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Sunday, May 8, 2016

Keep Calm and Carry On

Sending much love to all the Pixies facing stuff right now.  Last week's edition featured the most comments ever, so this week is starting early.

AW:  This doesn't roll around so often as one would like, but a nice dinner out with friends is really wonderful.

W:  Lingering albatross.  The one I meant to finish drafting this past week.  AW:  Didn't cancel the dinner out.

What's happening in your life? 


146 comments:

kathy a. said...

Happy Mother's Day to those who celebrate, and hugs to those who find this day more painful, for whatever reason. xoxoxoxo

Miranda said...

Heading on a jet plane to the capital on Tuesday. 6:14am to be exact. I need to clean my house for the sitters. I need clean underwear. I need to finish all the work things. I want a nap. And Netflix. And more naps.

Miranda said...

Next week I am also traveling and I'm just not that into it.

Thinking of all you today. Xoxoxoxo

Anonymous said...

Have time for meetup?

Liz on iPhone

kathy a. said...

Go for the meetup!

Queen of West Procrastination said...

Ooh, I hope there's time for you guys to meet up!

Over here, we're waiting and seeing whether Mr. Q's work sealing around the back door prevents further bee invasions. I'm really crossing my fingers, because I'm tired of playing catch and release! We had eight bees in here this weekend!

esperanza said...

I, too, need clean underwear.

Yes--Liz and Miranda meetup!

Packing with Baboos is...inefficient. Packing with Mr. E is...also inefficient. Let's just say I'm going to be plenty happy for them to go back to their routines tomorrow and leave me to my happy packing.

kathy a. said...

May the underwear fairy visit those in need. And all the packing go forward in peace.

kathy a. said...

And the bees decide that another place is a better place.

Queen of West Procrastination said...

I was about to anti-whine that we'd gotten pretty far into the evening without bees, when a bee got through, somehow. (That's nine, now.) Time for more foam sealant and weatherstripping.

esperanza said...

You are not making home ownership sound all that appealing right now, QWP. I suppose that's payback for my nightmare material last night :)

W: I am so tired and can't seem to feel rested. I'm ready for this moving to be done.

Semi-humorous moment: we were packing books in the Baboos' rooms today. Sweet takes after me, apparently: "pack it. No I won't want to read it. Pack it." Mini, on the other hand, takes after her Daddy: "Oh! Clifford! Don't pack Clifford yet! Oh! Curious George!" Sigh. It was slow going.

Queen of West Procrastination said...

Oh boy, am I glad that our last move (now that E has opinions about everything) was just one neighbourhood over, and that we could throw all of E's things into boxes on the last day. Because she is just like Mini and Mr. E, in that regard. "But I need it now!" I hope you can get better packing done when they're all away tomorrow, esperanza.

Anonymous said...

Neighbor Boy, at any time that we are trying to clean things out, "But.....no, keep that one.... I get attached...." .

NB starts back half days of school today. Headaches decreasing....and were mostly gone yesterday, without any reading, or any electronics, or anything physical since Wednesday... We'll see how a half day goes.... fingers crossed.

Yike, qwp, the bees!!!

--NL

esperanza said...

NL, I hope NB has a good day, pain free.

And there are more gems from Mini:
"Just because I haven't played with that toy in a little while doesn't mean I'll never play with it again."
"But that has good memories"

Too smart for her own good, that Mini.

Liz said...

Just wanted to tell you all how blessed I feel to have you as friends, and how grateful I am to have this space to share my troubles and joys, and to share in yours.

P_K said...

Well, it's Monday and he hasn't put the money back.

esperanza said...

Grrrr. (not at either of you. At "he")

esperanza said...

Right back atcha, Liz.

Queen of West Procrastination said...

There are not enough cluesticks in the world for that man.

(And Liz, right back at you, as well.)

Dare I anti-whine that we only saw one bee yesterday evening, and that we haven't seen any more since Mr. Q sealed everything?

kathy a. said...

Hope NB is feeling better today!

Yay for no more bees, QWP!

Love you, too, Liz!

PK, that stinks. What's next?

Liz said...

Dare we hope the words, "Contempt of Court" and "Go directly to jail to think it over" might be in your not-soon-enough-to-be-Ex's future?

kathy a. said...

YES, exactly what Liz said.

Anonymous said...

I hope the judge throws the book at him.

And, love you too Liz!
and this space and all of you!

--NL

p.s. still headaches, but around 2/10. Not too bad.

kathy a. said...

Glad things are better, NL!

P_K said...

I haven't heard back from my lawyer yet. Waiting not so patiently to see what's going to happen next. Still no money and nothing pending as of a little after 11am.

kathy a. said...

PK, fingers crossed that he is not as irrevocably stupid as he looks from here. xoxo

P_K said...

My H has a genius or near-genius level IQ. None of this makes sense. I think he just doesn't like being told what to do, or not being in control.

kathy a. said...

