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Wednesday, September 5, 2007

Whining: the post-Labour Day edition

It's Back! To! School! for us this week. My please-god-let-it-end whines are less about summer vacation itself (we had a pretty good time) and more about the capacity of my child for anticipatory anxiety. The wailing at bedtime for the past few nights has been nuts. Probably developmentally appropriate and all, just nuts. Because the chances that she’ll fail second grade because she doesn’t have a red marker are fairly low.

We went marker-shopping last Friday, which freed us up to move on to the real worries. The chances that she’ll have a mean kid in her class are somewhat higher than the second grade failure rate. And my guilt that I didn’t find better ways to deal with her mean-kid experiences last year is, you know, huge. Nothing beats finding out over the summer that the reason she didn’t eat much lunch last year was because the kid across the table was kicking her, so she just wanted to get outside as fast as possible.

Things will be a blur once I pick her up today, so I’m going to open up the whiner’s ball and save my First! Day! of! School! whines for later. Those of you who are a week or so in can feel free to remind me that the drama will die down. And those of you without kids can feel free to complain about how much worse the traffic is now that all those darn students are back.

50 comments:

Liz Miller said...

(sob!) I missed MM's first morning of kindergarten because I had to leave too early so that I could make it to my 9 AM class.

(sob!)

Anti-whine: "Are you a little bit nervous about Kindergarten?"
"No. I'm all-over nervous."

Anonymous said...

Madeline- mean girls, ugh. I really never dealt with them until Mallory entered high school. Here's hoping there are none in your daughter's class.

Whine: Someone posted on their blog with a link to mine: "But then there's this one. Terribly written, kind of boring, clearly exaggerated for "comic effect", but I kind of love it."

I know she "kind of loves me" but come on, do I need that kind of love?

I agree with everything she wrote, but really why would you point out someone's short comings publicly? Someone you don't know? Someone who could trace the links back to you?

I am really not looking for reassurance here, so I don't need a bunch of "you don't suck" comments. I just had to vent, and I can't vent to real life people, because they would go, what blog?

So I am whining, pixies.

Anti-whine: Chocolate on my desk for the first day of school! Bert has an interview tomorrow. Mace had his kindergarten home visit and was great. He didn't once mention his parent's shortcomings. Lin and Rory had a great first day and Mallory only "half hates" high school, so that must mean she half likes it.

Scrivener said...

I don't have time to really write my whine because I have to pack my bag in the next ten minutes and then get the kids to Ella's school for open house & the first PTA meeting and then rush straight from that meeting to the airport to fly to Florida so that when my brother gets out of jail he isn't sent to a homeless shelter but is taken to a group home.

Antiwhine: Hopefully once I get home late on Thursday night there will be no more drama with my brother for at least a few months. Hopefully.

KLee said...

Argh. First Day. I feel like I've been run over by a steamroller. My body is tired and achy all over.

My new classroom location is directly outside the Sewage Lift Station for the entire southern section of my city. When we lined up to go to lunch, the ground was already mucky with backup from the school toilets. Good times, I tell you.

Offspring started middle school, and came home with a headache from carrying around all that crap in her bookbag. (I will post her First Day pic on my place later.)

Madeleine said...

OMG! Sewage! Early lead for that one, KLee!

Phantom Scribbler said...

OK, Lisa, but now that you've vented and we've all had a chance to check Technorati, can I just say? She ain't exactly Shakespeare herself.

((((Liz))))

Miranda said...

((Scrivener))

Liz Miller said...

(((Scrivener)))

KLee, I think raw sewage on school property may be in the running for somekind of lifetime whining achievement award.

S. said...

Ah, Scriv! But he's getting out, right?

Whine: 5:20 alarm, and it's not even mine.

Anti-whine: Dropped Z. off on time! Starting the year right!!! (Yes, I know this is a pathetic accomplishment, but it *is* all mine.)

Madeleine said...

Three cheers for starting the year right, even when that means you need to be at your own class on time. Go Liz! Go Sheila!

Anti-whine: SG's teacher is "soooooo nice!"

Whine: Tonight, at bedtime, SG said "I have nothing to worry about!" That sounds like an anti-whine, doesn't it? But she followed with "I like having something to worry about. It makes me happy. It's part of my bedtime routine." Uh, OK. Right.

