Thursday, June 26, 2008


Oh, the competition is tight this week, Pixies! Whatever Sue's happy cat is taking, a lot of us could use some of that. Or the more traditional good night's sleep, margarita, peace and quiet, and/or chocolate.

Congratulations! to Miranda, on an interview that went well (with the place she doesn't really want, and best wishes for Dream Job); to Liz, for the job possibility via a fellow whiner; to Madeleine, for Snuggly Girl's placement with the great 3d grade teacher; and Redzils, whose dissertation proposal rocked!

Old Skool Awards
to: Sarah, whose dishwasher replacement saga morphed into a water softener crisis; Madeleine, for stoopid speeling; and Amy, who always forgets to turn the timer on for pasta. Nods of recognition all around for these kinds of mishaps.
Style [prose division] Award to DevilMacDawg, for her stunning entry:
Antiwhine: Little Miss S did NOT poop in the tub.
Whine: She didn't quite make it to the potty.
So it goes. Happy Wednesday!
Elevated Risk of Mullet Awards to: Sarah, whose son is delighted to be the "ring barrier"; and to Amy, for her literary response to my daughter flunking writing:
I'm appalled (APPALLED, I say!) to hear that the instructor of an 8 a.m.
writing class would hold the students responsible for getting there, like, at
all. I mean, was Thoreau up at 8 in the morning writing Walden?! Oh, yeah, he
probably was. But he was a weirdo, so that doesn't count.

Golden Classroom Award to Klee, who deserves to not be treated like some fireplacing doormat, already.

Waaaaah! of the Petites Awards to: Esperanza's Sweet Baboo, cruelly deprived of second-by-second grandparental attention; and to Jenr's Baby Boy, inflicted with the dreaded shots.

Much Pixie love to: Sue, still with the headaches; and Margalit, struggling through another rung of the Fireplace.

The Orange Bowl Award to Amy, whose husband is so convinced this is the perfect baby room color that it is happening, baby, no matter what. Orange!

Weather switcheroo proposed for Sue, who just wants to wear shorts for one lousy day but instead has snow falling nearby, and everyone who needs to turn off the heat; also, for those flooded and those droughted.

Hugs and condolances to all the Pixies afflicted this week by [among other things]: bad stuff; husbands working themselves silly; students disappearing with the poor excuse of summertime; house selling; family illnesses, and anticipating the loss of a loved one; weather, cold or the other extreme; pukies; plumbers; family weddings; headbanging interviews; neurotic cats; grocery shopping; poop; lack of sleep; parking tickets; anticipated disillusionment; waiting for word; home improvement projects; trouble planning bloggy playdates!; stolen money; messy houses; insurance woes; smells like teen spirit; kids who sleep like whiney, cranky babies; and unexpected projects now due.

Here's to better days! See you next week, when our good friend Klee will host the festivities with her usual charm and fun.

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Whining: Out of the Furnace, Into the Fireplace Edition

Greetings, Pixies! Let's get the party rolling with an antiwhine: Someone found the thermostat, and my beloved evening fog has returned! Most of the last week has been hot hot hot, and I hope other California pixies are away from the fires. The closest are 30 miles from me, but we can smell the smoke. Here's to cooler conditions and a quick victory for the firefighters.

Further antiwhine: The new project came through, just in time to avoid the State Budget Rodeo!

Department of learning things the hard way: My lovely daughter, a gifted writer, has to repeat her writing class next year. Raw talent, my friends, is no substitute for getting to that 8 a.m. class. As always, chocolate and gratitude to all the teachers out there; sometimes the lesson is not one a person wants to learn, but I have a feeling she will not want to make these mistakes again.

Neverending whine: Still chasing doctors and lawyers in an effort to get things settled for my mother. Dr. Wonderful is no longer on the cluestick list, but progress is slow all around. We are so lucky that the stepbrother we didn't know before turned out to be an excellent relative.