Boo hoo hoo, for him. He doesn't get to write his own rules in this setting. Maybe he'll explain to the judge how smart he is -- that should do the trick. (NOT!)

Afraid you are right about him being very controlling. All his astonishing behavior since the orders displays a firm belief in his own self, no matter what. Which is really unfortunate. xoxoxo

Liz said...

High IQ does not mean "isn't stupid", it just means high aptitude and capacity to learn and understand new material. Brilliant people can undermine themselves just as easily as dunces, maybe even more easily.

Your DH can't believe that he's not allowed to do what he wants when he wants. Hopefully the judge will make it clear to him.

esperanza said...

Oh, PK. I think you've named the control issues quite accurately, at least from my distant viewpoint. Continued prayers and hugs for you.

Not so patiently waiting here, too. Assurances from our realtor that funding will happen today. No confirmation from the parties with the actual money.

Queen of West Procrastination said...

I have to say that (speaking as someone who has spent too much time in academia) some of the most foolish and ridiculous behaviour I've seen has come from people with high IQs (which, as Liz has identified, just means they test well, and doesn't mean they possess all wisdom, although some believe that they do). I suspect (and hope), as Kathy stated, that the attitude that he can't be told what to do, and that he's smarter than everyone, will not play well in front of a judge.

Esperanza, I'm crossing all appendages that funding goes through today.

kathy a. said...

Esperanza, knocking wood that the money people come through today. Geesh. Does this mean you have yet to do the signing ceremony? (Well, that part isn't as bad as the waiting.)

PK -- One of the astonishing things is that your ex asked Just Last Week for the orders to continue for 2 more weeks. He had to have represented to the court that he would obey those orders. This could mean a perjury charge, if he promised under oath -- that's an actual criminal charge, not just contempt of court to rethink his actions in the refreshing environs of the county jail. Maybe the judge won't go that far -- but that's another risk in addition to the judge never believing him after he was caught with pants on fire.

xoxox

Miranda said...

Any updates on the house, Esperanza?

Any updates from the judge, p_k?

A. Nonnie Mouse said...

I accidentally watched all 13 episodes of Grace and Frankie, season 2, already. Darn that N3tfl1x!

esperanza said...

Nothing. I'm thinking we would have heard from the seller by now, if it hadn't funded. We had the signing papers party on Friday, this was just the actual transfer of the money. That should all happen on the same day, but...

I'm going to list all the things I've accomplished today, because I'm feeling like I didn't get much done: 3 loads of laundry, trip to big box store, trip to grocery store, small amount of work for next Sunday, bank errand, post office errand, picked up sticks in the yard, double batch of cookies, kept Baboos alive and fed and relatively content.

W: Why do I feel like I didn't get anything done?

Queen of West Procrastination said...

Esperanza, would you believe that I also didn't actually hear when the funds went through? I only heard when they didn't. (I technically still haven't heard that the funds have gone through, other than the fact that we pay our mortgage and all that!) And it's a good thing that you listed your accomplishments: it's hard to see that you've done a lot, when there is a lot more left to do.

ANM: I'm jealous! I haven't had a chance to watch any of it yet.

Knocking all available wood: still no bees. (I suspect that they're living in my deck, but I have no problem with that, so long as they have no way of getting inside when the door is closed!)

W: I finally got Mr. Q to go and buy a new sump pump (our old one is all rusted out), and it turns out that I picked the wrong kind. He's headed back to the hardware store. And there is an unacceptable amount of water in the sump hole, since someone procrastinated from replacing the pump for too long.

esperanza said...

Hm. So I'm just going to assume, with you QWP, that no news is good news.

I think I feel like I didn't accomplish much because everything I did today was just normal household management, like I do all the time. I did nothing toward packing or moving. And I'm probably not going to this evening. My feet are tired.

kathy a. said...

Esperanza, that's a LOT! It's just that your to do list is long; but most of those things won't have to happen tomorrow.

May the sump pump be viable.

Queen of West Procrastination said...

Poor Mr. Q has to go BACK to the hardware store (this is trip #3), because there's some sort of connector piece that we need. And a storm is brewing outside, meaning: the clock is ticking to get the sump pump replaced before we get a lot of rain. (I think we might have a thunderstorm tonight!)

Homeownership sure is exciting! (Am I getting you excited to own a home yet, esperanza?)

Sue said...

Love you too, Liz.

I hope the bees take a vacay QWP - a permanent one. Also sending good sump pump installation vibes.

Sending good packing energy, esperanza!! Wow - you got a LOT done today!!!!

NL, I hope NB's half days go well. Fingers and toes crossed for a good return to regular activity.

(((PK))) Un-fireplacing-believable. The only upside I can see is that his actions are digging him into a big legal hole that he won't be able to get himself out of - no matter how smart he thinks he is.

Sue said...

