A sure sign that we're fully into the preschool school year: since the beginning of September, our home life has been a constant parade of mild ickiness. Tiny colds and bits of upset stomachs pass through our home, as they pass through the homes of all the other preschoolers and friends. E and I are both sniffling a bit, and on the way home from the indoor playground, she complained that her tummy was queasy, and her friend (with whom we went to said playground) apparently is just now recovering from croup, and so we'll see how all this pans out over the next few days.
And so I raise my glass of hot herbal tea with honey to all the rest of you pixies, and ask how it's going in your home this week.
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I also have to whine about the need for mild cluesticks, for E's new indoor soccer coach. We knew that soccer was starting sometime roughly near November, and were waiting to hear what team she was on, and when she started, and then I finally heard via an email from the soccer photographer, who notified us that her team name and what time she needs to be there for her team photo next Saturday. I was just complaining about how we had only heard from the photographer, when I received a duplicate email to what I had deleted last week as spam: an email from someone I didn't know, with a subject line that was just "Belgium," no words in the message field, and a bunch of attachments. Now that I know that it's her team name, I actually clicked on the email and didn't delete it again, and it's her team roster and schedule. (I was able to find the old email in the trash, and it's the same thing. I assume the coach found out that no one got the last email, and re-sent it.)
Would it be bad form for me to email the coach and let him know that I'd presumed his last email was spam, because there were no words in the message?
Okay, I sent an email. I kept it very friendly (I presume this coach is very young, especially based on his email address), but I made sure to get my "please use words" point across.
An email is totally in order, QWP. Also: "Belgium"??? What happened to the "Butterflies" or "Ladybugs"?
Yeah, apparently this whole league (all the way up to the adult rec league) uses western European countries plus Canada? I'm still figuring all of this stuff out.
Um, excuse me? The subject line should have been "Soccer team assignments" or something like that. And definitely, there should be actual words in the email, not just links. I'll join that posse, although hopefully he's gotten a clue by four, plus some pieces of minds, already.
OK -- the up side of preschool exposure to everything? It develops the immune system! There's less of all that by elementary school; and also, parents develop info and strategies.
Well, it was less smoky yesterday, more smoky this morning, less smoky now. We're supposed to get rain by Thursday night, and that can't come soon enough for me. For the first time in over a week, we do not have a "red flag" fire warning for the hills behind our house.
Winds from Hurricane Ophelia, which went over to the European side of the ocean, appear to have stoked large fires and led to many deaths in Spain and Portugal -- which apparently got the winds, and not the water. And thus, the joining of both hurricane and firestorm. At the same fireplacing time.
The water plus wind parts of Ophelia went to Ireland, Scotland, and northern England, also escorting in deaths. I'm so done with this season of weather-related horrors.
Why, yes. I am a
little hypervigilant.
Got the t-shirt, yes.
The email was definitely in order, QWP. I'm also puzzled by the European country names for the teams.
I'm glad the smoke is better now kathy. This year the weather-related disasters are just so horrifying. :(
Hey pixies - I hope everyone is doing okay today.
I'm struggling with "metoo" - just the sheer volume of posts and the ache it all represents. It's heartbreaking. I haven't posted publicly because I'm aware that I am profoundly fortunate and haven't experienced what so many others have.
My one experience of feeling violated was non work-related. Years ago I had a massage therapist (a woman) whom I got to know when I conducted the wedding of her and her husband. She was a good massage therapist, but not great.
She talked me into a hot rock massage. For my usual massage, I would strip except for my panties. For this one, she said, "Everything off, please" and left the room. I thought it was weird but did it anyway.
She came back in the room and removed the cloth I had pulled over myself. I told her I wasn't comfortable without the cloth and she made fun of me for being shy. I insisted and she folded the towel into a narrow band that just covered my bottom.
She placed the rocks down my back and shoulders and, without asking permission, pulled my legs apart, with her hands way too close to where they had no business being. Not okay. I stayed for the rest of the appointment (she left me in the room alone after the rocks were in place, so that was good), paid, and left. I said nothing, but I never returned either.
Now it feels cowardly.
That's when I found the massage therapist I have now, and I love her professionalism and skill.
So, that's my story...
Oh, Sue. I do not understand that lack of boundaries.
I have not wanted to tell my stories, because they just make me feel bad. And no, they aren't the worst stories -- but they are things a person just shouldn't have to deal with, going about her work or her life.
I do feel affirmed that there are a lot of "me too" posts (and added me too comments), even without details. It's not a "top this" competition, after all; it's an illustration of how pervasive sexual harassment and assault is in our culture.