OK, Pixies -- let 'er rip! Prizes for Old Skool, Style, Elevated Risk of Mullet, and Dan Ratherisms!!

Friday, June 20, 2008

The Awards That Almost Didn't Have a Title

The Miss Congeniality Award goes to kathy a., because she’s so sure she doesn’t deserve it, but she has plenty of kindness for her fellow pixies.

The Dan Rather Award goes to Amy for the phrase “pesky as a cat out of kibble” with runner-up to liz for “as absorbent as a dainty hanky in an Iowa flood.” (Hat tip to kathy a. for naming the prize. Now the rest of us have something to aim for next week!)

Best Whine/Anti-whine Combo goes to esperanza, whose sweet baboo might not need oxygen any more . . . if Mama could stop kicking her own butt long enough to get a good reading on the pulse oximeter.

This week’s Bodily Fluids are courtesy of liz. (We hope you are feeling better about yourself by now, honey).

Bonus Department of Redundancy Department Award to liz and her bean stalks that are growing like bean stalks! Wow!

Superhero Award to Margalit for putting herself between a nasty school administrator and a medically fragile child. Your prize is . . . the remote control for your new AC. Never to be handled by teenagers.

Using Your Words Award to Jenevieve for accurately describing her mom’s chest pain to the paramedics. Gulp. We hope you are back to the relaxing vacation thing again, Jeni!

Pioneer Woman Award to Amy, for best use of forgotten stuff foraged from the medicine cabinet. Tums! The best friend of pregnant pixies everywhere. (Another hat tip to kathy a. See what I mean? She’s Miss Congeniality for sure.)

Old Skool Award to Andy, whose apartment is too short to exercise in. And anyway he’s on the night shift and never sees his girlfriend, so why bother working out?

Do You Really Want To Hurt Me? Award to KLee, for the Very Bad Situation that everyone was hiding from her. Boy, that does suck. The pixies will be here for you next year, KLee, though we’re sorry you will have such compelling material to work with.

Purple Kangaroo wins the coveted prize of Personal Shopping with Liz – I’m so jealous. (Visit her blog to see what I mean.) Have fun at the wedding, PK. You’ll look great no matter what you wear. And, a late-braking (ha ha ha) Holy-Rolley Award to PK's car for carefully rolling out of its parking spot and into the middle of the street -- where it hurt no one and nothing! Phew!

Sympathy to all those needing work, and congrats to those who have found it, even if HR does take an eon to get the paperwork together.

Hugs to Uccellina for the impending end to maternity leave. Those first couple of days? I call them the Twilight Zone. Schedule the first day for a Wednesday and meet us here . . .

And BREAK A LEG to redzils for the long awaited dissertation proposal meeting! Woohoo!

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Good for the Garden Edition

Greetings, pixies.

Following up on last week's sticky stormy whines, can I anti-whine that the alternating blue skies and torrential downpours are really good for my garden? Which (further anti-whine) my mother-in-law planted for me last week?

Yesterday afternoon, I had a delightful conversation with the mom of a one year old in the lobby of the library, complete with peek-a-boo, while we waited for the rain to go from "buckets" to "just rain."

Other than work stuff, which is pretty much comes-with-the-territory at the moment, I have to say my biggest whine is that I don't LIKE new car smell. Snuggly Girl likes it just fine, plus she now has a window that she can open. And My Love can now drive without jamming his knee against the steering wheel and injuring his hip.

But I'm pretty sure some of you have much better whines to share, so please do.

Thursday, June 12, 2008

Awards: The Global Climate Change Sucks Edition

This will be brief as it is my last day of freedom before I have to ramp up Camp Mom.  The best part of Camp Mom is that we no longer have to be out the door at 7:20 in the morning.  Otherwise, it's mostly a lot of work.