A Nonnie - Netfl!x is like that...you start a show, and next thing you know an entire day/week is gone. ;)

esperanza said...

QWP, in general there are no basements in this part of the world, particularly not in homes. So I'm neither jealous nor trepidatious (I would like extra credit for that word, though I can't figure out how to spell it) of your sump pump. I hope it functions properly, ASAP.

Queen of West Procrastination said...

It's done! We have a functioning sump pump! Now...only a million more projects around here to go.

kathy a. said...

We've never lived in a basement oriented location, either, so a sump pump almost sounds exotic. Glad it's working!

Esperanza, good luck on packing. Really, it will get done.

Liz said...

First world problems: MM's phone is doing that constant re-booting thing again. I took it to the Apple Store, waited an hour to be seen. They agreed it was an issue that was under warranty, and started the process to give us a new one aaaaaannnnndddddd their whole system went down. So I got sent home to wait for them to call to say the system's back up. Any takers on if that actually happens?

kathy a. said...

Apple's own system went down? I shouldn't be giggling... Of course they will make it right. But still....

Liz said...

Yep.

As MS texted,

Un
Be
Leave-able

kathy a. said...

PK, sending love, and hoping things are moving along. xoxox

esperanza said...

W of epically selfish proportions: My friend/colleague's family seems somehow unable to schedule a funeral service. Rumor had it on Saturday, but now the denomination has published something saying Tuesday, no time or place indicated on either day. It makes a difference re: Baboo sitters. Ugh.

kathy a. said...

That's not really a selfish whine. People want to pay tribute. Time and place are kind of important to that process. xoxo

esperanza said...

I can't imagine what's going on behind the scenes to cause this kind of delay. I don't really know...his parents are divorced, and he himself was divorced, so there may be some family yuck that they're navigating.

Anonymous said...

(((esperanza)))

W: NB's headaches are increasing again now that he is at school half days. Tomorrow is a day when he is scheduled to go back full time, and he was scheduled to go to a jazz competition that would have him leave with the band half an hour early, for a 45 minute bus ride, then music competition, master class, etc. and back at 9pm. We had already arranged to pick him up at the distant location around 5:30 instead, but are now thinking that he really should maybe rest his brain and skip it entirely. He had a guitar lesson today, and said that the chords (which are very hard) are taking him more time to process than normal, and he can't play things at the normal speed.....

He is going to be so very disappointed... but I think we will have to be the "bad guys".

I have not been at school (teaching) for the last three afternoons, so I really also need to start having full days again...

I am trying not to worry..... we are up to a 4 out of 10 in pain scale, and were told to expect ups and downs. But, this is hard, and I do worry.

sorry to be a downer.
-Neighbor Lady

p.s. p_k thinking about you lots....hoping all is as well as it can be for you

kathy a. said...

And, best that you are not intimately involved with all that mess, is my vote.

So, the tree guys are taking some trees down in my neighbor's yard. She didn't know until today that they were coming today, but she called and apologized in advance. She is recovering from back surgery! And her husband is 86 and having some confusion. Oy, a lot going on. So when I saw this strange huge black SUV sitting there in front of my house with music blasting and several people inside and the engine running, I went to inquire. A supervisor with the tree people was talking to them through the driver's window, and he said "we're working on the trees next door," and I said, "*They* aren't working on the trees next door" (I can be bitchy), and he said, "oh, but they're with the company." I mean, really? I said something vague, and they hung around a while longer to prove whatever, but they left when the actual work interfered with their spot on the street. Talk about personal whines...

kathy a. said...

((( NL ))) Oh, that sounds like way too big a day for NB, especially with his pain going up! The doc will probably back you up. So sorry. xoxoxoxo

kathy a. said...

* my previous comment was for Esperanza! NL, you unfortunately need to be involved with NB's sadness. xoxo

Queen of West Procrastination said...

That's so worrisome, NL! So many hugs for you and NB. I agree that it's a good time to be the "bad guys" and protect his recovery process.

W: water. in. the. fireplacing. basement.

It's limited to a small part, and thankfully, it works to our advantage that we have an uninsulated, wood-panelled basement, because cleanup will be easy. It's in exactly the spot that both the home inspector and the structural engineer identified as a place where we could potentially get seepage (because we need to build up the soil outside that part of the house, and it's by a damaged gutter). We haven't had a chance to deal with it yet, and thought it wasn't urgent because we had so little snow this winter. And then it rained.

BEFORE we discovered the water, I had my annual physical, and the doctor noticed that my heart rate is high. "Are you nervous a lot lately?" she asked. And then we had a chat about my anxiety levels, and all the things that have been going on. (Especially this month!) And then I returned home to a wet basement.

kathy a. said...

OK, you know the next project(s), QWP! But hope the doc had some recs about heart rate. And this too will dry out.