Anonymous said...

((Scrivener))

My daughter's first day of first grade went fine. She said it was very great. This exceeds my expectations by perhaps 1000%. Why did I spend all day in the verge of sobbing. I put in "Love Actually" just so I could cry without over-thinking it. The movie is designed to tug the heart strings. I am not even sure I like it, but it did relieve the pressure from all of those pent-up tears.

Whine: I am in a new town. I need to be forward, social and friendly. I am feeling anti-social, which is dumb because then I will be lonely ll fall. But it just seems so hard to reach out. I don't have high social needs, I just am not happy being a complete hermit. I spent most of the day wishing to be near all of the people I have known for a minimum of 7 years and hopefully closer to 12. And was I able to make myself call any of them? No. God, I hate my own phone issues.

Now just preschool orientation to get through for my son. More people for me to be afraid of.

Miranda said...

My baby son started high school today. His day sounded pretty awful but he was happy he survived. The other baby son started first grade today. He loves his new school, his new school, and his many new friends. After last year, it's good to see him excited about school.

Anti-whine: I have a shiny new Macbook. And an iPod. I love Apple's ed discount.

Seeking healthy vibes: Youngest son has a specialist appointment tomorrow. His asthma is getting worse but I think this visit will help get things on track. He hates to play outside unless he has the inhaler handy and we can't bring the inhaler to school until his physician completes the appropriate form.

Liz, I had to leave early today for school too. Plus I couldn't be there when they got home. I feel like a terrible mother.

Madeleine: The girly wars are so hard. My daughter has been on all sides and it hurts every which way from my perspective.

Lisa: Hee! on the "half-hating."

KLee: You certainly have my vote for "Worst Workplace EVER."

kathy a. said...

hugs to madeline, liz, lisa, scrivener, sarah, and everybody.

klee is the clear front-runner so far for some kind of award, with back to school sewage. ick!

((( scriv )))) you are a good dad and brother.

sarah -- years ago, i read an interview of a supreme court justice, and he said something like, "you know, your best friends in life end up being the parents of your children's friends." that was true for us, for a lot of years at least. maybe these new school beginnings are also the start of some good friendships.

in a stunning development, i have no whines this week. finished a phase of a big project. will not be launching the younger child to college for more than a week yet. all is good.

kathy a. said...

miranda, hope the specialist appt. is good! my son had asthma. some preventive meds made a big difference -- he was always pretty active. [but it is good to have the inhaler, just in case.]

Jenevieve said...

...sigh.

I can't even express how whiny I feel.

Anybody want a blueberry bran muffin? Warm out of the oven!

If only the other bun would get out of the oven, now.

Madeleine said...

Thanks for the sympathy, everyone -- it's actually the boys who bother Snuggly Girl more at this point. It's a kicking-poking-teasing issue. Though there's a little bit of "this girl won't let my friend play with me" thrown in, too. I think she'll be OK.

Other than the fact that she showed up in my room 20 minutes before my alarm to announce she had the worst dream ever. "I'm not exaggerating!" she said. I told her to go to sleep and tell me about it later, so I don't know what it was. She didn't seem all that freaked out, actually, just wanting a snuggle. Hence her nickname.

KLee said...

Thanks for all the commiseration, everyone. To be fair to my school, though -- the sewage facility is owned and maintained by the city, so it is not the school's fault. Though I *would* like a chance to talk to the bonehead who thought putting a sewage lift station on the grounds of an elementary school was a good idea.

I wore Crocs to school yesterday (a comfort issue, since I knew I was going to be on my feet all day) and I came home and bleached those bad boys.

Let's hope that our principal has notified the city of the backup, and they'll be out soon to sort things out. I DO NOT want to have to deal with that again today.

Sue said...

Wow. Early points for KLee - sewage always gets top prize billing in my view. Ewwwww....

(((Liz)))

(((Scriv)))

Girly wars are the suckage, yes?

Whine: Depression worsening. Headaches worsening. Not sure which came first, or which worsened which, but who the hell cares? I feel like something the cat brought up.

And it is my first day back at work after an eight week leave (during which I was hoping to resolve both the headache and depression issues. Not. So. Much.)

Anti-whine: New pens.

a/k/a Nadine said...

