Awards: Lean On Me Edition*

This week in Pixieland is like an episode of M*A*S*H. "Attention all personnel: incoming choppers." And the Pixies have responded with their usual grace, humor, good sense, and caring. Love you guys!

Well Oiled Rube Goldberg Mechanical Disaster Award goes to JenR -- who knew that oil on the spark plugs would destroy successive pieces of a car until finally the exhaust system collapses in defeat? To the tune of $1000, no less, which in our opinion would about cover the amount of chocolate needed to make this seem OK.

Hers was not the only car-related disaster. Redzils wins the Oh You Have an Roadside Emergency? Please Hold Award for the saga of flat tire, broken jack, 400 hours on hold, and car in the shop. A Friend Indeed Sash to Redzils' friend, who did not even blink when she had a tantrum toward the end of the long wait.

Speaking of meltdowns, Madeleine wins the Incident Award, for dealing with her normally sweet child's kicking incident at the same time she was dealing with some scheduling madness, the kind where things get changed and you don't find out until too late. Gah.

Amy wins the coveted Elevated Risk of Mullet Award for "I'm PMSing so intensely that I was ready earlier today to give my children to the nearest ice cream truck driver. I even made it Facebook official." Have we not all been there, one time or another?

Amy's student gets the Tough Noogies Award for earning a failing grade, then getting all pissy about it. If PMS makes you not care about the student's hissy fit, I see that as a benefit.

Aunt Flo wins the Give Us A Break, Already Award, as she featured prominently in many whines and comments this week. Thanks in particular to Pixies offering thoughtful comments about dioxin in tampons [say, what???] and about the diva cup.

Noble Order of the Giant Pimple Awards to all fellow sufferers, past, present, and future. Didn't you once think this would cease to be an issue along about the time you graduated high school? Ha. Here at the Whiner's Ball, you will hear the truth about those issues that aren't discussed in polite company.

We're getting to the most important award of this ceremony: Sarah wins the Fabulous Addition to the Lexicon Award for her whine of fear about the giant Zip floating through the realm. Zip! Love it!

Best AntiWhine Award to Neighbor Lady, who got a new printer cartridge, so she could print her amended tax return! Yeah, it's a heck of a time when that floats your boat, but having some things work out really does feel good.

Tick, Tok Award to Liz, who is a little freaked out that her former babysitter is GRADUATING COLLEGE! We don't know what gets into kids' heads, going and growing up so fast. But yay, anyway!

Ding, Dong, the Meeting's Dead Award to Sue, who is finally, finally free from the breakfast meetings from hell!

Fingers crossed for Redzils, hoping the ~whisper~ interview ~end whisper ~ turns out well!

Hugs to all who are suffering this week from illness, ill friends and family, accidents, anxiety, job hunting, and the rest of it. Particular hugs to Anonymous during this time of crisis. xoxoxo

See you next week, when the incomparable Redzils will host!

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* The title of this award session comes from the song that came to mind, reviewing this week's offerings.