The fireplacing tree guys got back to work, and accidentally broke off a good-sized limb while trying to take down another limb on a rope. Whoopsie! I think it fell between the neighbor's house and the next house down... These are huge pines, planted 80-100 years ago, probably 100 feet tall and now suffering a bit from pine beetles. We had several sister pines taken out over the years. The neighbors got scared of them falling on the house.

kathy a. said...

* I guess the second branch accidentally breaking off is a sign that the tree really is suffering more badly than one can tell at a glance. We took the last sister pine out a few years ago, after a branch just lost it and kinda partly fell on the neighbor's porch. This whole row of pines was planted as a windbreak for a nearby quarry operation, now long gone.

esperanza said...

Oh no QWP!

NL, it definitely sounds like a time to be mean mom and have NB stay home from the fun. :(

sorry about the tree guys causing neighborhood trouble, kathy a

I am *very* glad not to be intimately involved in the planning of this funeral. I was, however, saying to some preacher-friends today, "I guess you know you're a preacher at heart when you are composing a funeral sermon in your head that you will never preach."

Liz, did Apple ever get back to you?

Sue said...

esperanza, I'm glad this is isn't your problem to deal with and I totally understand why you are frustrated with the less-than-clear plans. I've had two occasions recently where I attended a funeral without having any part in the service. I, too, wrote a sermon in my head.

NL, I agree, you will have to be the bad guy here. 4/10 doesn't sound good, plus NB wouldn't really enjoy the day that much if he were in pain, right?

Sorry about the water trouble QWP. Ugh. We had a wet basement in our last house - our stress level went up every time it rained.

Liz, I hope Apple gets back to you really soon.

That's kind of upsetting about the tree branches falling in your neighbourhood kathy. Aren't the professional tree people supposed to *avoid* that kind of thing???

Thinking of you PK and hoping you are okay.

Anonymous said...

ugh, esperanza, about the basement. But, the gutter thing and soil maneuvering are not too huge in the scheme of fixes....especially if Mr Q can install a sump pump (IMPRESSIVE!!!)
:)
In our last house we had seepage areas, but it's amazing what you can get used to over time and with a shelf with a 3 inch clearance above the floor. :)
Liz-- how frustrating about apple.
(Kathy)-- sorry about limbs falling.
Thanks all for the support.

--Neighbor Lady

p.s. he's skipping the competition and just going for a full day of school. taking it in stride pretty well for a kid who's been without tv of any sort for about a week now

esperanza said...

NL, I hope NB has a good day at school and feels ok when he gets home.

AW: Funeral finally scheduled, at a time much better for me, but it is ELEVEN days after the poor man died. That is a much longer lag than I'm accustomed to. Strangely, his family is not consulting me :)

Today is "Disappearing Items from Baboos' Rooms" day. Little packing but some cleaning out. And I found Giraffey, Mini's lovey. He'd been missing for a week or so.

kathy a. said...

Yay, Giraffy! And sorting! Glad the family finally got it together about planning, Esperanza.

NL, also hoping the day goes well for NB. Good idea about skipping the competition! (Even though that might make him a little sad.)

The tree removal is continuing apace. The first tree is down, but 2 more to go -- smaller and fewer branches, so hopefully they'll go more quickly.

P_K said...

My lawyer keeps giving STBX more chances and extensions. He did put back the most recent smaller withdrawl (the one that happened after the last hearing) finally, this morning. I'm so frustrated.

esperanza said...

Oh, PK. I'm glad to hear from you, but sorry it's more frustrating news.

kathy a. said...

PK! That is frustrating -- but I am glad he at least put that much back. AND, he's still gonna stink at the next hearing. In a week, right?

Putting some back leaves you some financial security. It does NOT change the fact he took a lot out before and has not restored that; he took this part out and didn't put it back swiftly upon demand, and *only* put it back because he was caught; he has left bills unpaid, and you with no way to know whether some have been paid; he has violated terms of visitation; he sent some person into your house to get things, when you were not there and did not give permission; he's trying to get you out of your house, while spending freely and committing to a year lease. Not to mention the original stuff -- he wrote fantasies about you dying, presumably gave them to someone, and TOLD your kids! These are just the parts you mentioned; there is surely more.

As a few have mentioned, there are not enough cluesticks.

xoxo

Liz said...

(((PK))) Your STBX stands in need of a colonic irrigation using sriracha and wasabi.

(((NL & NB)))

No, Apple never got back to me, I had to call them, got the phone switched, but now he has my contacts on his phone, so we need to work that out.

Queen of West Procrastination said...

Liz's summation of PK's STBX situation is both apt and mullet-worthy.

Esperanza, good job on getting things sorted, and on finding Giraffy.

AW: the basement is drying out, and we haven't had an further water!
W: we've discovered that whoever first set up the sump pump system hooked it up to the sewer line, which is both a big no-no, and puts us at risk of backflow. So: more work.

