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Monday, January 23, 2017

Birthday Whining

Wednesday is Mini's birthday. The calendar says she is turning 7, though I'm not sure how that has happened. She informs me that she will now wipe her own bottom, since she is turning 7. This means I will no longer hear this precious sentence, yelled at the top of her lungs, frequently when I'm on the phone, "Mom! Can you come wipe my bottom? I had to go poop!"

My present concern (of the first world variety) is that no one will come to her party. We've invited the class, but nobody has rsvp-ed. Not sure what to think or do.

How are your whines, pixies?

88 comments:

kathy a. said...

Seven! Happy birthday, Mini!! I hope you hear something; why don't people RSVP? If you have phone numbers, you might call parents to ask -- although it's kind of terrible that you'd have to.

esperanza said...

School policy doesn't allow them to release individual email addresses (so I sent it to the teacher, who emailed it to everyone) or phone numbers. I don't really *want* the entire class to come, but a few would be nice.

kathy a. said...

Is it possible to chat with the teacher? Maybe she forgot to email them; or maybe she's been getting replies? Maybe local practice is to only RSVP if not coming? I don't know, but hope she'd sympathize with your concern nobody will show up. xoxo

My husband went to visit his sister with dementia yesterday. He is relieved that at least she is not agitated and tearful. She seems to no longer be trying to walk unassisted -- no falls for a few weeks now -- a physical decline, but the falls / cuts / fractures have been really worrisome. He didn't tell her about their aunt's death, because she simply could not process it....

I have a lot of concerns about the plans to cut or privatize health care, from repealing the ACA, to cutting SSDI, to privitizing medicare and VA, to making medicaid into block grants. This will affect a lot of people, if it is all put into motion. Eliminating a mandate to cover pre-existing conditions alone would be a disaster.

But our particular concern at the moment is my SIL. If they take more from her SSDI to pay for medicare, she cannot afford the memory care facility any more. If she needs to go to a skilled nursing facility, we would need medicaid to bridge the gap between income and costs. This threat makes me very anxious.

Sue said...

Happy Birthday Mini!!! 7 already?? I would check in with teacher to see if she's heard anything or received RSVPs. Are there any neighbour kids invited? Those are easier to follow up.

(((kathy))) Sorry about your SIL's continued deterioration. Also sorry you have the anxiety of the repeal hanging over your heads. Ugh.

esperanza said...

I'll admit that some of this is my own social anxiety...yes, there are a couple of neighborhood kids I can check with. The invite specifically said to rsvp to me, with several options for responding. I don't know what the norms are here--in small town, people generally responded if and only if they were planning to come. I can also ask the teacher to send out a reminder email.

Queen of West Procrastination said...

Happy birthday, Mini! (I'm jealous of your wipe-free world, esperanza.) Contacting the teacher and checking with neighbour kids is a smart course of action.

((((Kathy))))

Is it bad that my anti-whine is that our medical checkups were postponed for today? I breathed a sigh of relief when I got the call that our family doctor was called away for the afternoon and they needed to reschedule. What was I thinking, booking a double appointment (for both E and me) on the busiest day of the week?

esperanza said...

We'll see how long the wipe-free world lasts, QWP. She's been sooooo resistant for so long.

esperanza said...

kathy, hugs to you both for your sil's precarious insurance situation. I have my own late-night worries about Sweet, and pre-existing conditions and lifetime caps (her NICU stay was about a million dollars).

kathy a. said...

I know. Most families have one or a few people who could be totally screwed if these terrible health care ideas go through. xoxox

esperanza said...

W: too much adulting today. Laundry. Exercise (or my attempt at it. I walked 3 miles, not very quickly, listening to podcasts). Wrote a report, which will almost conclude my work on this task force thingie. Called about my 403b plan, which is a 401k for nonprofits.

Liz Miller said...

Turns out it's four friends who are not really friends, making MM feel very isolated (despite the fact that he has several other friends) AND these friends are in his classes, too.

I hate this clique bullshit.

Anonymous said...

(((MM))) I hate that stuff too, and so sorry that it is happening to MM.
--NL

kathy a. said...

