Friday, August 8, 2008

Prizes! Triple-twisting Whineblaster Edition

This week’s awards are brought to you by C@n@d@’s W0nd3rl@nd, where I got blasted, twirled, and drenched on Monday.

The Lazy River Award goes to KLee, for skinned knees and bruises while tubing in a low-flow drought-stricken creek. So sorry, honey! I'm passing the Polysporin.

The Action Movie Stunt Coaster Award goes to Elizabeth, who is caught in the crossfire at work. Keep your seat-belt tightly fastened and your hands inside the car, please.

The Black Hole Water Slide Award goes to Margalit, since that is where her rent money has gone. (“We don’t help people anymore”? What kind of sentence is that? Can you even say that in English?)

The Wave Pool Award goes to esperanza and Uccellina as they continue to put up with the pumping action of their mechanical buddies.

A visit to the Internet Café for the Sweet Baboo, who is newly wireless! Welcome to the 21st century, little one.

Our sympathy to Sue, who has endured another week in the (not so) Fun House with the crazy mirrors, sliding floors, mazes in the dark, and oh, the headache. The headache. Hugs and massages, Sue.

Neighbor Lady must have been looking in those crazy mirrors when she cut her own hair. Hooray for Neighbor Guy, who saved the day when a Paid Professional failed to. It goes without saying that teh LICE gets teh Whine of Substance Award for this week. And last week too, retrospectively.

More hugs to Amy, with mounting pregnancy discomforts, and Sarah, who is just tired of being stuck waiting in a really long line for the best ride in the amusement park. The signpost says “48 day wait from this point.”

Elevated Risk of Mullet Award, for the best single sentence in a Wednesday Whine, goes to kathy a.’s comment on Elizabeth’s internal politics whine:
“if only it was lice, and the drugstore had something for it.”

Best Anti-whine Award also goes to kathy a., for:
“all the cat barf has been easy to clean up.”

And . . . that's it for this week. Join us next week when the award-whining kathy a. is our host.

Get it, get it? Award-WHining? I crack myself up. Stop me before I pun again.


Uccellina said...

Wow, I won and I didn't even whine! Woohoo!

kathy a. said...

oh, madeleine. this is one stylin' award ceremony!

uccellina, every one of us who has ever met a breast pump [and/or even contemplated the wonder of twins] thinks you are an understated hero.

esperanza said...

You've outdone yourself, Madeleine. I'll just imagine myself in the wave pool from now on...

Madeleine said...

Thanks, guys. You made it really easy, actually. When KLee posted about tubing when I'd just been to a water park . . . synchronicity, as the Police would say.

KLee said...

Thanks, Madeleine! I would post pictures of the Picasso that is my right leg, but bruises just don't translate well to film. Trust me, they're lurid.

Man, if it only had been a Lazy River instead of a descent into hell.

kathy a. said...

omg, how are we going to top "lurid" next week????

Sue said...

*applause applause*

Great awards Madeleine!