Klee, all I can say is EEEW.

No major whines for me this week. Just the normal, to-be-expected apprehension at the prospect of how much work will be required for the classes I'm taking this semester.

Well, that and the on-going attempt to acquire textbooks for said classes. Still have 3 remaining...

I wish someone would leave chocolate on my desk!

Jenny F. Scientist said...

(((Scrivener)))

Sewage! YUK! Not. Okay.

I am... whiny. And kind of down for no reason. Anxious all the time. Grr.

Did I mention that a yellowjacket stung my broken finger? Which apparently they can't do anything about, sorry, it'll just hurt for maybe a year. (The break, not the bee.) Grr all around.

Jenny F. Scientist said...

And did I mention, the undergrads are back. Whiny entitled rich-kid brats! My favorite!

Sue said...

Ouch!!! Jenny F that sounds awful. The bee sting on the broken finger sounds bad too. HeeHee. Darn brats.

Elizabeth said...

Whine. D's bus has been about 1/2 an hour late both days so far. This is both a hassle in and of itself and a real problem for getting N to preschool on time. And none of the other kids were at the bus stop this morning, so we couldn't ask them to watch D while we took N to preschool. I took him for today, but I can't work from home every day.

Yankee T said...

Whine About No Whines

Two college kids are having fun,
The high school girl is great.
September seems to calm the sun,
I have the perfect mate.

My job is going well for me,
Attorney's work, for her.
The soccer season brings us glee,
YD's the star, yessir

So quit the whining, you may say
Howcome the Yankee's cranky?
Because it's whiny Wed-nes-day
I want that style prize. Thanky!

Madeleine said...

Elizabeth, I feel you on the first-week bus blues. I hope it works out soon.

Jenny, I knew someone would bring the bratty undergrads :-) That's terrible about your finger, twice over.

Sue, Sue, Sue. So sorry to hear that the headaches and depression are ganging up on you.

BroccoliEater said...

First day of school. Bus comes at 7:00. Kids accustomed to later rise time in the summer. School age kid not accustomed to having to wear school type clothes.

Hilarity ensues.

Primo is *this* close to losing a front tooth. He can smile with it hanging over his lip while the rest of his teeth don't show, creating an awful image that makes my skin crawl. Eeewww. I hated loose teeth when I had them, I now have nightmares about my teeth loosening, crumbling, and falling out, and watching it happen to someone else isn't much better. I thought my issues with puke were bad enough but the teeth thing may be what finally gets me!

kabbage said...

Even though I spend much of my days cleaning up after cats and dogs (pet sitter), KLee's sewage at work is much, much worse.

Whine: I've been trying for months to motivate myself to come up with a class outline for a dog-related course I want to teach. I'm qualified to teach it, I just need to get past my fear of success and write and teach the darn thing!

Minor whine: I mixed up dog food bowls yesterday which means the dogs got the wrong nutraceuticals. Sleek's supplements are designed to keep her from leaking urine all over the place. The real whine is why does it only take a couple of hours for her system to go haywire and a couple of days for it to get back into equilibrium and her to dry up again?

Antiwhine: my sitbones have accepted that we bike ride again and have stopped screaming, even when on the bike.

Mykal said...

Why does the crazy lady next door think that 7am on a Sunday morning is an ok time for a doggy playdate? One extra dog over there, meant FIVE dogs, running around and barking at 7am. I just want to sleep in. I can't wait until it's cold out and I can stop sleeping with the windows open, oh how quiet it will be!

Addtional whiny, whine of something I hate to admit that I think about. I swear I am the only person to start biking to work every day and not lose any weight. I've logged nearly 400 miles on my mtn bike this summer (that's not counting the 800 miles I've put on my road bike) and I have not lost a single pound. I eat well, I'm extremely fit (I've biked over 1200 miles this summer and the biking season isn't even over.) But still I'm slightly overweight. I need to just accept it, but I'm not quite there yet.

Uccellina said...

Oh-so-minor-whine: Had to gently explain to Husband that the proper response to my pregnancy symptom whines is not "Don't be ungrateful."

Antiwhine: Ultrasound this morning. One baby waved at the camera, and the other baby was sucking its thumb. I think I died from cuteness, but I'm better now.