This is why nobody, ever, wants to go back to MM's age. Sending hugs.

Sue said...

Darn it, that's so hard for MM. Cliques are hideous.

Queen of West Procrastination said...

Oh, that poor MM. So many hugs.

kathy a. said...

Dog: came in after dinner, went directly though a door that wasn't totally latched, snuggled on a bed not hers. She has been re-settled.

Leftovers: you put enough cheese and butter and sour cream and s few spices in mac+cheese, and the leftovers are really delish.

Internet: well, keep those truth detectors going.

Mondays: suck. But things settled down.

Liz Miller said...

One of the girls has apologized. The other three are not really worth bothering about. MMs best friend is still his best friend and is totally on Team Muffin Man, always has been always will be.

Anonymous said...

Well, yay for the possibility of growth and learning from mistakes.
And infinite yay for a best friend who really is.
Glad things are settling down.
--NL

kathy a. said...

Yes, good one of them came around.

kathy a. said...

Our dog went to the vet today, to have 2 infected teeth removed -- and while she's under, also remove a bump on her back. My husband is sad because the dog didn't want him to leave her there, and so he'll come home early today, in order to pick her up the second she is ready to go home.

kathy a. said...

The vet found that our pup has a cancerous growth under her tongue, and that it has spread to her lungs. So my husband agreed that there was no point in going ahead with the surgery. She'll just come home to enjoy what time she has left. xoxo

Liz Miller said...

I am so sorry.

Queen of West Procrastination said...

Oh no, Kathy. I'm so sorry. Xoxo

esperanza said...

So sorry about your doggie.

Sue said...

Oh kathy, I'm so sorry about your pup. xoxox

kathy a. said...

I guess we are all about pet hospice now. We've known our older cat is sick, has tumors, will die. But she keeps going, and has actually gotten OK with people rubbing her after all these years of retaining her feral roots -- and she stands up and purrs, and nuzzles, and has even gotten friendly with the dog! The old girls are, I think, comforting one another, sharing sunbeams when and while they can.

Liz Miller said...

Sending hugs

esperanza said...

Bad news for Waylon today. Two lesions, which were stable and they thought were "dead," have grown significantly in two weeks. Possibility of yet more brain surgery. He'll start 3 chemo drugs this week.

W of little significance: State law limits elementary class sizes to 20. Valentines come in boxes of 32. Why, oh world?

kathy a. said...

I'm so sorry about Waylon. Such fast growth is not a good thing. xoxoxo

Esperanza -- first of all, mess-ups. Second of all -- maybe the girls can think of other people who could use a valentine? I mean, that would mean a lot to grandparents and aunties and friends. xoxo

Anonymous said...

((((Kathy a.))))
(((Waylon and esperanza)))
sending love and prayers

--Neighbor Lady

Liz Miller said...

Muffin Man's classes were always at least 24 kids, and the last few years of elementary school, we sent in homemade cards (SO EASY). If I can find the template we used, I'll email it to you.

kathy a. said...

Think I've hit the head explosion stage of political news. Even second-hand, no TV.

Queen of West Procrastination said...

Oh no, I'm so sorry about the troubling news about Waylon, esperanza. Hugs and prayers, friend.

Anger more than whine: another fireplacing oil spill in my province, ON THE SAME DAY as the executive orders in the US for more pipelines. This spill is an hour and a half southeast of us, on First Nations land. The last one was this summer, and affected the water supply of a couple of our larger cities (north of here). And still my premier takes money from oil companies, and speaks more for them than for us. I'm angry that he got voted back in. I'm angry that more people are affected, and more of our land is contaminated. What a day.

A whine related to all of today's news: I have a tension headache.

Anonymous said...

I am thinking about reading 1984 because I think it might be more soothing than real life. #Sad!!
--NL

kathy a. said...

QWP -- honestly? I don't have words.

NL -- lot of my friends have also been thinking about 1984, the novel not the year. Because, things are pretty fireplaced up.

I called my son to tell him about the dog, and he and his sweetie had to put down their elderly guinea pig this morning. My boy rescued that one from the parking lot 4 years ago, where he and another were abandoned.

esperanza said...