No, it's not a competition. I really appreciate the number of men who are posting honestly about how they had no idea of the number of women in their lives who experience harassment and assault.
Oh, I have "me too" stories too, and I remember more of them as I read others' tales. I'm just not particularly interested in sharing them on facebook.
But, just in the past week, I've been called "sweetie" by another minister and ogled by a man in a hospital elevator (while I was there to do my job). Both men old enough to be my grandfather, likely. It's just ick.
Hoping those brave enough to tell will be able to make a difference.
So many hugs, everyone. And Sue, I'm really sorry that happened to you. That massage therapist violated your boundaries when you were really vulnerable.
I'm fretting tonight: there's a wildfire in the west of my province (with an incredible windstorm), and a bunch of my family friends have been evacuated. One friend is working as an EMT and working to evacuate a hospital right now.
Oh, QWP! How awful. I haven't been watching all the everything, and didn't know about this.
Only found out about wildfires in Spain and Portugal that were fueled by Hurricane Ophelia, because I'm in touch with people in the UK, who got more of the wind and rain and flooding. There's a fireplace-load of weather going on. (Also, a hurricane in Europe? Causing both fires and floods? Can we say, weird?)
Keeping you in my thoughts, QWP.
I wish I could say I were optimistic about a brighter future wrt sexual harassment and assault given the conversation around Weinstein, but #MeToo is a whole lot like #YesAllWomen and other discussions and we have the Groper in Chief in the White House and...
Suffice it to say I wish I could say I were optimistic.
Yeah, I'm in the same boat, Liz. I like to think I'm realistic rather than pessimistic.
sorry about the threatening fires, QWP. It's all so stressful.
A friend -- real life and everything -- called out one of her husband's FB friends for posting a nasty demeaning-to-women photo as a birthday greeting. That thing got taken down, and also the daughter of my friends posted about how she hopes her 2 year old never ens up like that. Some change is happening at home.
Also, Prez Wonderful seems to be doing more wrong things every day, in every way. It's a horror show, but don't think he's making a lot of new friends. Who aren't criminals.
*ends, not ens
I don't know, kathy. I just saw a Gallup poll that has 47% of white people approving/49% disapproving. Blacks at 5% approval; Hispanics at 17%. White people, get your act together!
I'm tired of polls, aren't you? I don't even answer calls about polling, because so many dang people call every day wanting something from me, and I'm paying for my phone line, and also this is disruptive. So I have questions about the reliability of polls. Just saying.
Test test...is my internet working well enough for me to post? Most of the city has no power. We're in the middle of the wind storm now, and thankfully fire crews took care of the grass fire that started nearby, before it could turn into yet another wildfire. What a night. (I'm safe! We're a couple of hours from the places being evacuated.)
Oh, I called my friend who was recently reported dead by our college, only he wasn't -- because a new fire started down in the hills where he lives. But he's well out of the way, it's heading a different direction. It was great to just chat again, twice in a couple weeks. Nice to be back in touch after a few years, and the friendship is still easy and happy.
QWP! Yes, your post went through, and YIKES about the fire. xoxo
Hugs and love to pixie world this morning.
(((QWP))) What a frightening night you had! To have so much of a large city like yours to be in the dark is concerning. I'm hoping all the appropriate emergency back up power was working at hospitals and other necessary places. Between wind and fire (and snow in some places), it's been a rough autumn for the west.
kathy, I'm glad your not-dead friend is safe.
As for the Grabber in Chief, I can't even. He really does screw up daily. Yesterday with the gold star wife - I didn't think he could sink any lower, and yet, he did. It's fireplacing disgusting. *sigh*
The power came back on at 3am, and while the wind storm continues, it has died down from the wind speeds last night (120 km/h winds! I've never seen it this bad).
W: E has a bit of a tummy bug, and Mr. Q is leaving town today for a conference.
Yikes, that's a mighty wind QWP! Glad the power's back on.
I just watched the PM's short press conf about Gord Downie...he cried, now I'm crying. Amazing how one musician's life can have such an impact... *sniff*
W: Today marks two years since Mr. E's nephew died by suicide. While the grieving continues, in another part of myself, I'm amazed/horrified/not really surprised at how the family narrative about that event never mentions the accessible, loaded gun as a cause. They only talk about the bullying he was experiencing at school (there were also significant issues within the home, but those aren't talked about either).
AW: Mr. E's cousin has flown in from out of state to be with his brother this week. She's good folks.