Liz Miller said...

GAH!!!! I thought we had no labs this week because of Labor Day's labs being cancelled (we usually do all or none here)!!!

But we DID have lab and I missed yesterday's Cell Structure and Function Lab! Gah!!

Queen of West Procrastination said...

((Scriv))

Lisa V, I tend to have a lot of problems with back-handed compliments.

Sarah: I'm sending you hugs, because I've been there. Not with the kids going to school, but with those same feelings of being in a new town and being so nervous around people.

KLee -- eeeeewwwww. I am far too paranoid to even imagine working around sewage.

Whine of Dreading This Semester: So, I'm about a month behind on my comps reading and, while realising that I really have to buckle down and get work done before my giant exams this semester, I got my TA assignment. This semester, I'll be fulfilling 100 of my 122 hours, teaching four courses. Four crazy, outside-of-my-field courses.

Anti-whine 1: That's going to be a lot of money!

Anti-whine 2: Next semester will be a breeze, considering the fact that I'm getting all of my comps and almost all of my teaching duties out of the way in the same semester.

Whine: I think I'm going to go insane. Or stop sleeping.

Anonymous said...

I am just sitting here smiling about Uccellina's ultrasound. Waving and sucking thumb. Aww.

Can I whine in advance about going to the PTA meeting at the new school this afternoon? Is it even good for me to torture myself with this? I keep telling myself it is, but I am doubting my own credibility :)

kathy a. said...

cranky yankee wants
the style prize; how can one mess
with so much success?

Madeleine said...

Liz, oops. I hate when that happens.

Madeleine said...

and tee hee for kathy a.'s poem for YT!

What am I going to do with you, YT? (In my weekly-host capacity, I mean.)

Your verse is impeccable,
But your whine not regrettable.
And this rhyme is just heckle-able.

Uccellina said...

Madeleine - how 'bout "execrable?" Not that your rhyme really deserves that label, but it's a pretty great word and it would fit :-)

Daniela said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

I have nightmares about losing teeth too, sara. Only I never minded having loose teeth as a kid.

I also have nightmares about the girls who were so mean to me in 5th grade.


My actual whine: Some of you may know that I left academia 9 months ago. So why is that I find myself revising a manuscript from my dissertation today? It makes me so cranky that the sqvirrel went out and bought me some sour skittles to make me feel better (there's two anti-whines in there). But really, I'd prefer just to have the sour skittles without the whine-induction.

Anonymous said...

A vote for Sue and a "my husband and your husband were separated at birth" to uccellina. (I've also said "don't be ungrateful" myself).

I seem to be whine-free this week. Not sleeping as much as I'd like, but I probably shouldn't whine about 8 hours a night.

Daniela said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Madeleine said...

Thank you, Uccellina. "Execrable" is perfect.

I'm waving at your uterus. Your husband gets a different gesture. ;-)

QWP -- wishing you luck surviving this semester. Do the pixies need to send a cluestick for your department schedulers?

Uccellina said...

In fairness to my husband, I should add that when I explained the not-okay-ness, he totally got it and apologized. And he's generally fantastic.

Susan Anne MacKenna said...

Oh Sarah - hugs to you for the new-to-town blues. I hate that feeling! I've been here a year, and I still get it - I don't like dealing with other people where cliques have already formed. :(

Hugs for Scrivener; towels and bleach for KLee. Oy.

No real whines here. It's hotter than I'd like. I'm definitely uncomfortable. I feel bad griping about pregnancy whines. But still, they're there. Sighs.

We're too busy to think lately. I miss my husband!

Anonymous said...

I have a whine/antiwhine all wrapped up in one. Many of the pixies may recall that I had to miss Middle Daughter’s college commencement ceremony because it was scheduled on the same day as Dancing Girl’s high school graduation, and Small Famous Women’s college is located a mere 1000 miles from our home town (1018, to be exact). The college made DVDs of the entire weekend’s ceremonies available to the families of the graduates, so Bert ordered a copy for us. We watched it this weekend.