W: I normally take All3gr@ for allergies but ran out a couple of days ago. Not willing to go without, I tried Mr. E's Zyrt3c yesterday and today. It seems to work better, but I feel so fatigued and drowsy. I had noticed this before, but the doctor (as well as the packaging) assured me that it was non-drowsy. I call baloney. The doctor also told me it's related to B3n@dryl, which puts me under the table with only a child's dose.

AW: I bought my regular stuff today, so hopefully tomorrow will be better.

kathy a. said...

I'm all behind keeping the meds that work at hand, Esperanza, once you find them. xoxo

esperanza said...

I know! I thought I had a backup bottle, but I was wrong. Or else I put it in a reallllllly safe place.

kathy a. said...

Hate it when I don't find my safe place until, like, 5 years later....

Sue said...

((((kathy)))

esperanza, I'm so sorry to hear about Waylon's new lesions.

QWP - I was in hulk-rage mode today when I heard about the oil spill. Unbelievable.

I have definitely reached maximum-capacity for terrifying news.

Liz Miller said...

QWP, I am sorry and rageful about the spill.

(((Esperanza)))
(((Kathy)))

Queen of West Procrastination said...

So, we're amidst oil spill cleanup, and the big press conference from the premier today was welcoming Pmurt's pipeline executive order. Just in case you think we're somehow more virtuous north of the border. Excuse me while I do some rage cleaning.

W: remember last week, when esperanza asked how her child was so much more energetic than her, when they'd both been awake since 4am? Guess what question I am also asking today. Child has her father's cold. We had to miss the preschool winter carnival. Miserable day.

AW: I was supposed to be classroom helper during the carnival (mostly to help get children in and out of winter gear), and Mr. Q was able to fill in for me. It's convenient that today is a turnover day between semesters, and so he had no students, and he was already in the building. (Seeing as he works at the same school.) In return, the preschool teacher was able to make sure he only needed to be around for half an hour, and so he didn't have to miss that much semester prep.

esperanza said...

((QWP)) hope E feels better, and sleeps better, soon.

Good news, y'all: I apparently have the power to move the sun and earth. I got griped at this morning for "making it too early" and "making it too dark." I promise to use this power only for good.

kathy a. said...

Oy, QWP. May everybody feel better.

Esperanza! That's a fab superpower! LOL

For some reason, I've been feeling completely run over by the quantity of News of the Day and Issues of Immediate Importance. And I know I'm supposed to call each critter's office about each thing, but that was beyond my capabilities, so I sent emails addressed to both senators and my critter -- 3 of them to each, collectively covering 17 topics of concern (several including sub-topics).

So I feel like I just caught up on a buttload of homework. And worry that maybe the messages will get lost? But they have staff, and I do not. I addressed it to all 3 so their staff will know other people will be seeing the same thing -- in the hope that perks them up enough to keep track.

kathy a. said...

I than read some additional fireplacing news, and ended up sending my critters a total of 4 emails apiece, addressing 22 topics. This is a lot more homework than a person should have.

Miss Dog is doing better today. The anesthesia wore off. She's sleeping a lot, as usual. She and Senior Cat were sharing a sunbeam.

kathy a. said...

I got a response from my congressperson! It was about one issue, the threat to withdraw from the United Nations. But it means somebody was reading my stuff, and he was already all over this one. The UN withdrawal thing is apparently called "the American Sovereignty Restoration Act (H.R. 193)" -- should you be moved to cite the very act itself.

esperanza said...

Mom of one of Sweet's classmates sent out an invite to her daughter's 7th birthday party yesterday. I was puzzled and couldn't figure out whose classmate it was. Normally people in Mini's grade (1st) turn 7, and people in Sweet's grade (2nd) turn 8. But Sweet promised me it was someone in her class. This morning, Mom sent out a correction: it's her 8th birthday party. This mom, y'all, is making me feel sooooo much better.

Sue said...

QWP - I hope E feels better soon. It's so great that Mr. Q could step in and help at school.

Yay kathy for hearing back from your many calls. Keep up the good work!

That's some terrific superpower, esperanza! :)

kathy a. said...