Also, there's snow in the forecast. Good news for all the wildfires, weird news for us (especially considering that we were heavily using AC last week). At least the plague of bees prevented us from planting our garden last week.

kathy a. said...

I'm sorry, but did you just say record heat followed by SNOW, both in MAY?

Seconding Liz for Mullet.

Sue said...

Liz has made a perfect summation of the STBX situation. So many hugs PK.

QWP - Ah, the May snow storm - gotta love it! I still have my snow tires on, but they are set to be switched out next Thursday. Hopefully the snow will have come and gone by then.

Sue said...

Yay for finding Giraffy, esperanza!!!

Liz said...

I just successfully kept myself from saying something snarky on Twitter!!! Where's my tickertape parade?

kathy a. said...

Virtue is its own reward, Liz. Or, you know, who needs a flame war?

P_K said...

I just got the "you aren't my only client and this isn't an emergency, so I'll get around to it when I get around to it" lecture from my lawyer. :-/

Anonymous said...

Cluesticks to the lawyer too!
And, it is an emergency! (bills to be paid, safety to ensure!) arg! Well, when the bill comes around from the lawyer, that "won't be an emergency" for you either, will it? ;)

Also, yay Giraffy.

NB has been doing well-- headaches lower than yesterday-- knock wood. Hit a wall (not literally, OMG!) about not being able to do anything, pretty much, so Neighbor Guy allowed him to shoot some baskets in the driveway, with NG retrieving all bounce-aways (so no running for NB) and ensuring no rebounds hit him in the head (banish the thought!). He is in a much better mood now. Missing the jazz competition was a good call, I think.

and lastly, SNOW?!?!
eek!

Good luck sorting contacts, liz!

-Neighbor Lady



P_K said...

Well, there is enough money in the other accounts to cover short-term expenses, so it isn't an emergency in that sense.

kathy a. said...

((( PK ))) Think you should breathe, and although your lawyer might deserve a couple cluesticks for delivery of message -- it isn't actually an emergency at this moment, because she forced him to put (at least the latest) money back. That there is a victory!!

And I swear, the STBX is still gonna smell really bad next week, too.

xoxo

kathy a. said...

NL, hooray about NB being able to play some, and doing well today!

Anonymous said...

(((p_k))) Sorry, didn't mean to make you feel more stressed, if I did. I think you are handling things beautifully, and kathy's advice to breathe is good advice! I am just all riled up on your behalf! Please know you have a whole crew of friends here on WW who are in your corner!
Love and hugs,
Neighbor Lady

Liz said...

(((PK))), I like Kathy A's advice. As long as you can make it to the next hearing without needing emergency intervention, your attorney's level of urgency is probably appropriate. Particularly since it makes your team look like the reasonable people with the measured reactions to your STBX's heinous and contemptuous actions.

We got MM's contacts back.

Liz said...

AW: Meal planning. We've been doing this for a few months now and OMG it's made a huge difference in our lives. We only go grocery shopping once a week now, and we're spending less and wasting less and eating better and eating out less and making fewer impulse buys (though today we bought a super duper fancy cheese, but just a wee smidgen).

W: WHY DID IT TAKE ME SO LONG TO DO THIS?

AW: I highly recommend Any List (we're using the free version). You share your list with your housemates and whenever anyone uses up the last of something, they add it to the list, and you never get to the store and realize you left the list at home.

kathy a. said...

That is terribly organized, Liz. And you say that people add things they use up to the list? Miracle!

The tree people haven't shown today. They left cones blocking my usual parking space in front of the house, but I moved them since I live here and they don't. Will move the car when they return, but parking's tight at the top of the cul-de-sac.

Liz said...

People DO add things to the list! It's awesome. It's mostly because of positive reinforcement, when they add things to the list, things get replenished. When they don't, then there is no Lucky Charms.

Liz said...

Actual conversation last week,

MM: "You went shopping today and you didn't buy Lucky Charms."
ME: "They weren't on the list"
MM: "But we're out."
ME: "Then you should have added them to the list."

Voila, not only Lucky Charms, but also other items he wanted were added to the list.

Queen of West Procrastination said...

Shared lists: the best! We use Our Groceries, and between that and the shared Google Calendar, our marriage was 150% happier.

Ugh, the meal planning has fallen off in the past couple of weeks. Apparently, according to the defunct meal plan calendar on my fridge, organization in my home fell apart on the day that Grandpa died. (Of course, I still have the same cold that I caught on the day of his funeral...)

W: while the basement cleanup effort is progressing, I'm noticing a musty smell in the basement, and I am dependent on antihistamines, or else my cough gets far worse.

(((((PK)))))) I really hope that your lawyer is doing a good job advocating for you, in spite of that response to you.

kathy a. said...

I do keep a list, and keep reminding people to add things to it. But I fall short on the part about planning several days worth of meals...

QWP, ick on the mustiness! Is there a way to dry it out down there? Would a space heater help with drying? I've heard of dehumidifiers, too, but not sure how expensive one might be.