(((esperanza))))
So many hugs, esperanza. (And that's a really good point about the easily-accessible loaded gun.)
AW: I've inspected everything, and even though this was the worst wind storm that I can remember, we had almost no damage (unlike last spring, when each wind storm caused chaos in our backyard). The new fence made a big difference, so much so that our light patio furniture didn't move at all.
Also, it sounds like all the evacuation orders in the west have been lifted. I did hear that one family friend lost some farm outbuildings in the wildfire, but not their home. I really hope that they didn't lose animals.
Sue, I'm pretty emotional about Downie too. I haven't brought myself to watch the PM's message yet, but just seeing a picture of him getting weepy set me off.
QWP, such fierce winds! Hope all is well.
((( Esperanza )))
On the possibly old skool side of things, all things considered: we've been having the worst low pressure system (connected to this wind storm), and my head is killing me. Yesterday, I had my first migraine in a year (although it was thankfully minor). I really hope this low air pressure stays far from Sue's region, since I know barometric pressure hits her hard.
Sorry about the migraine, QWP. So far, it's clear skies in our part of the world. Sometimes these systems will burn themselves out in the prairies and weaken before they hit us.
W: the people to whom I delivered the meal last Friday, with the okra, just posted an update that she's transitioning to hospice care. It's all so sad.
((( Esperanza ))) I'm so sorry. But I'm a big fan of hospice in situations where there is no real hope of recovery; where comfort is the best thing. She does not need to suffer her last days. Glad they updated everybody, because hopefully there won't be a lot of "I know she'll be just fine" coming in to torment them. xoxoxo
Oh, I'm a big proponent of hospice, too. And I don't question their decision at all. It's just still sad.
((((esperanza))))
So sorry.
--Neighbor Lady
QWP, we're predicted to get a cold front with strong winds on Sunday morning. I wonder if it's the same one that affected you last night? By the time it gets here, it will be a "cold" front, that will mainly just drop the humidity.
We're supposed to get something cooler from Alaska tomorrow night, with rain -- although, this isn't gonna be a huge amount of rain, probably. Still, after a full week and a half, they think the fires will get under control friday.
My, we have had a lot of weather related items to talk about lately....
Clyde, the rescue dog from Hurricane Harvey, has really gotten comfortable. And much more active than we expected. But, happy boy.
There will be a local memorial next week for one of the heroes of my work, a colleague I worked with for years, who died this past summer. Need to see my people. Can't afford a trip to New Orleans, where the big memorial will be next month.
Oh esperanza, I understand that sadness, when the care switches to palliative. (Where you know it's the caring choice, but having to face it is hard.) Many hugs.
Hugs for Kathy, as you go to the local memorial for your colleague.
AW: we got through the day (and Mr. Q even came home for a quick lunch before he left town) better than expected. E's tummy did so much better than it seemed when she woke up this morning, and we practised remembering that Daddy wouldn't be coming home in the night, and that if she woke up early to try to play with him, it would just be me.
((((esperanza)))) I'm so sorry about your friend, but pleased that she will be in hospice where her pain can best be managed.
Yes, weather is a definite thing right now. So much going on...
How great that they're holding a local memorial for your friend, kathy. That's such a considerate thing to do when so many friends/colleagues can't make it to the main service.
I'm also glad to hear that Clyde is fitting in so well. :)
W: I'm going to have to keep E home from school today, since it's looking like she really does have a stomach bug. Nothing really bad, but just bad enough that it's pretty clear that she's likely contagious. Dang it. I was really looking forward to having some time to myself, and I suspect she'll be home on Friday too.
Aw, I hope E feels better soon, well enough to go to school on Friday.
Funny: I went to see a church member's husband. He was in the hospital for 2 weeks, and has been moved to a skilled nursing center. He just got there day before yesterday. I came in the room this morning and told him who I was (aside: this is my usual practice, even if I think the person knows/remembers me...just saves awkwardness all around). He said, "oh good. You're not one of *them*" Apparently he's done with people poking and prodding and moving him!
You made his day, Esperanza!
Best for E feeling better.