I only heard back about one issue. But hey. Had to resort to fax to reach a senator on the fence about a really awful nominee, because all 5 of her phone lines were impossible -- busy, mailbox full, call back later -- on several attempts. I had already emailed, but am told that doesn't count as much. So I wrote a whole letter and faxed it, and am pretty unhappy about this lack of phone access (even though I totally understand everything is flooded, because THERE IS SO MUCH badness in the political world at present).

AW: Just got tickets to Allegiance, the Musical, by George Takei. Showings at 600 US theaters on Feb. 19. Believe I will still need that, then.

The dog is back to her normal, although she keeps wanting to go sit in daughter's room. Sunbeams are prevailing today. It is so darned easy to pill a dog, using only a wad of wet food! (Not so much, with cats...)

Queen of West Procrastination said...

Smart idea on using the fax, Kathy! I've heard that her phone lines have been full, ever since people simultaneously heard that she's considering voting for him, and that she hadn't actually gotten that many calls about it.

AW: today was a bit better. Child slept last night. Still sick, but not as needy as yesterday.

Sue said...

Any response is good! Resistance sometimes requires persistence, right?

Yay for getting tickets to Allegiance - it looks like it will be really good.

I'm glad there's less needy with the sick-y today, QWP.

AW: I was back in the office today after my (sort of) study leave. It was a good productive day.

kathy a. said...

Yay for a productive day, Sue.

Today's a good day to give to Planned Parenthood, don't you think?

In first world, very small W's: the roller / scroll feature on my mouse gave up the ghost. So small, yet so annoying.

Liz Miller said...

Just did the quarterly filings for our mom and pop shop. Probably the last time I'm doing them, since it'll be Mr. Spock's job when I'm working my corporate job. Also did annual filings and printed our W2s ahead of schedule. Taxes will be next. Next week, I think, would be best.

esperanza said...

Sweet is developing into such a funny person. She's been struggling with spelling, so much that her teacher hasn't turned her tests back to her, because the teacher didn't want Sweet to be demoralized about it. So the teacher called me last week, and we did some strategizing together. Sweet worked a little (really, not a lot of extra) harder studying this week. Today was test day, and when she came home, I asked her how was the spelling test. She said, indicating her backpack, "It's in that pile somewhere." Indeed, as I sifted through the pile of papers, there was a spelling test with 15 perfectly spelled words! And a big "WOOHOO!!!!" from her teacher. So I emailed the teacher, thanking her for her help. She wrote back, saying how proud she was of Sweet, and that Sweet was really proud of herself, and had showed the test to her classmates, who all congratulated her. So funny that she was so nonchalant with me. So I'm super thankful for a teacher who works to make my Baboo successful, and works to make a classroom environment where her classmates encourage her. <3

kathy a. said...

Go, SWEET! And what a great teacher. oxox

kathy a. said...

Is anybody else old enough to remember pounding on the TV to get it to stop acting weird? Probably not. And in a fit of pique, I pounded my stupid mouse a couple times on the desk, and voila. Now it is fully functional -- the scroll thingy works, my screens are no longer scrolling randomly up and down. The new mouse arrives soon, but I'll save it for the next crisis. Hopefully, I'll remember where I save it... ;)

esperanza said...

ha! The pounding is an Old Skool reboot.

kathy a. said...

And it lasted for at least 15 minutes. I'm glad the new mouse is on the way.

Anonymous said...

Haha-- Kathy I do remember that! I also remember *being* the remote control when my father asked me to change the channel so he didn't have to get out of his chair (on a TV with dials). And, adjusting that little antenna thingy, when sometimes holding it was the only way to get a clear picture. Don't miss that, actually!
:)
Neighbor Lady

Anonymous said...

Ironically, I actually "fixed" a remote control at school by accidentally dropping it the other day.
:)
--NL

Queen of West Procrastination said...

Pounding on the TV to make it work! Would you believe that my family's first TV was black and white? Same with Mr. Q's (and we were both born in 1980). Mr. Q stopped liking Sesame Street when he first saw it in colour, and Big Bird wasn't the colour he'd assumed.