I felt so blessed, because even though Small Famous Women’s College didn’t show all 600+ graduates receiving their diploma, I actually got to see MD cross the stage. SFWC awards diplomas by house, and MD’s former house began with the letter Z. Our surname does not, but it IS far enough towards the end of the alphabet to have made MD alphabetically the last member of her house, and thus, the final graduate from the class of 2007. The recording shows the beginning of the commencement ceremony, and then it cuts to showing the handful of seniors from MD’s house proceeding one by one across the stage, ending with MD as she impulsively hugged the college president after getting her diploma, almost knocking her over in the process.

The entire viewing experience was bittersweet. It brought into focus exactly what I missed, but it also demonstrated the intimate connection MD formed at SFWC. I sat there with tears running down my face, proud and sad and happy all at once.

When MD finishes grad school I’m attending the ceremonies if I have to walk every step of the way. Besides, according to MapQuest, her grad institution is a whole 87 miles closer to us, so getting there should be a piece of cake.

NUD

kathy a. said...

oh, NUD. i'm sitting here crying tears of joy and longing, just hearing your description. i'm all aflutter about MD hugging the college president rather vigorously. i hope hope hope hope there are people who mean that much to my baby girl, as she flies off to college the end of next week.

Ancarett said...

Making it in just under the wire, may I whine about my older daughter's insane freakout over the past two weeks about school starting today? We've had almost no sleep and definitely no peace as she made herself sick to her stomach for days on end, worrying about it all.

Upside? She's over the moon, thrilled about everything at school, now.

Downside? I'm too tired to properly do all my work, as well as thoroughly rattled by her non-stop chatter from the time school ended until she went to bed at nine.

And I still have too darned many students in my classes. Someone scare them away or something, please?

Hugs to all the other pixies. I'm so tired, I can't keep my eyes open but I plan to come back, bright and early tomorrow, to actually read the comments in depth. Just a quick shout out of sympathy to Klee and Scrivener and a smile of understanding for Name Under Development and QWP.

Miranda said...

I feel like such crap right now. On one hand, I suspected a problem with Zilla and promptly took him to the immunologist.

HOWEVER, this kids has been really allergic to molds, pollen/ragweed, and dust for most of his life and *I never noticed.* It all makes so much sense now - the decreased activity, the huge difference his rescue inhaler has made in our lives for the past month - but I feel like I dropped the ball on this.

We are both still traumatized from the allergy testing. He screamed for ten minutes. It was awful. I was fighting back my own tears.

We also have to rethink the cat. She's six and not very cuddly. Her adoption chances aren't good so we are hoping that other changes will help him stay well before having to decide anything drastic.

I just wanted to drop off some fresh-baked chocolate chip cookies for the pixies. It's been a rough week for so many of you. (o).

kathy a. said...

many hugs to ancarett and miranda. and hugs to everyone else, too.

miranda, you just have to forgive yourself for not being omniscient, and move ahead. the allergies, they are tricky and sneaky little things. sometimes a few do-able changes make a big difference.

Unknown said...

Hugs and points to Klee (ewwwwww) and Scrivener.

I'm gonna whine and whine and whine. About my daughter. The GOOD one.

Whine: She had her tongue pierced without my knowing it. She's 15. It's illegal in our state. She won't tell me where, says she did it herself. How dumb does she think I am?

Whine: She ran up a HUGE texting bill, and instead of being honest, took my debit card and charged up the bill, thus ensuring that 5 other checks bounced at $35 a pop.

Whine: THEN I was on her facebook page today and saw that she and her scummy friend that I don't like had plans to get up early tomorrow, the first day of school, meet at the scummy pothead park, and have a toke before school. Um, totally caught her, called her friend's mom, and she's totally and completely grounded for life.

Antiwhine: New meds are working great for the Boy and he's back to being his normal strange but OK kid.

Antiwhine: Boy had a party Monday night at our house with a bunch of kids who were perfect angels. They took a TV out on the porch, played video games, layed down in sleeping bags on the lawn and talked, and had a great time. Not one snafu. And HE made dinner!

HUGE Whine: for those not in the Boston area, there was a large fire last weekend and two firefighters died. One was a family friend and the father of my son's close friend since 5th grade. This has hit us VERY hard, as there are a lot of things I can't share but the backstory is bad news. Funeral is Friday and it's going to be one of those huge ones with politicians, etc. My kid's first funeral.

Jenevieve said...

Oh Margalit, hugs and... um, more hugs. Man oh man.