PK, joining the hopes that your lawyer comes through for you. Can she find time before the next hearing to walk you through what to expect? This is NOT my area of law, but what happens in court is unfamiliar -- and TV shows, novels, etc. might not be very accurate. The uncertainty and unfamiliarity really add to people's stress!

Of course, your lawyer cannot promise how a judge will decide. But knowing the procedure, what issues will be addressed, how they will be addressed, and what often happens in similar situations can be really helpful. It seems very unlikely that next week's hearing will resolve everything -- contested situations take a while to work out -- but hopefully you'll end up with better ground rules. And a judicial whacking of the STBX for his atrocious behavior. xoxoxoo

kathy a. said...

Want to clarify, because I haven't said this in a while. Anything law-related that I mention here is offered in the spirit of friendship and mutual support. Not intended as legal advice -- which you should get from from a lawyer who practices in a particular area of law and in your particular state. xoxo

I'm allowed to have opinions about PK's STBX, though! And I know that most court proceedings are scary and weird, even without the certain je ne sais quoi that his behavior brings to this ordeal.

esperanza said...

W: Today is a day when progress seems glacial.

AW: but I did take a 30 minute nap

kathy a. said...

Yay for naps!

Ms. Polly has again risen to the occasion and scarfed down a little can of minced wet food -- mixed with water because she's having some dehydration. Junior cat behaved well and did not try to steal the wet food (which she doesn't even like, it's just the principle for her). Peace in the household.

P_K said...

Things are smoothed over with the lawyer, and moving along in general.

Anonymous said...

Yay, p_k!!
I am in awe of your strength and determination. Many hugs and much love from here.
--Neighbor Lady

Liz Miller said...

Yay!

What NL said, PK

Liz said...

MM had his annual physical yesterday. First time they asked me to wait outside. I...I...

MAH BAYBEE!!!

Sue said...

(((Liz))) I hear ya - those first "Mom, you can wait outside" moments sting.

Liz said...

I actually texted him to remind him to ask a question he had....and the text never got read, but he'd asked the question!

MAH BAYBEEEEEEE!

kathy a. said...

PK, glad things are smoothed over. xoxo

Aw, Liz! Good he asked the question. And -- it is actually a good thing to offer a chance to discuss things without parents, even if they are the best parents in the whole wide world.

The tree people returneth.

kathy a. said...

I may have to stop reading any news about this election.

Anonymous said...

Out at tea with Miranda!!!!!

Liz on iphone

kathy a. said...

Woot! HI, MIRANDA!!! xoxoxo

Queen of West Procrastination said...

I hope you guys are having an excellent time!!

P_K said...

And a motion for contempt has been filed, on multiple counts!

Queen of West Procrastination said...

PK: !!!!

kathy a. said...

Yippee! Contempt -- liking that. Go team!

kathy a. said...

Be safe this weekend. xoxoxo

Miranda said...

Liz is wonderful. She makes me want to move to VA so I can see her more often. :)

Liz said...

And you make me want to move to Michigan!!

YAY TEAM PK!

esperanza said...

Hooray meetups! Hooray contempt!! (er. You know what I mean).

AW: went to ride the horse this afternoon. Great fun by all.
W: Sweet totally gets that we are in our final weeks here. "I'm going to miss those guys." :(

kathy a. said...

I'm pretty sure you can find a horse or two in the environs of where you're moving.... But, sounds like Sweet is processing. <3

esperanza said...

Yeah, it's not just the horse. It's the whole setup--today the people's granddaughters were there (who are also friends from church), so there were snacks, and puppy cuddles, and the horses, etc. Sweet is definitely processing. Mini told the friends today that she cried for "two hours" when I told her we were moving. She did cry. Over the course of two hours, but it was not the whole time!

Sue said...

Yay Miranda and Liz!!! I'm glad you had such a great visit.

Go team PK!!!

((esperanza))

kathy a. said...

Meetups are so good! It is nice to enjoy them vicariously, even. ;)

My poor SIL's neurological disease is progressing, and she had another fall today -- only 8 days after the last one bad enough for steri-strips. This time, she's off to the ER for stitches. Going anywhere is really disruptive to her, and the ER is more or less the worst place for her personal level of calmness; but, nothing to be done when she needs to go there.

We are more or less resigned to knowing this will keep happening. And that because she has lost the ability to reason or retain new info, she isn't able to protect herself very well. The staff is so good about trying to prevent falls and trying to walk with her, but she gets going and there are also other patients, so things happen. This is such an unhappy disease process.....

Liz said...

I'm so sorry.

I was going to ask if there were anyone at the facility who could do stitches, but then I realized that if a fall is bad enough to need stitches, it's bad enough to be checked out at the ER.

But I am totally falling in love with the idea of a mobile ER that can come to you, like vets that do house calls for traumatized pets.