As a side note: my first digital camera developed a wonky display, which was a known issue, and the official fix was "whenever the display stops working, turn that camera upside down, and frankly tap the s on the logo with your knuckle." It worked!

Sue said...

Yay, Liz! Good work!

esperanza, I'm so glad Sweet's teacher is such a gem. WooHoo!!

I totally remember hitting the tv when the screen went fuzzy. Sorry the fix didn't work for long with your mouse, kathy.

QWP, that's hilarious about the camera. :)

kathy a. said...

Holy guacamole. I am absolutely stunned by the illegal and unconstitutional actions of our government in denying entry to the US, both to people who were thoroughly vetted and specially granted permission, and to green card holders (legal permanent residents). Just horrifying.

Liz Miller said...

I am beside myself about the Muslim ban. BESIDE. MYSELF.

And the TV at my dad's house until way after I went to college in 1987 was a black and white "portable" (about 14X14X18, HEAVY, with a handle on top). It was missing its knobs and we had to change the channel with needle-nose pliers and it was missing it's antenna, so we used a wire hanger.

And my dad and step-mom insisted that it be put away in the closet when we weren't watching it.

No. I'm not kidding.

They still keep the tv in the closet, but it's a flat-screen, and the closet is 3 feet from the foot of their bed, so they just open the closet door to watch it. They live in a two-room apartment in Chelsea. Debbie Harry lives down the hall from them.

And no, I'm not kidding about that, either.

kathy a. said...

OMG! We did the thing with the pliers when knobs broke off! And I recall the metal hanger fix for a broken antenna, too! Those old "portables" did weigh a ton.

I guess the fantasy that someone might start acting more responsibly when actually in office has officially been blown the fireplace to heck. While I think the order will be turned around -- being unconstitutional and illegal -- it has already done irreparable damage, and for no good reason. At.All. Way to fireplacing go.

esperanza said...

I have a knob on my stove right now that I used the pliers for.

Queen of West Procrastination said...

First of all, in the two years when I lived with a roommate (so: 2003-2005), we had a TV with bunny ears, which we kept on a rolling cart, and stored away in a closet when it wasn't in use. (There wasn't a good place in our living room to keep it, and we didn't get great reception, but also we both had laptops on which we could watch most things, and so it wasn't that big of a deal. But we seriously had a bunny ears TV that we kept in the closet, too!)

I'm appalled about the Muslim ban. I'm actually writing this on my computer because I'm doing my research and formulating words for a message to my member of Parliament. (I'm going the email route this time, because it's a Saturday and I don't know if anyone's around at the constituency office -- and Twitter tells me that he's in town and not at parliament this weekend -- and a letter would be too slow. But, from the previous email I sent, I know that there's a quick response time from his office.)

Update: okay! I did it! Now, time to make supper and parent my child. I've spent my day, glued to the news in horror.

Queen of West Procrastination said...

Late-breaking whine: child was just saying "I'm not feeling very well" (really suddenly, after a day of acting better from her cold) and then suddenly she threw up all over me.

kathy a. said...

Guess she meant it. xoxo

esperanza said...

Y'all. This sermon. Crossing my fingers that I can manage not to cry in the middle of it--that's always my risk when I'm talking about things that (a) I haven't completely worked through for myself; and (b) that touch me deeply. I'm so distressed, as you are, at every fireplacing thing the President has done this week. Trying not to spew that all over the congregation (some of whom probably agree with me, but not all), but definitely say what I believe is right and true. Prayers and good thoughts would be most appreciated.

Queen of West Procrastination said...

Praying that you had the right words, esperanza.

I'm going to bed while the news is (at least provisionally) positive, with the temporary stay. So much more to go, and so many awful things that happened in the meanwhile.

kathy a. said...

Sending much love and strength, Esperanza. We.Can.Do.It. (Think, Rosie the Riveter.) Also, love one another, do unto others, the obligation to care for the stranger, etc.

AW: Not one, but two federal court orders putting this wretched EO on hold, at least for now; at least for the people caught in transit. That means both courts found a substantial likelihood of winning on the merits. I expect it will expand to people not yet in transit, in coming days. Go team.