The cluestick posse would like to hand out rainsticks to knock some sense into Kathy A's Evil Sister who wants to impede care plans she has no plans in participating in.  Your Evil Sister and my Evil Uncle would get on like a house on fire.  Another special visit will be paid to Diane's boss.  Maybe we can knock some brains in him but it sounds like it would require more force than your average pixie is generally comfortable with using.

The lullaby fairy has been dispatched to JenR and her baboo, 

A lifetime supply of chocolate for Jenevieve is is looking at having to spend three whole months with her parents.  Good luck with that and we are here all summer to provide support.  I know I would need support if I had to live with either of my parents for three days.

An entire ticker tape parade for Sue because she finally got in to see the headache specialist who has promised relief albeit in six months.  The excitement may need to postponed while she cares for her husband with an abscess in a rather painful spot.  I hope that goes well.  

The coveted Elevated Risk of Mullet Award for best turn of phrase goes to Amy for /sigh/ Why can't everything just go my way? Particularly when it's convenient for me? Amen.

Many hugs to pixies trying to find comfortable, air conditioned conveyances to parties they wish not to attend, principled congressional nominees who didn't win the primary, dealing with the higher prices of food and fuel, less expensive camp options (HUZZAH!), all who are dealing with the crazy weather patterns, recalcitrant spouses who don't do what is asked, and those questioning their parenting abilities.  As a mother of three kids whose oldest is now a teen, I must tell you that there are good days and bad days.  The good days outnumber the bad days and I do the best I can do at any given time.  That is all we can do.

Have a great week, pixies, and stay tuned for next week when the marvelous Madeleine helms the brigadoon.

Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Welcome to Wednesday! The Sticky-Stormy Edition

Despite all the really nasty weather this week 'round these parts, life is looking pretty good and I am shockingly whine free this week.  My family is all coming over for dinner tonight? You know, the one's I pretty much always end up crying over?  And I have to clean the house for?  I'm happy to see them.   Plus, my house is pretty much clean all the time now that Spouse is gone.

I suspect my sanguine attitude is largely because my interview with Dream Company went very, very well last week and I have been called back to meet an even higher manager than I met the first time later this week.  My references have been contacted and tell me that Dream Company really likes me.

Could my days as a slacker SAHM (snicker.  as if) be numbered?

But getting back to the heat, I sure wish the days of thunderstorms and high humidity would be numbered.  And you can number your whines and anti-whines while I will bring the prizes which include o.m.g. ponies!!!! and rainbows for all.  Because I am just that excited today, dear pixies.  

I apologize for posting this so early, but I don't know if I will get back to it later what with the company and the barnacle children terrified of my working full-time away from home.

Thursday, June 5, 2008

Awards! Brought to you by King's Dominion!

MM and I are rushing out the door in an hour to spend the day with his friend LovesHighSchoolMusical and her father at the amusement park. So this is gonna be quick!

Elevated Risk of Mullet goes jointly to Miranda ("Lastly, anyone want a ten and/or six year old? Mine are for sale. The intersibling warfare is free.") and to Esperanza ("it is apparently impossible to squeeze 20 hours of work into one 8 hour day").

The Houseselling Stress Award goes jointly to Sue and Susan. We are all sending fluffy wishes and a crate of lemons to each of you.

Purple_Kangaroo gets Whine of Substance this week. Peek, I'm sorry about your hip and hope that you can pop it back in fast. What right does your chiropractor have to be out of town when you need her?

Hooray to the future Dr. Zils!!

And the coveted Style Award goes to Quinn for the prose poem: "C'mon, folks, I only want to taste the rainbow! Why the conspiracy to torture me?"

And that's it for this week! Come on back next week and bring your friends!!!

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

Wednesday Whining: Job Hunt Edition

There is a place I want to work. It is a big company. It is a big, big, company. It is literally five minutes from my house. I applied for some jobs. I have not heard back.

Therefore, lo, I am blue.

Bring then unto me your whines, your woes, your wednesday wailings. Yea verily we will celebrate them and lighten our burdens through the sharing thereof.