Which BTW, led me to ask if your vet can do a house call for Polly? Or if they know of someone who can do that?

kathy a. said...

Oh, Liz. I'd love a mobile ER, but can't imagine what the out of pocket would be on that! Her income is already less than her regular costs of care, nevermind any extras that aren't covered -- clothing, pullups, medical marijuana so the big drugs can be reduced (and help her be more steady), ambulance rides, hair styling (yes, that's necessary), etc.

I do know of visiting vets, but Polly is not a cat who would come out for one of them. Even though she's softened up enough to let the family she's known for 9 years pet her, sometimes. Most civilians have never seen her!

kathy a. said...

Yeah, this is part of what caregiving does to a family. We do have to consider out of pocket costs, just like we consider other costs, because one day we'd like to retire ourselves. And maybe before then, paint the house, since we've put that off 20 years. We're really lucky that she has a decent retirement fund and qualified for SSI (early, ~ age 50 due to her illness) -- I do not know how some families manage.

Liz said...

((Kathy))

Liz said...

Sonnet 18 Days

After eighteen short days, Aunt Flo returns.
I never even wondered where she'd gone
More welcome than a UTI which burns
Yet would she stay away, I'd carry on.

Superstitiously I bought some Thinx, (one
pair costs thirty dollars) only thinking
The cost would drive Aunt Flo to extinction
Alas, she thrives and my heart is sinking.

Why can't perimenopause be kinder?
Why can't it be mathmatical and neat?
If I could predict her I'd not mind her
It's never knowing that makes me feel defeat

Aunt Flo, when I was young I adored you
Please go before I start to abhor you

kathy a. said...

Well, we definitely have our Style Award for the week, and it goes to Liz!

kathy a. said...

Also, much sympathy. Perimenopause is a bitch. Did not achieve full menopause for the longest, myself. But for Aunt Flo to return after just 18 days -- after teasing you for so long with moving out? Just mean.

Liz Miller said...

Son points out that the 12th line has one syllable too many so edit never to not

Liz Miller said...

He also is giving me grief about rhyming you and you on lines 13 and 14. I said I'm rhymeing adhered you and abhor you. He's not buying

kathy a. said...

Well, he should get a good grade in English. Our Style Competition is not quite so rigorous, this week.

esperanza said...

W: A burned out turn signal bulb is a bigger problem. Bigger = more expensive. (It would be hard to get less expensive than a $4 lightbulb that I replaced myself, I guess). Left signal not working front or back.

AW: Baboos had a fantastic time helping me wash trashcans (not a normal chore around here, but thinking about moving them made me want to wash them. Disgusting) and playing with the hose for an hour.

kathy a. said...

Esperanza, I think it might be a matter of replacing the doohicky in the whatzits going to the turn signals. (All about the technical terms, here.) It's weird both front and back would go out at once, but this should be an easy fix for the mechanic person since the problem seems centrally located. Unless they need to order a part, which augers in favor of visiting your mechanic person well before The Move.

kathy a. said...

My husband the auto person informs me it is probably a "switch," which certainly narrows things down. /eyeroll/

esperanza said...

My dad, the auto person, hypothesizes that it is something wrong in the turn signal level and/or steering column (a switch, I can only assume). I called him after changing the lightbulbs and checking the appropriate fuse (pretty proud of myself for that one).

It would actually be easier to get it fixed after The Move, because the dealer/mechanic is closer to new house than here. But how long can I manage with only making right turns?

Anonymous said...

May I say-- I LOVE that your son is editing your poem about Aunt Flo!
Also, I am right there with you.... have also been having occasional 18 or 19 days in between. And then sometimes 25, sometimes 28, sometimes 31. Also, sometimes last for 5 days (not that I would EVER complain about that), but currently on my 11th day. For the second time in 5 months.
So, I second your ode.
And, also, definitely style-award worthy.

((kathy)) sorry about your sis-in-law.

--Neighbor Lady

kathy a. said...

OMG, 11th day??!! Oh, NL!

Esperanza -- going all Old Skool here, but there is always the traditional hand signal -- arm straight out from the driver's window for a left. Otherwise, 3 rights will get you a left (assuming a standard grid system), but you have to overshoot the desired street by a block.

kathy a. said...

NL, that might be worth seeing the doc about. It is probably no biggie, but jeepers. xoxo

esperanza said...

Would anyone recognize an old fashioned hand signal??

Weirdness of the evening: I normally never use any disposable dishes: no paper plates, no foil pans, etc, unless I'm taking a meal to a family in distress. But, tonight I made a casserole and cooked it in a foil pan, because moving. Cleanup was so so easy--I just chunked it in the trash. (My grandmother would be rolling over in her grave, if she had one, because I did not wash the disposable pan). I can see how this could be seductive....

Queen of West Procrastination said...