Anonymous said...

Prayers for your sermon Esperanza! May it touch hearts and change minds and motivate people. I bet it did/will!

I think we are heading back into nearby big city today for a protest on the ban. Daughter still freaked out by last weekend's crowds, won't go. But son (usually extremely shy) going with me. One of his closest friends is Musl1m. Once I explained more about what the end goal of the administration seems to be, he was willing to brave the crowds again. So proud of him!

Wish us luck. and parking. because even as much as he is willing to do this, the public transportation ride home last week-- we encountered an extremely mentally and physically unwell person with drug paraphernalia-- traumatized both kids (and me, truth be told.)

--Neighbor Lady

kathy a. said...

Go, Neighbor Family!

It is hard to get a handle on what's happening. It sounds like the administration gave the courts the finger, and they intend to go forward with the executive order; but they also kind of revised it on the fly to allow holders of green cards to enter.

So, lots of chaos and potentially a constitutional crisis. The courts are the final authority on interpreting law and the constitution.

Queen of West Procrastination said...

Hooray for the Neighbour family!

I'm watching this potential constitutional crisis unfold as well, Kathy, and it's terrifying.

esperanza said...

Thanks, y'all. It ended up being better in the preaching than in the writing, which is always a better outcome than the other way around. One man said, "I'm really glad you preached that sermon, but I kinda wish I hadn't heard it," meaning that now he felt like he needed to go do something. So, good.

Yay Neighbor Family!

Miranda said...

Remember the months we used to have that didn't have a constitutional crisis?

I have stepped away from the book of visages to sort out my feelings. I have a trip to Mordor scheduled in a week so I may change my mind about that. Kids are very traumatized right now and we are really struggling with how to be inclusive of those filled with bigotry. We don't have an answer but we want to keep trying.

Hugs and chocolate for all.

kathy a. said...

A member of this group who hasn't checked in for a while went to Mordor this weekend, and ended up at a demonstration. :)

Yeah, this has got to be very unsettling for those who are old enough to pay attention. I'm not yet at being inclusive of bigoted relatives regarding the issues of the day; have tried to be quiet on political things, and done my venting other places. Not ideal, but this is bad enough without added family drama.

xoxo

Liz Miller said...

My level of inclusion is basically, "THERE. Are you HAPPY NOW? You are ruining everything good about this country."

Yay for a good sermon, Esperanza!

kathy a. said...

Yes, excellent, Esperanza. I mean, the point is that we really do have to think about other people right now -- even though it is easier not to do that.

On the one hand, my level of recent contact with my representatives is such that I expect a hearty hug. On the other hand (the more sensible one), I hope I am just one of many, many, many weighing in as each new thing happens. And that they can find staffing for the volume.

My new mouse is purple, and that makes me happy.

Anonymous said...

Yay for a purple mouse.

--NL

Anonymous said...

Yay esperanza!!!!!!!
--NL

kathy a. said...

Sue and QWP -- horrified about events in Quebec. xoxoxoo

Queen of West Procrastination said...

So horrifying. This is what Islamophobic rhetoric does. It's happened here before. Violence happens every time hatred flares up.

esperanza said...

A mosque in a town near here was set on fire over the weekend, too. So sorry to hear the terrible news from Quebec.

Liz Miller said...

The Trump regime has me terrified. And furious. And grief-stricken.

But the resistance has me awestruck and inspired and uplifted.

Liz Miller said...

On a totally different topic, my son's high school is looking for volunteers to be "front door greeters" Described thusly:

"The PTSO would like to assist the front office staff by providing volunteers to answer the front door buzzer and oversee visitor sign-in. We are seeking consistent regular coverage during the week at set times freeing up the front office staff from this task. If you have a couple of hours a week, all that is required is for you to sit at the desk in the front hallway near the auditorium monitoring visitor entrance. It's a great way to catch up on reading guilt free ;)"

You know, I love me some good school volunteering, but this seems like it should actually be a paid position, since they want coverage all day every day. And I don't feel comfortable doing for free something they should be hiring for.

kathy a. said...

Not to mention, it sounds kinda like what they want is a security guard.