It turns out that the excitement from Tuesday night's wind storm, with its gusts that JUST qualified as hurricane-force, isn't quite over yet: we somehow didn't notice until now, but the 75-foot evergreen next door was uprooted in the storm, and the only thing holding it up is the elm beside it. Now, if the elm wasn't there, it would have landed across both lawns. But, with the elm holding it as it is, if there's a big wind, it's landing on the front of both houses (actually, squarely on my bedroom). My in-laws came over to help (since I was not hauling a sick kid in jammies to go talk with neighbours), and I found out that the neighbours been trying to get their landlord to have the tree dealt with since yesterday morning. (He came over, looked at it, and left.) I had the neighbour contact him again (and mention not only that it could land on my house, but homeowner insurance, his liability, etc.). He'll be here tomorrow morning, and I'm going to insist that he stop vaguely checking tree company quotes and call one that does emergency, same-day service. (Also, his insurance should cover it! I called to check mine, to give them the head's up, and they said that if the tree had been on my lot, they'd have been able to deal with it immediately.)
I'm avoiding fretting about "what if the forecast is wrong and a big wind dislodges that tree" and am instead whining that I have to sleep on the couch tonight, which isn't my bed. (I promised my whole family I wouldn't sleep in my bedroom. But the guest room is in the basement, and I need to hear E, since last night when she needed me to help her to the bathroom, she only whimpered.)
24 hours until Mr. Q gets home.
Oh my, QWP!! That's concerning, to say the least. I'm glad you could be there to put some urgency on the situation for the landlord. At this point, it definitely qualifies as an emergency! I hope it's taken care of today.
AW: Our garden at the church won an award! Two of our gardeners were there to accept the award, and when I arrived, one of them said "Oh good, you can accept the award!" Uh, no. I have nothing to do with the maintenance or beauty of the garden, so I was photographer only. If you check out the photo on the book of faces, the woman on the left has a prosthetic leg (she lost a leg to cancer) - and still does more gardening than anyone else. Remarkable folks, all of our green thumb team.
Yikes, QWP!
Sue, hooray for your wonderful gardeners!
Sue, my friend was an honourable mention at the same garden awards show! (For apartment window boxes.)
We did get rain in the night! Not a huge amount, but it ran down the drainspouts from the roof, and I could hear it in the night, even! Progress on fire containment, but it might be Tuesday before full containment. Sunday, our temperatures are supposed to spike again.
Rain! I hope that you get more of that, instead of the temperature spike.
We have a tree coming down next door! The owner is a firefighter, and he rounded up a group of guys to help him.
Oh, good about the tree!
Yay for rain and trees coming down in a controlled manner!
AW: the tree came down safely, and now I'll be able to see the sunset from my house. Also, I'm writing this from my bed, which I missed.
Good news about the tree!
Every year for some 20 years, I've helped with a fundraiser here for a do-good legal organization in the South. It's always held mid-December (tied to a legal conference in The City nearby). My friend who organized it died a few years ago, but we've carried on. The person in charge now is running late this year, but she finally got in touch with me and a few others about calling the most reliable donors so we can put some sponsor names in the invitation. I know this doesn't sound like so much fun, but the event always is; it's a chance for the local community in our work to hang out and catch up.
Why is she running late and feeling stressed? Among other things, her kids have LICE and can't go back to school until all the eggs are gone. Very old skool.
The ratio of meltdown to happy is a little high this afternoon.
Etiquette question: next weekend I'm attending a meeting out of town and spending the night with some friends--not good friends, but more than acquaintances. I need to bring them a thank you gift of some sort. I know they're trying to eat healthy, so my normal "brownies" inclination is out. A plant comes to mind, but it would have to sit in my car all day long, so that's probably out. Other ideas?
Sorry about the meltdowns. It is end of the week...
Might it be possible to stash the plant someplace indoors, instead of leaving it in your car? Or, drop it on their porch before you go to the thing?
What about some other food item -- maybe something easier to get where you are, or a dish you make and freeze -- something that would last OK in a cooler? I also like gift baskets, but usually that involves treats -- although you could do fruits and healthier stuff, keep that in the cooler, and load the basket when you get there? Thinkin' out loud.
Fruit basket? Tea sampler? A pretty dish? Taper candles? A nice-flavoured bottle of vinegar? (I'm starting to look through a list of "unique host gifts".) A couple of tea towels? A nice-smelling bar of hand soap?
I hope the melting down children go to sleep soon, and sleep off that exhaustion.
oh...cooler! Do you think I could keep a plant in the cooler in the car? That might work, depending on how hot it is outside.
I'm sure you could, esperanza!
Cooler for the plant would probably work fine, too. Groupthink!
E is asleep, and Mr. Q will be home in two hours: I made it. I got through this ridiculous half a week, during which everything weird happened while Mr. Q was out of town.
A medal for QWP!
Florists keep flowers in coolers. Duh. Thanks, y'all! I saw some pretty chyrsanthemum (good gravy, how is that spelled?) plants today. That'll work.
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