Esperanza: I always use disposable dishes when everything gets packed up. There has to be a point where all the dishes get packed up, and all the washing takes away time that can be spent packing and cleaning.

(I would definitely recognize the hand signal, but I don't know if others would! Aren't people supposed to use hand signals on bikes? Isn't that what I was taught when I was little? I just realised that I don't see hand signals anymore.)

(((Kathy and family)))

NL, 11 days is no good! And it might be a good idea to mention to your doctor, at your next visit.

Liz for style, and a parenting award, for raising a teenaged son who is comfortable editing a poem about Aunt Flo!

Queen of West Procrastination said...

W: my cough persists, mostly in the evening. (I already asked the doctor about it, since I had my annual physical on Tuesday, and she isn't worried about it.) And I just discovered that I'm out of my antihistamines.

Also W: child is still having issues about pooping in the potty, and messed up a lot of underwear over the past few days. I am tired.

AW: lovely weather has returned, and we're finally making progress on our yard. (We were supposed to get yard work done last week, but were derailed by bees.)

kathy a. said...

A lot of our locals use no signals at all, just startle everybody when they indicate by turning the car. (This tends to happen more with large vehicles that are capable of mowing down the competition.) But my kids had to learn the hand signals, and I do see some responsible bike riders using them.

No shame in using disposables for events where washing isn't practical, like picnics, potlucks, and moving.

Liz said...

NL, please get thee to a gynocologist. Eleven days is too much.

BTW, I track this stuff both in Pink Pad on my iPad and also in a spread sheet, including mean (32.16 days between start dates); median (24 days between start dates); Mode (23 days between start dates); High (111 days! that one really got my hopes up!); and Low (15, September 2012).

The last one before this took 101 days to arrive. I'd just like to have it all settle down.

esperanza said...

I can't remember the last time I've seen a hand signal. We don't have many bike riders here, though we do in the new town, so maybe I'll see some there.

Liz said...

I only see bike riders using them....but not often.

kathy a. said...

QWP, hope the cough improves. I'm somewhat prone to allergies and have mild copd, and it has helped really a lot to have a preventive inhaler called Qvar, and a preventive pill called singulair. Both mild and w/o side effects. (Not that I am in a position to prescribe! Just reporting good effects for myself, and my son with asthma.)

Tree report -- they came back this afternoon with a new truck, did a little more trimming, got all the removed tree parts left in the street into the chipper, cleaned up, and have left the neighborhood. Yay! This was supposed to be a 1.5 day job, but it started Tuesday p.m. and only just got done. My poor neighbor is recovering from surgery and an infection, and was napping when they appeared again out of nowhere. Glad to see them all go.

kathy a. said...

QWP, the poop part of the program is sometimes harder. Give it a little time. She will not enter kindergarten with pullups. (My uncle the dentist actually rewarded my favorite cousin with M&M's -- true story! But that's not actually necessary.)

P_K said...

When my blinker went out on my van I had to use hand signals until we got it fixed. It was an electrical thing in our case.

Anonymous said...

Thanks for the advice...I may try to check in... last time I mentioned this to my dr. she was not worried. I think we are thinking perimenopause and possibly fibroids (though they are not painful, fortunately). Still, may be worth revisiting, I suppose. sigh. Also wondering if having Neighbor Girl in the house is causing cycle synching or some cycle weirdness. I am kind of a data wonk, so I am going to see what patterns I can find in our data!
:) Neighbor Lady

Queen of West Procrastination said...

I was wondering if fibroids was part of the issue! (I have them in abundance.) Definitely a data point to mention whenever you have your next physical, but not an emergency, I'm guessing.

kathy a. said...

11 days seems like a really long time to me, though! Reason to watch out for anemia, if nothing else.

Anonymous said...

Thanks, Kathy and QWP. Yes, I am historically anemic, and am on iron supplements. They seem to be working, though!

Kathy a. so glad the tree people are done!

AW: went with Neighbor Boy to the local nursery and picked out some perennials, and planted them yesterday, including a lilac bush (which I love!!!). He is really into this, and also likes bright neon colors, so our flower beds may get a bit perkier if this keeps up!

:) Neighbor Lady

kathy a. said...

No such thing as too much color in a flower bed! Sounds like a wonderful excursion, NL!

Beloved and daughter are up at the Little Farm, visiting the bouncing baby bovine, just born this week. (I do have a no cow rule, even if they're really cute.)

(I have a lot of rules. Just today, my husband said if we can't have chickens, he wants a bee hive. Also, puppies and ducks and miniature horses and goats and pigs, and ....)

Anonymous said...

Ooooh, bee hive would be cool!
pigs? ugh, IMO
--NL

kathy a. said...

Bees are cool, if they live elsewhere. My mom was severely allergic, and I had a bad time the only time I remember being stung. Not in a hurry to find out if bees agree with me, under the circumstances.

Anonymous said...

Oh, no, then ugh to the bees too!
Yikes!
--NL