Thursday, July 30, 2009

Sue Awards!

Hello pixies and welcome to a very special event. It's the Sue Awards. Yes, in honor of her exceptional performance in two categories this week, I've decided to name the whole awards ceremony in Sue's honor. Also, she's off on vacation on Saturday, and if anyone deserves their own awards ceremony and then a vacation, it is Sue, she of the four funerals in two weeks.

First, of course, Sue dominates the Stylish Whines department, with her ode to The Rain that Never Ends.

Liz nominated Sue for a Mullet award, but frankly she had so many great lines this week that I don't know which one Liz had in mind. A few of my favorites . . .

Wearing socks to keep your feet warm in July is highly unfortunate.
Why are people asking me about tiny church sandwiches and pickles???
I didn't make it past the woefully ugly scarf summit.

Old Skool Awards to esperanza, who drove 15 miles to a fruit stand for produce that tastes just like the grocery store stuff (I've done that, too! I always suspect they are buying it from a distributor and packaging it up to look local) and to amy, who says "When I was five, I never imagined I'd wish for electrolysis."

Maternal Angst Award to kathy a. as her daughter prepares for a year abroad. Bonus Remembering What it's All About (Life Changes Division) Award for the return of the visitor she thought she'd never see again.

4 – 3 – 2 – 1 Award to Elizabeth, whose website is launching on Friday with or without the Communications person on site.

Good Pet Mommy Award to Purple Kangaroo, courtesy of the animal control officer sent by her creepy neighbor.

The cluestick posse is armed with pickles this week and is headed in the direction of Sue's congregation's less helpful helpers.

Love, hugs, and magic pixie dust to esperanza. Sorry to hear that butt-on-couch is no longer a pleasant diversion but once again a necessary precaution.

WAIT, breaking news! The cluestick posse has been diverted in esperanza's direction to deal with a clueless ultrasound tech with terrible bed-side manner. She thinks you need to worry for 24 hours longer? What the?!?

Thank you to amy, for introducing us all to the source of the funniest t-shirt ever.

And thank you all for playing along with the comic book character meme! Next week, the delightful Liz will be our shoulder to whine on.


Liz Miller said...

Esperanza, I'm definitely gonna wallop that ultrasound tech with both a cluestick AND extra-sour garlic pickles. The kind that are bigger than Ahnold's forearm.

Madeleine, I was particularly thinking of the ugly scarf summit, but you pretty much captured the glory that is Sue this week.

kathy a. said...

yay, sue! and madeleine, wonderful awards! love the pickle posse!

esperanza, my cluestick is aimed upstairs from the tech -- they need to have a doctor around to explain NOW. many hugs, and i hope you have some silly comedies or any other distraction that makes you laugh, for tonight. xoxo

Sue said...


Thank you, thank you, thank you. I am honoured! Wow - a whole award show for little ole me!

Really, thank you pixies. You've helped me get through a really tough month. And now, I am mere hours away from the start of HOLIDAYS!!!!! Yay!!!

((((esperanza)))) do take care, 'kay?

esperanza said...

Well, fireplace it all. My doctor is out of town (of course), but received a phone report from the radiologist (where was he/she when I was demanding a report??). My doctor then called her nurse who called me with the unwelcome news that I'm on "complete bed rest" at least until the doctor comes back Monday to look at the actual ultrasound pictures.

I am beyond whiny and have degenerated into sobbing, which I'm pretty sure is not in the "complete bed rest" protocol.

Thank you for your good wishes and magic dust and cluesticks. It means more than I can say.

kathy a. said...

(((((( esperanza )))))) sprinkling more pixie dust here and there. xoxoxo

Sue said...

Oh esperanza, I'm so sorry to hear that. Sending prayers, pixie dust, and plenty of good energy your way...

Liz Miller said...

esperanza, I am sending you several things.

1) Tales of Mere Existance: Saturday

2) And the same cartoonist on

3) One Man Star Wars

4) A recent cover of Christine Lavin's "Regretting What I Said"

Madeleine said...

esperanza, I'm pretty sure that sobbing *is* in the complete bed rest protocol, sadly. I've got the lotion-infused tissues and a cool drink for you. Also Mary Poppins is on her way over to play with the Sweet Baboo.

If laughing at other people's stupidity would lift your spirits, I recently stumbled into a black hole called Not Always Right. Not: Not Safe for (Anyone With) Work (To Do).

Madeleine said...

That middle "not"? Needs an E. E like esperanza!

JennyMac said...

This looks like so much fun...and that tee IS quite funny.

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