety of reasonably healthy food groups in there somehow, and he'll eat it [mostly], you're doing great.

i hate to tell you what-all i packed for my picky eater, back in the day. spaghettios shouldn't even count as food, but she'd eat them; also, lots of leftovers, soup. the wide-mouth thermos was my friend.

thanks for the good thoughts about my cousin and her daughter, pixies.

moisturizer's brilliant, liz! i might have put some in the big bag o' little gifts last week -- which she really loved, she didn't have much of a christmas -- but maybe not. aside from the dryness, everyone's washing hands all the time in the hospital. not sure she's up to mastering the kindle right now, but reading material is certainly a good idea.

liz said...

Oh the moisturizer front, do a care package of lotion, lip balm, and some kind of lozenges or mouth watering candy (ginger chews work well for this).

kathy a. said...

i think i need to get into my "poster lady" mode for cousin's daughter, and figure out ways to fancy up the ICU room. she can also use some nice hand stuff and lip balm, but that's about it -- nothing by mouth. and my cousin, she mostly needs to see people and feel a little normal.

emily said...

I cannot find normal paper towels (among the brands that I prefer). Everything is "select-a-size". The idea is that each individual towel is small and you can pull off one, two or three to fit the size of the job. Sounds nice, right?

But, in practice, it's impossible to casually pull off one towel. Since each towel is more than half a normal sheet, two towels is often overkill.

The cynic in me thinks that "they" make every other set of perforation less "holey" so a casual pull tears off two and the consumer *thinks* she is getting a deal (by being able to use the smaller single sheets) but ends up going through paper towels twice as fast.

I know--minor thing--but I *hate* when they mess with my stuff. (Don't get me started on the toilet paper!)

kathy a. said...

oooh, emily for old skool! [even though i love select-a-size and am unhappy when i can't find them.]

purple_kangaroo said...

Today was a doozy. Coming to terms with the fact that I really need to do more to try to find some resources and help for SPD issues beyond just the general child therapist/counselor person we're seeing.

The therapist had sent us to a neurologist for evaluation, but the neuro basically said there's no such thing as SPD and, although there's clearly something wrong with the child, she's neurologically normal and labeling her will only cause more harm to her in the long run and anything an occupational therapist would do won't really help anyway, so we should just keep doing what we're doing.

Sorry, doctor, but that's not cutting it. We need more and better tools than that. The child is almost 10 and time for early intervention is running out.

purple_kangaroo said...

((Kathy A.)) how very difficult and scary. Lots of love and a quilt sound like a good idea. I don't know your feelings/leanings on this, but in such a situation I like to make it a prayer quilt (for me it would be a crocheted blanket, though) and infuse it with all the love, prayers/good thoughts and care on your mind while making it, then include a note giving a brief idea of the number of hours or prayer (or positive thoughts, or whatever you prefer to call it) the blanket represents on their behalf.

purple_kangaroo said...

That should say "hours of" not "hours or".

FlutterBye said...

Just thought I'd update that things are going well on the spousal front. We're both in support groups that are very helpful (and the accountability is really helpful for DH, as well as the root issues and personal growth they're working on), we did have a polygraph and that was reassuring, and we found a counselor that we really like and think will be a good fit for us.

But there are huge unbloggable extended family stresses/issues going on. At least DH is showing himself very impressive at responding well to them, and has even used his own recent experiences as a talking point to encourage a loved one to face up to issues and own mistakes and be transparent and willing to do the work needed to make it right. And he is currently walking the walk he's talking and following his own advice, so he can say that with integrity.

esperanza said...

Thanks for the update, FlutterBye. Sounds good.

p_k, cluesticks available for doctors who don't want to--you know--doctor. Ugh.

Keep on whining, pixies. Awards tomorrow evening, maybe?

sue said...

Sounds good FB. I hope the good progress keeps up and the extended family stuff sorts out soon.

PK - ugh and double ugh to Cluestick University Doctors. I've some across several.

Whine: Can't. Fireplacing. Sleep.

Whine: Work starts in five hours.

Whine: Head hurts. Badly. Even if I wanted to go to the ER (which I don't) I would have to drive myself there (which I shouldn't do). Normally my son would take me, but he's in New York at a conference, which qualifies as a definite AW.

Sarah at ratatat said...

Oh Sue, hope the headache subsided. What misery.

KathyA - your poor cousin and her family. I like the idea of the skin care package - she might not be able/willing to step away long, but she can just apply lotions and lip balm at the hospital. I think just being there/continuing to visit will mean the most in the long run.

Emily - I was enamored with the select a size paper towel at first and crushed when we started buying Costco paper towels. We used the select a size over the holidays and I realized just how evil they were. (I will admit I liked them because I had a 2 and 4 year old, I think and I was the one who ripped the towel off carefully and gave it to them - if they had a chance they went through 9000 paper when they did it.)

Purple Kangaroo - hang in there. Hope you find the right doctor soon.

FlutterBye - glad to hear some things are better. Sorry for the unbloggable stresses.

Sarah at ratatat said...

Liz - lunches? Have you ruled out the school lunch? I hate making lunches with a fiery passion. And half the things on the school menu, my kids wouldn't eat if I serve it. But at school they eat at least as much as if I packed them a sandwich. (When I put it this way, I feel terribly wasteful of food and money. But I would whine every week about making school lunches)

And the bagel sounds fine. (Our school regularly offers pizza dippers with sauce as an entree so I don't think anyone would think a bagel wouldn't be enough)

kathy a. said...

oh, PK -- a neuro who doesn't belive in what your child is experiencing is certainly not helpful. (or maybe he was saying it doesn't fall into his specialty? but that's equally unhelpful. cluesticks!

flutterbye -- yuck on the extended family issues. glad things are moving along with hubby.

oh, sue. hope the headache is better.

on the burning issue of lunchboxes: they need not be traditional. the kids seemed to like variety -- mini-bagel sandwiches; wraps using a tortilla; cheese, crackers, and ham rolled up on the side; nuts as a protien offering; little tubs of yogurt, applesauce; anything that would fit in a thermos; veggies with a little dip.

my son would eat anything, so he was easy. with daughter, i resigned myself to the fact she was usually not going to eat it all -- best i could do was offer things she liked.

liz said...

Today makes 4 in a row of sending lunches. Today's lunch was completely prepared last night, ready to go for this morning's 0645 departure for school to go to morning fit club.

So here's the question: are Thursdays going to always be sandwiches? Any ideas for foods served cold or at room temperature to send with a picky (no mayo, no mustard, no lettuce, no tomato, no olives, no pickles -- but sushi is terrific) eater?

liz said...

Also, no peanut butter and no jelly.

amy said...

I hope it's not too late to whine.

I got the carpet cleaned a week and a half ago, so you know that yesterday the cats barked in four places and today, the tot spilled her protein drink (smells like off-milk already) and tater knocked my coffee off the end table -- both firsts in this house. I hate my carpet so much. I'm tired of cleaning cat pee and bark and still smelling it all even though everyone who comes over (everyone I trust to tell/ask, that is) swears they can't smell it, but we don't have the money to put in hard wood floors right now.

Part or most of the reason we don't have the money, in spite of the new job my husband has that pays him more money (AW!!!) is that the tot has to go back into therapy for eating disorder. The bully situation set off a major eating regression, and this week she's had some kind of viral fever that has led to her consuming fewer than 500 calories most days. She is a bag of bones. She complains of hurting all the time and being cold. She has no energy, and with the exception of her deep, dark circles under her eyes, she is gray.

The only bright spot is that we're going to start up with a therapist we know and love for the anxiety, and she's helping us find occupational therapists for the food stuff and sensory processing problems.

I'm so overwhelmed. I know we have to do it or risk losing her entirely, but the money and the coordination and getting past the previous bad OT experience is just a bit too much to cope with right now.

amy said...

Liz, I second the suggestion for nuts as a protein. Unless his school is nut-free, what about a trail mix? He could even help make it. When the tot is eating, I find she'll eat more of something from a mixed bag than if the items were separated.

kathy a. said...

((( amy ))) yay for the good therapist! breathe, sister. step at a time. xoxoxo

you know, between the bullying and being sick, it's not so surprising she is off her feed, so to speak. it makes tons of sense to shore her up against the anxiety -- and hopefully the rest will follow along. eating problems are so hard -- applying pressure there usually backfires.

your carpet follies definitely are prizeworthy!

liz said...

(((amy))) Sending hugs so hard you'll squeak.

Sue said...

Oh amy, tons of hugs from here too. Just lots of hugs.

AW: Starting to feel almost human. I could use a nap and my head still hurts, but I'm down to about 6/10 which is tolerable in my perception of the universe.

W: How sad is that anyway???? That 6/10 pain isn't that bad.... that's harsh.

AW: My son is in New York at a great conference re: modern feminism. Today he had a meeting in the Empire State Building!!!! with the national office of Planned Parenthood. I am one proud Momma today. Ok, everyday, but today especially.

amy said...

Thanks, pixies. <3

Kathy, can I just thank you for offering the phrase "off her feed"? I come from a family of horsepeople, and we use that phrase all the time, with animals or people. It's just perfect for exactly what's happening.

Things are going to get better, but it's scary, you know?

kathy a. said...

((( amy ))) yes, i know! you're doing all the right things, though. for what it's worth, i'm 100% in favor of the milkshake diet if that's what appeals to her. whatever works without anyone freaking out. xoxo

Sarah at ratatat said...

Amy, I'm sorry. This must be so scary and frustrating. Hugs and if at my house, a stiff drink.

Milkshake diet - mmmm. If only that could be packed in Liz's son's lunchbox.